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Perhaps no person can be a poet, or even enjoy poetry without a certain unsoundness of mind.

Ba Dave


Why attack God? He may be as miserable as we are.

Barry Dave


A hundred years from now it is very likely that [of Twain's works] "The Jumping Frog" alone will be remembered.

Barry Dave


Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.

Barry Dave


The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work.

Barry Dave


You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it true. You may have to work for it, however.

Barry Dave


There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope.

Barry Dave


Work is the crab grass in the lawn of life.

Barry Dave


I will make you shorter by the head.

Barry Dave


Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.

Barry Dave


Language is a virus from another planet.

Barry Dave


In this world, nothing is certain but death and taxes.

Barry Dave


If what they've been doing hasn't solved the problem, tell them to do something else.

Barry Dave


Human resources are human first, and resources second.

Barry Dave


If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.

Barry Dave


Roumanian-Yiddish cooking has killed more Jews than Hitler.

Barry Dave


In "King Henry VI, Part II," Shakespeare has Dick Butcher suggest to his fellow anti-establishment rabble-rousers, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." That action may be extreme but a similar sentiment was expressed by Thomas K. Co

Barry Dave


There is always something new out of Africa.

Barry Dave


To generalize is to be an idiot.

Barry Dave


I am, in point of fact, a particularly haughty and exclusive person, of pre-Adamite ancestral descent. You will understand this when I tell you that I can trace my ancestry back to a protoplasmal primordial atomic globule. Consequently, my family p

Barry Dave


Mirrors should reflect a little before throwing back images.

Barry Dave


Seeing that death, a necessary end, Will come when it will come.

Barry Dave


Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.

Barry Dave


... [concerning quotation marks] even if we *___did* quote anybody in this business, it probably would be gibberish.

Barry Dave


A little bit of rape is good for a man's soul.

Barry Dave


All art is but imitation of nature.

Barry Dave


We have art that we do not die of the truth.

Barry Dave


Generally speaking, the Way of the warrior is resolute acceptance of death.

Barry Dave


My dear People. My dear Bagginses and Boffins, and my dear Tooks and Brandybucks, and Grubbs, and Chubbs, and Burrowses, and Hornblowers, and Bolgers, Bracegirdles, Goodbodies, Brockhouses and Proudfoots. Also my good Sackville Bagginses that I w

Barry Dave


Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.

Barry Dave


The Israelis are the Doberman pinschers of the Middle East. They treat the Arabs like postmen.

Barry Dave


The state of innocence contains the germs of all future sin.

Barry Dave


What fools these mortals be.

Barry Dave


Too much is just enough.

Barry Dave


Think lucky. If you fall in a pond, check your pockets for fish.

Barry Dave


Nasrudin returned to his village from the imperial capital, and the villagers gathered around to hear what had passed. "At this time," said Nasrudin, "I only want to say that the King spoke to me." All the villagers but the stupidest ran off to spr

Barry Dave


Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten.

Barry Dave


The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence.

Barry Dave


Well, the handwriting is on the floor.

Barry Dave


Ignorance is never out of style. It was in fashion yesterday, it is the rage today, and it will set the pace tomorrow.

Barry Dave


They can't stop us... we're on a mission from God!

Barry Dave


were found to be wearing neckwear that was tighter than their neck circumference. The visual discrimination of the 22 subjects was evaluated using a critical flicker frequency (CFF) test. Results of the CFF test indicated that tight neckwear signifi

Barry Dave


There is much Obi-Wan did not tell you.

Barry Dave


Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.

Barry Dave


I'll burn my books.

Barry Dave


Even the best of friends cannot attend each other's funeral.

Barry Dave


There's no justice in this world.

Barry Dave


Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket.

Barry Dave


He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.

Barry Dave


Patch griefs with proverbs.

Barry Dave


If one inquires why the American tradition is so strong against any connection of State and Church, why it dreads even the rudiments of religious teaching in state-maintained schools, the immediate and superficial answer is not far to seek. ... The

Butler Dave


Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success.

Dave


I remember when legal used to mean lawful, now it means some kind of loophole.

Dave Barry


Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it.

Johnson Dave


If little green men land in your back yard, hide any little green women you've got in the house.

Millman Dave


You can't run away forever, But there's nothing wrong with getting a good head start.

Parnas Dave


He that breaks a thing to find out what it is has left the path of wisdom.

Thomas Dave


Sho' they got to have it against the law. Shoot, ever'body git high, they wouldn't be nobody git up and feed the chickens. Hee-hee.

de Dave Johnson on





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[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a
Barry Dave

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Dave
 
 
 
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