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The man who has never been flogged has never been taught.

Churchill W.


I hate dying.

Churchill Winston


Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational.

Churchill Winston


Beggars should be no choosers.

Churchill Winston


The ideal voice for radio may be defined as showing no substance, no sex, no owner, and a message of importance for every housewife.

Churchill Winston


"Hey, Sam, how about a loan?" "Whattaya need?" "Oh, about $500." "Whattaya got for collateral?" "Whattaya need?" "How about an eye?"

Churchill Winston


Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Churchill Winston


"Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing."

Churchill Winston


You may have heard that a dean is to faculty as a hydrant is to a dog.

Churchill Winston


Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else; this is not advice, it is merely custom.

Churchill Winston


Art is either plagiarism or revolution.

Churchill Winston


If Christianity was morality, Socrates would be the Saviour.

Churchill Winston


Murray and Esther, a middle-aged Jewish couple, are touring Chile. Murray just got a new camera and is constantly snapping pictures. One day, without knowing it, he photographs a top-secret military installation. In an instant, armed troops surroun

Churchill Winston


Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

Churchill Winston


So she went into the garden to cut a cabbage leaf to make an apple pie; and at the same time a great she-bear, coming up the street pops its head into the shop. "What! no soap?" So he died, and she very imprudently married the barber; and there were

Churchill Winston


Repartee is something we think of twenty-four hours too late.

Churchill Winston


Unless hours were cups of sack, and minutes capons, and clocks the tongues of bawds, and dials the signs of leaping houses, and the blessed sun himself a fair, hot wench in flame-colored taffeta, I see no reason why thou shouldst be so superfluous to

Churchill W.


The error of youth is to believe that intelligence is a substitute for experience, while the error of age is to believe experience is a substitute for intelligence.

Churchill W.


No is no negative in a woman's mouth.

Churchill Winston


per year.

Churchill Winston


When I saw a sign on the freeway that said, "Los Angeles 445 miles," I said to myself, "I've got to get out of this lane."

Churchill Winston


Mandrell: "You know what I think?" Doctor: "Ah, ah that's a catch question. With a brain your size you don't think, right?"

Churchill Winston





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A statesman is a politician who's been dead 10 or 15 years.
Truman Harry S.

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Churchill W
 
 
 
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