I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.

You give me space to belong to myself yet without separating me from your own life. May it all turn out to your happiness.

A committee takes root and grows, it flowers, wilts and dies, scattering the seed from which other committees will bloom.

The older I grow, the less important the comma becomes. Let the reader catch his own breath.

Capitalism is the extraordinary belief that the nastiest of men, for the nastiest of reasons, will somehow work for the benefit of us all.

The ideal voice for radio may be defined as showing no substance, no sex, no owner, and a message of importance for every housewife.

Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational.

Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.

One, with God, is always a majority, but many a martyr has been burned at the stake while the votes were being counted.

Facts are the enemy of truth.

The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself.

It is the business of the future to be dangerous.

The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet.

A word to the wise is enough.

If a guru falls in the forest with no one to hear him, was he really a guru at all?

A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him.

Writing is turning one's worst moments into money.

Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.

If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know.

To stay young requires unceasing cultivation of the ability to unlearn old falsehoods.

The Least Successful Equal Pay Advertisement In 1976 the European Economic Community pointed out to the Irish Government that it had not yet implemented the agreed sex equality legislation. The Dublin Government immediately advertised for an equal

Show business is just like high school, except you get paid.

"I don't mind going nowhere as long as it's an interesting path."

To restore a sense of reality, I think Walt Disney should have a Hardluckland.

Living in LA is like not having a date on Saturday night.