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Life is too short to be taken seriously.

Ba Dave


Thou hast seen nothing yet.

Barry Dave


It is better to have loved and lost

Barry Dave


Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game - it, and high taxes.

Barry Dave


The salary of the chief executive of the large corporation is not a market award for achievement. It is frequently in the nature of a warm personal gesture by the individual to himself.

Barry Dave


It's not enough to be Hungarian; you must have talent too.

Barry Dave


Whenever the literary German dives into a sentence, that is the last you are going to see of him until he emerges on the other side of his Atlantic with his verb in his mouth.

Barry Dave


Any stone in your boot always migrates against the pressure gradient to exactly the point of most pressure.

Barry Dave


A team effort is a lot of people doing what I say.

Barry Dave


He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.

Barry Dave


A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow.

Barry Dave


A prediction is worth twenty explanations.

Barry Dave


He who knows, does not speak. He who speaks, does not know.

Barry Dave


Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other.

Barry Dave


Of all men's miseries, the bitterest is this: to know so much and have control over nothing.

Barry Dave


Go not to the elves for counsel, for they will say both yes and no.

Barry Dave


If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.

Barry Dave


Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success.

Barry Dave


Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.

Barry Dave


Ignorance is the Mother of Devotion.

Barry Dave


Whatever doesn't succeed in two months and a half in California will never succeed.

Barry Dave


Ask not for whom the Bell tolls, and you will pay only the station-to-station rate.

Barry Dave


Mum's the word.

Barry Dave


Star Wars is adolescent nonsense; Close Encounters is obscurantist drivel; Star Trek can turn your brains to puree of bat guano; and the greatest science fiction series of all time is Doctor Who! And I'll take you all on, one-by-one or all in a bunc

Barry Dave


Show business is just like high school, except you get paid.

Barry Dave


A woman's a woman until the day she dies, but a man's only a man as long as he can.

Barry Dave


Don't steal; thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.

Barry Dave


Man is the measure of all things.

Barry Dave


The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice.

Barry Dave


For if there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life.

Barry Dave


Then, gently touching my face, she hesitated for a moment as her incredible eyes poured forth into mine love, joy, pain, tragedy, acceptance, and peace. "'Bye for now," she said warmly.

Barry Dave


Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills.

Barry Dave


Fourteen years in the professor dodge has taught me that one can argue ingeniously on behalf of any theory, applied to any piece of literature. This is rarely harmful, because normally no-one reads such essays.

Barry Dave


Well, he thought, since neither Aristotelian Logic nor the disciplines of Science seemed to offer much hope, it's time to go beyond them... Drawing a few deep even breaths, he entered a mental state practiced only by Masters of the Universal Way of

Barry Dave


Mind! I don't mean to say that I know, of my own knowledge, what there is particularly dead about a door-nail. I might have been inclined, myself, to regard a coffin-nail as the deadest piece of ironmongery in the trade. But the wisdom of our ances

Barry Dave


BS: You remind me of a man. B: What man? BS: The man with the power. B: What power? BS: The power of voodoo. B: Voodoo? BS: You do. B: Do what? BS: Remind me of a man. B: What man? BS: The man with the power...

Barry Dave


Immature artists imitate, mature artists steal.

Barry Dave


I remember when legal used to mean lawful, now it means some kind of loophole.

Barry Dave


Take the folks at Coca-Cola. For many years, they were content to sit back and make the same old carbonated beverage. It was a good beverage, no question about it; generations of people had grown up drinking it and doing the experiment in sixth gr

Barry Dave


Force has no place where there is need of skill.

Barry Dave


You or I must yield up his life to Ahrimanes. I would rather it were you. I should have no hesitation in sacrificing my own life to spare yours, but we take stock next week, and it would not be fair on the company.

Barry Dave


Not to laugh, not to lament, not to curse, but to understand.

Barry Dave


It is sweet to let the mind unbend on occasion.

Barry Dave


My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I threw my amplifier out the dormitory window. We did not act in haste. First we checked to make sure the amplifier would fit through the frame, using the belt from my bathrobe to meas

Barry Dave


Where it is a duty to worship the sun it is pretty sure to be a crime to examine the laws of heat.

Barry Dave


The optimist thinks that this is the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist knows it.

Barry Dave


There is no doubt that my lawyer is honest. For example, when he filed his income tax return last year, he declared half of his salary as 'unearned income.'

Barry Dave


I appreciate the fact that this draft was done in haste, but some of the sentences that you are sending out in the world to do your work for you are loitering in taverns or asleep beside the highway.

Barry Dave


It's from Casablanca. I've been waiting all my life to use that line.

Barry Dave


Money can't buy happiness, but it can make you awfully comfortable while you're being miserable.

Barry Dave


To know Edina is to reject it.

Butler Dave


I used to be disgusted, now I find I'm just amused.

Dave


He that bringeth a present, findeth the door open.

Dave Barry


I consider a new device or technology to have been culturally accepted when it has been used to commit a murder.

Johnson Dave


It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.

Millman Dave


Look, we trade every day out there with hustlers, deal-makers, shysters, con-men. That's the way businesses get started. That's the way this country was built.

Parnas Dave


When one burns one's bridges, what a very nice fire it makes.

Thomas Dave


Consider well the proportions of things. It is better to be a young June-bug than an old bird of paradise.

de Dave Johnson on





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A dead man cannot bite.
Gnaeus Pompeius

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
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