She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

Many of the characters are fools and they are always playing tricks on me and treating me badly.

Fourteen years in the professor dodge has taught me that one can argue ingeniously on behalf of any theory, applied to any piece of literature. This is rarely harmful, because normally no-one reads such essays.

Lay off the muses, it's a very tough dollar.

San Francisco isn't what it used to be, and it never was.

Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game - it, and high taxes.

"There was an interesting development in the CBS-Westmoreland trial: both sides agreed that after the trial, Andy Rooney would be allowed to talk to the jury for three minutes about little things that annoyed him during the trial."