If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

"If a camel flies, no one laughs if it doesn't get very far."

They can't stop us... we're on a mission from God!

All is well that ends well.

The only thing that experience teaches us is that experience teaches us nothing.

Three o'clock in the afternoon is always just a little too late or a little too early for anything you want to do.

The chief enemy of creativity is "good" sense

A sinking ship gathers no moss.

Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius; will you remember to pay the debt?

So little time, so little to do.

If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish.

Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamp-post how it feels about dogs.

You climb to reach the summit, but once there, discover that all roads lead down.

Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery, or simple bad luck.

A woman's a woman until the day she dies, but a man's only a man as long as he can.

One big pile is better than two little piles.

"Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing."

My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I threw my amplifier out the dormitory window. We did not act in haste. First we checked to make sure the amplifier would fit through the frame, using the belt from my bathrobe to meas

There is no better way of exercising the imagination than the study of law. No poet ever interpreted nature as freely as a lawyer interprets truth.

Whatever doesn't succeed in two months and a half in California will never succeed.

If you want to know what god thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless.

In the highest society, as well as in the lowest, woman is merely an instrument of pleasure.

The only "ism" Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.

A man said to the Universe: "Sir, I exist!" "However," replied the Universe, "the fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."

[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Genius is pain.