The Soviet Union, which has complained recently about alleged anti-Soviet themes in American advertising, lodged an official protest this week against the Ford Motor Company's new campaign: "Hey you stinking, fat Russian, get off my Ford Escort."

To lead people, you must follow behind.

If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

"Life is too important to take seriously."

If you're like most homeowners, you're afraid that many repairs around your home are too difficult to tackle. So, when your furnace explodes, you call in a so-called professional to fix it. The "professional" arrives in a truck with lettering on t

Any stone in your boot always migrates against the pressure gradient to exactly the point of most pressure.

XLI: The more one produces, the less one gets. XLII: Simple systems are not feasible because they require infinite testing. XLIII: Hardware works best when it matters the least. XLIV: Aircraft flight in the 21st century will always be in a we

He hath eaten me out of house and home.

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

I always wake up at the crack of ice.

There are ten or twenty basic truths, and life is the process of discovering them over and over and over.

By protracting life, we do not deduct one jot from the duration of death.

It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. T

A woman who is unfaithful deserves to be shot.

Getting kicked out of the American Bar Association is liked getting kicked out of the Book-of-the-Month Club.

Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.

With her body, woman is more sincere than man; but with her mind she lies. And when she lies, she does not believe herself.

Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else; this is not advice, it is merely custom.

A racially integrated community is a chronological term timed from the entrance of the first black family to the exit of the last white family.

God gave man two ears and one tongue so that we listen twice as much as we speak.

Traveling through hyperspace isn't like dusting crops, boy.

Whatever occurs from love is always beyond good and evil.

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.

Monterey... is decidedly the pleasantest and most civilized-looking place in California ... [it] is also a great place for cock-fighting, gambling of all sorts, fandangos, and various kinds of amusements and knavery.

It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

Life is like a 10 speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.

If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animals. Some of their most esteemed inventions have no other apparent purpose, for example, the dinner party of more than two, the epic poem, and the

Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational.

Things are more like they are today than they ever were before.

Mate, this parrot wouldn't VOOM if you put four million volts through it!

I always had a repulsive need to be something more than human.