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All the really good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow.

Bach J.S.

There are people who find it odd to eat four or five Chinese meals in a row; in China, I often remind them, there are a billion or so people who find nothing odd about it.

Burroughs William S.

Nothing is more admirable than the fortitude with which millionaires tolerate the disadvantages of their wealth.

Eliot T.S.

When in doubt, mumble; when in trouble, delegate; when in charge, ponder.

Eliot T.S.

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Eliot T.S.

The truth is rarely pure, and never simple.

Gilbert W.S.

Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Harper Lucille S.

God help those who do not help themselves.

Hayakawa S.I.

Catharsis is something I associate with pornography and crossword puzzles.

Hunter S. Thompson

I didn't do it! Nobody saw me do it! Can't prove anything!

Johnson S.

After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven. As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created." "This is true," He replied.

Kaufman George S.

Time goes, you say? Ah no! Time stays, *we* go.

Kierkegaard S.

Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for even the greatest fool may ask more the the wisest man can answer.

Knapp R.S.

For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex.

Koblas G.S.

Learning French is trivial: the word for horse is cheval, and everything else follows in the same way.

Krabill W.S.

In the olden days in England, you could be hung for stealing a sheep or a loaf of bread. However, if a sheep stole a loaf of bread and gave it to you, you would only be tried for receiving, a crime punishable by forty lashes with the cat or the dog,

Lewis C.S.

Think lucky. If you fall in a pond, check your pockets for fish.

Lewis C.S.

The cart has no place where a fifth wheel could be used.

Maugham W.S.

It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

Perelman S.J.

According to my best recollection, I don't remember.

S. Paige

[Maturity consists in the discovery that] there comes a critical moment where everything is reversed, after which the point becomes to understand more and more that there is something which cannot be understood.

Surtees R.S.

Honesty's the best policy.

T.S. Eliot

The big cities of America are becoming Third World countries.

Thompson Dr. Hunter S.

There is no fool to the old fool.

Thompson Dr. Hunter S.

IF I HAD A MINE SHAFT, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.

Thompson H.S.

Littering is dumb.

Thompson Hunter S.

I went to a Grateful Dead Concert and they played for SEVEN hours. Great song.

Thompson Hunter S.

The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet.

Truman Harry S.

Those who educate children well are more to be honored than parents, for these only gave life, those the art of living well.

Truman Harry S.

Mundus vult decipi decipiatur ergo.

Truman Harry S.

If it were thought that anything I wrote was influenced by Robert Frost, I would take that particular work of mine, shred it, and flush it down the toilet, hoping not to clog the pipes. A more sententious, holding- forth old bore who expected every

Truman Harry S.

It's all right letting yourself go as long as you can let yourself back.

Truman President Harry S.

I stick my neck out for nobody.

William S. Paley

What soon grows old? Gratitude.

regulations. check your security

Random Quote

One thing I have no worry about is whether God exists. But it has occurred to me that God has Alzheimer's and has forgotten we exist.
Jane Wagner

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
S. Paige
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