Think sideways!

If I were a grave-digger or even a hangman, there are some people I could work for with a great deal of enjoyment.

VI: A hungry dog hunts best. A hungrier dog hunts even better. VII: Decreased business base increases overhead. So does increased business base. VIII: The most unsuccessful four years in the education of a cost-estimator is fifth grade ari

Praise the sea; on shore remain.

Wait for that wisest of all counselors, Time.

"Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him."

Briefly stated, the findings are that when presented with an array of data or a sequence of events in which they are instructed to discover an underlying order, subjects show strong tendencies to perceive order and causality in random arrays, to perc

If any man wishes to be humbled and mortified, let him become president of Harvard.

Nothing succeeds like excess.

Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.

The day advanced as if to light some work of mine; it was morning, and lo! now it is evening, and nothing memorable is accomplished.

Wishing without work is like fishing without bait.

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.

British education is probably the best in the world, if you can survive it. If you can't there is nothing left for you but the diplomatic corps.

The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

He that bringeth a present, findeth the door open.

Rome was not built in one day.

Well, we'll really have a party, but we've gotta post a guard outside.

When the ax entered the forest, the trees said, "The handle is one of us!"

Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational.

If it doesn't smell yet, it's pretty fresh.

There is no proverb that is not true.

... why should you waste a single moment of *your* life seeming to be something you don't want to be? Lord, that's so simple. If you hate your job, quit it. If your friends are tedious, go out and find new friends. You are queer, you lucky fool, a

From a certain point onward there is no longer any turning back. That is the point that must be reached.

The only thing that experience teaches us is that experience teaches us nothing.

There's no such thing as an original sin.

Coincidences are spiritual puns.

Every person, all the events in your life are there because you have drawn them there. What you choose to do with them is up to you.

If the path be beautiful, let us not ask where it leads.

To have died once is enough.

The first rule of all intelligent tinkering is to keep all the parts.

He who fears the unknown may one day flee from his own backside.

Whenever anyone says, "theoretically," they really mean, "not really."

If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

When I have one foot in the grave I will tell the truth about women. I shall tell it, jump into my coffin, pull the lid over me, and say, "Do what you like now."

He that composes himself is wiser than he that composes a book.

Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.

An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.

Turn the other cheek.

I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Do you know the difference between education and experience? Education is what you get when you read the fine print; experience is what you get when you don't.

A good reputation is more valuable than money.

Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.

A game can by God repent or we'll punish it. That's how they did it in Salem in the seventeenth century, and that's how we'll do it now.

A good question is never answered. It is not a bolt to be tightened into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the hope of greening the landscape of idea.

Let your conscience be your guide.

There is no sin but ignorance.

Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills.

Even the best of friends cannot attend each other's funeral.

Catharsis is something I associate with pornography and crossword puzzles.

The profession of book writing makes horse racing seem like a solid, stable business.

A woman's a woman until the day she dies, but a man's only a man as long as he can.

If at first you don't succeed, you're doing about average.

Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.

Take the folks at Coca-Cola. For many years, they were content to sit back and make the same old carbonated beverage. It was a good beverage, no question about it; generations of people had grown up drinking it and doing the experiment in sixth gr

We have art that we do not die of the truth.

What makes you think graduate school is supposed to be satisfying?

The sunlights differ, but there is only one darkness.

Sweet April showers do spring May flowers.

Since everything in life is but an experience perfect in being what it is, having nothing to do with good or bad, acceptance or rejection, one may well burst out in laughter.

There are ten or twenty basic truths, and life is the process of discovering them over and over and over.

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.

I will make you shorter by the head.

If a fool persists in his folly he shall become wise.

If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem.

Who dat who say "who dat" when I say "who dat"?

"Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around. No contest."

There is nothing so easy but that it becomes difficult when you do it reluctantly.

It is ridiculous to call this an industry. This is not. This is rat eat rat, dog eat dog. I'll kill 'em, and I'm going to kill 'em before they kill me. You're talking about the American way of survival of the fittest.

It doesn't matter whether you win or lose

No is no negative in a woman's mouth.

Three minutes' thought would suffice to find this out; but thought is irksome and three minutes is a long time.

Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.

Certain passages in several laws have always defied interpretation and the most inexplicable must be a matter of opinion. A judge of the Court of Session of Scotland has sent the editors of this book his candidate which reads, "In the Nuts (unground

If we see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's the light of an oncoming train.

If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.

No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.

Adde parvum parvo manus acervus erit. [Add little to little and there will be a big pile.]

If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life.

The Worst Car Hire Service When David Schwartz left university in 1972, he set up Rent-a-wreck as a joke. Being a natural prankster, he acquired a fleet of beat-up shabby, wreckages waiting for the scrap heap in California. He put on a cap and lo

A platitude is simply a truth repeated till people get tired of hearing it.