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Life is the childhood of our immortality.

Ambrose St.


Go to the Scriptures... the joyful promises it contains will be a balsam to all your troubles.

Ambrose Bierce


What good is an obscenity trial except to popularize literature?

Ambrose Bierce


Your chances of getting hit by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky, and say, "Storms suck!"

Ambrose Bierce


"Listen to what I say, not what I mean. I mean ...."

Ambrose Bierce


You have to run as fast as you can just to stay where you are. If you want to get anywhere, you'll have to run much faster.

Ambrose Bierce


There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless. Observe the ass, for instance: his character is about perfect, he is the choicest spirit among all the humbler animals, yet see what rid

Ambrose Bierce


A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the damned things is ample.

Bierce Ambrose


My dear People. My dear Bagginses and Boffins, and my dear Tooks and Brandybucks, and Grubbs, and Chubbs, and Burrowses, and Hornblowers, and Bolgers, Bracegirdles, Goodbodies, Brockhouses and Proudfoots. Also my good Sackville Bagginses that I w

Bierce Ambrose


We know all about the habits of the ant, we know all about the habits of the bee, but we know nothing at all about the habits of the oyster. It seems almost certain that we have been choosing the wrong time for studying the oyster.

Bierce Ambrose


were found to be wearing neckwear that was tighter than their neck circumference. The visual discrimination of the 22 subjects was evaluated using a critical flicker frequency (CFF) test. Results of the CFF test indicated that tight neckwear signifi

Bierce Ambrose


It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.

Bierce Ambrose


We should realize that a city is better off with bad laws, so long as they remain fixed, then with good laws that are constantly being altered, that the lack of learning combined with sound common sense is more helpful than the kind of cleverness th

Bierce Ambrose


Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

Bierce Ambrose


It's not easy, being green.

Bierce Ambrose


A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours.

Bierce Ambrose


What's a cult? It just means not enough people to make a minority.

Bierce Ambrose





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I never trust a man unless I've got his pecker in my pocket.
Johnson Lyndon Baines

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Ambrose Bierce
 
 
 
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