Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you'll be surprised at how little you have.

He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world as he who is ready to die.

For fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

A man said to the Universe: "Sir, I exist!" "However," replied the Universe, "the fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."

You cannot see the wood for the trees.

"Cogito ergo I'm right and you're wrong."

Before he became a hermit, Zarathud was a young Priest, and took great delight in making fools of his opponents in front of his followers. One day Zarathud took his students to a pleasant pasture and there he confronted The Sacred Chao while She

The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.

Ask not for whom the Bell tolls, and you will pay only the station-to-station rate.

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.

It is through symbols that man consciously or unconsciously lives, works and has his being.

Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts.

Save the Whales

Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.

If you are shooting under 80 you are neglecting your business; over 80 you are neglecting your golf.

With all the talent around, it's sort of amazing that a woman could be up here with us.

Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.

Men freely believe that what they wish to desire.

The superfluous is very necessary.

If you want divine justice, die.

Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless.

"Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich."

In the long run we are all dead.

If you sell diamonds, you cannot expect to have many customers. But a diamond is a diamond even if there are no customers.

We were so poor we couldn't afford a watchdog. If we heard a noise at night, we'd bark ourselves.

An aphorism is never exactly true; it is either a half-truth or one-and-a-half truths.

A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I believe everything positively stinks.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

What you want, what you're hanging around in the world waiting for, is for something to occur to you.

Exceptions prove the rule, and wreck the budget.

To add insult to injury.

If I were a grave-digger or even a hangman, there are some people I could work for with a great deal of enjoyment.