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Sorry 'bout that sweat, honey. That's just holy water.

Allen Woody


Dear Mister Language Person: What is the purpose of the apostrophe? Answer: The apostrophe is used mainly in hand-lettered small business signs to alert the reader than an "S" is coming up at the end of a word, as in: WE DO NOT EXCEPT PERSONAL CHEC

Allen Woody


Dying is easy. Comedy is difficult.

Allen Woody


A snake lurks in the grass.

Allen Woody


If I could reach, I'd never leave the house.

Allen Woody


He who despairs over an event is a coward, but he who holds hopes for the human condition is a fool.

Allen Woody


A critic is a bundle of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste.

Allen Woody


Don't go to bed with no price on your head.

Allen Woody


Littering is dumb.

Allen Woody


He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.

Allen Woody


A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature replaces it with.

Allen Woody


Let sleeping dogs lie.

Allen Woody


If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death. If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law? There is always an official executioner. If

Allen Woody


What we need in this country, instead of Daylight Savings Time, which nobody really understands anyway, is a new concept called Weekday Morning Time, whereby at 7 a.m. every weekday we go into a space-launch-style "hold" for two to three hours, durin

Allen Woody


The 'A' is for content, the 'minus' is for not typing it. Don't ever do this to my eyes again.

Allen Woody


Just remember, wherever you go, there you are.

Allen Woody


Where there is much light there is also much shadow.

Allen Woody


One good turn deserves another.

Woody Allen


Most general statements are false, including this one.

Woody Allen


There is a good deal of solemn cant about the common interests of capital and labour. As matters stand, their only common interest is that of cutting each other's throat.

Woody Allen





Random Quote


Evil is that which one believes of others. It is a sin to believe evil of others, but it is seldom a mistake.
Mencken H.L.

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Allen Woody
 
 
 
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