The proof of the pudding is in the eating.

If a guru falls in the forest with no one to hear him, was he really a guru at all?

A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that balances are correct.

"Are you police officers?" "No, ma'am. We're musicians."

He that teaches himself has a fool for a master.

A society in which women are taught anything but the management of a family, the care of men, and the creation of the future generation is a society which is on its way out.

I hate quotations.

Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.

Getting into trouble is easy.

The truth is rarely pure, and never simple.

If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death. If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law? There is always an official executioner. If

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.

The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work.

[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

The first rule of all intelligent tinkering is to keep all the parts.

We're all in this alone.

The flush toilet is the basis of Western civilization.

The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.

The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence.

Life sucks, but death doesn't put out at all.

In the long run we are all dead.

Pauca sed matura. [Few but excellent.]

The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.

Sweet April showers do spring May flowers.

It's not easy, being green.

I need another lawyer like I need another hole in my head.

Bingo, gas station, hamburger with a side order of airplane noise, and you'll be Gary, Indiana.

It is better to have loved and lost

Ignorance is never out of style. It was in fashion yesterday, it is the rage today, and it will set the pace tomorrow.

We have reason to be afraid. This is a terrible place.

Who goeth a-borrowing goeth a-sorrowing.

I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

If you want to know what god thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

What I tell you three times is true.

The last thing one knows in constructing a work is what to put first.

Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best.

My only love sprung from my only hate! Too early seen unknown, and known too late!

Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

If you wish to be happy for one hour, get drunk. If you wish to be happy for three days, get married. If you wish to be happy for a month, kill your pig and eat it. If you wish to be happy forever, learn to fish.

Never have so many understood so little about so much.

[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

A word to the wise is enough.

That's no moon...

The man who has never been flogged has never been taught.

There are ten or twenty basic truths, and life is the process of discovering them over and over and over.

A woman who is guided by the head and not by the heart is a social pestilence: she has all the defects of the passionate and affectionate woman, with none of her compensations; she is without pity, without love, without virtue, without sex.

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?