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When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

Barry Dave


What luck for the rulers that men do not think.

Barry Dave


We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stay there, lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again - and that is well; but also she will never

Barry Dave


Being a woman is a terribly difficult trade, since it consists principally of dealings with men.

Barry Dave


"Spare no expense to save money on this one."

Barry Dave


... before I could come to any conclusion it occurred to me that my speech or my silence, indeed any action of mine, would be a mere futility. What did it matter what anyone knew or ignored? What did it matter who was manager? One gets sometimes s

Barry Dave


The absurd is the essential concept and the first truth.

Barry Dave


Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

Barry Dave


Events are not affected, they develop.

Barry Dave


War is much too serious a matter to be entrusted to the military.

Barry Dave


I never deny, I never contradict. I sometimes forget.

Barry Dave


It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.

Barry Dave


Yet creeds mean very little, Coth answered the dark god, still speaking almost gently. The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.

Barry Dave


Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.

Barry Dave


You can't depend on the man who made the mess to clean it up.

Barry Dave


Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.

Barry Dave


The only happiness lies in reason; all the rest of the world is dismal. The highest reason, however, I see in the work of the artist, and he may experience it as such. Happiness lies in the swiftness of feeling and thinking: all the rest of the worl

Barry Dave


Politics are almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous. In war, you can only be killed once.

Barry Dave


We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.

Barry Dave


Young men, hear an old man to whom old men hearkened when he was young.

Barry Dave


I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all Three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach. Oh, tell me that I may s

Barry Dave


By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve.

Barry Dave


For courage mounteth with occasion.

Barry Dave


You won't skid if you stay in a rut.

Barry Dave


A highly intelligent man should take a primitive woman. Imagine if on top of everything else, I had a woman who interfered with my work.

Barry Dave


Every cloud engenders not a storm.

Barry Dave


In every country and every age, the priest has been hostile to Liberty.

Barry Dave


There's small choice in rotten apples.

Barry Dave


The ripest fruit falls first.

Barry Dave


I will make you shorter by the head.

Barry Dave


What a bonanza! An unknown beginner to be directed by Lubitsch, in a script by Wilder and Brackett, and to play with Paramount's two superstars, Gary Cooper and Claudette Colbert, and to be beaten up by both of them!

Barry Dave


We are going to give a little something, a few little years more, to socialism, because socialism is defunct. It dies all by itself. The bad thing is that socialism, being a victim of its ... Did I say socialism?

Barry Dave


Scrubbing floors and emptying bedpans has as much dignity as the Presidency.

Barry Dave


A is for Apple.

Barry Dave


The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Barry Dave


Let me take you a button-hole lower.

Barry Dave


When I came back to Dublin I was courtmartialed in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.

Barry Dave


God was satisfied with his own work, and that is fatal.

Barry Dave


It is a wise father that knows his own child.

Barry Dave


Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.

Barry Dave


It is your concern when your neighbor's wall is on fire.

Barry Dave


When in doubt, use brute force.

Barry Dave


Time as he grows old teaches all things.

Barry Dave


Prizes are for children.

Barry Dave


He who fears the unknown may one day flee from his own backside.

Barry Dave


The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet.

Barry Dave


The early bird who catches the worm works for someone who comes in late and owns the worm farm.

Barry Dave


Every country has the government it deserves.

Barry Dave


There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

Barry Dave


"You can't survive by sucking the juice from a wet mitten."

Dave Barry





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He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others.
Johnson Samuel

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Barry Dave
 
 
 
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