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What one believes to be true either is true or becomes true.

Barry Dave


Drop the vase and it will become a Ming of the past.

Barry Dave


A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.

Barry Dave


Money doesn't talk, it swears.

Barry Dave


The first requisite for immortality is death.

Barry Dave


"Every morning, I get up and look through the 'Forbes' list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work"

Barry Dave


What does not destroy me, makes me stronger.

Barry Dave


Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.

Barry Dave


Pereant, inquit, qui ante nos nostra dixerunt. [Confound those who have said our remarks before us.] or [May they perish who have expressed our bright ideas before us.]

Barry Dave


The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work.

Barry Dave


It is the quality rather than the quantity that matters.

Barry Dave


Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

Barry Dave


I remember when legal used to mean lawful, now it means some kind of loophole.

Barry Dave


Everything takes longer, costs more, and is less useful.

Barry Dave


If while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment market is glutted.

Barry Dave


Then, gently touching my face, she hesitated for a moment as her incredible eyes poured forth into mine love, joy, pain, tragedy, acceptance, and peace. "'Bye for now," she said warmly.

Barry Dave


The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.

Barry Dave


One picture is worth more than ten thousand words.

Barry Dave


A woman employs sincerity only when every other form of deception has failed.

Barry Dave


Look, we trade every day out there with hustlers, deal-makers, shysters, con-men. That's the way businesses get started. That's the way this country was built.

Barry Dave


Life sucks, but death doesn't put out at all.

Barry Dave


A word to the wise is enough.

Barry Dave


A commune is where people join together to share their lack of wealth.

Barry Dave


Some men are heterosexual, and some are bisexual, and some men don't think about sex at all... they become lawyers.

Barry Dave


Genius is pain.

Barry Dave


Being a miner, as soon as you're too old and tired and sick and stupid to do your job properly, you have to go, where the very opposite applies with the judges.

Barry Dave


There's no justice in this world.

Barry Dave


Those who educate children well are more to be honored than parents, for these only gave life, those the art of living well.

Barry Dave


My father, a good man, told me, "Never lose your ignorance; you cannot replace it."

Barry Dave


Barry Dave


A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back the when it begins to rain.

Barry Dave


If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death. If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law? There is always an official executioner. If

Barry Dave


The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness.

Barry Dave


No good deed goes unpunished.

Barry Dave


I'm glad I was not born before tea.

Barry Dave


A man's house is his castle.

Barry Dave


There is no better way of exercising the imagination than the study of law. No poet ever interpreted nature as freely as a lawyer interprets truth.

Barry Dave


Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

Barry Dave


Optimism is the content of small men in high places.

Barry Dave


Dignity is like a flag. It flaps in a storm.

Barry Dave


Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.

Barry Dave


Every man who has reached even his intellectual teens begins to suspect that life is no farce; that it is not genteel comedy even; that it flowers and fructifies on the contrary out of the profoundest tragic depths of the essential death in which its

Barry Dave


Facts are the enemy of truth.

Barry Dave


The only reward of virtue is virtue.

Barry Dave


For fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

Barry Dave


The best you get is an even break.

Barry Dave


Those who do things in a noble spirit of self-sacrifice are to be avoided at all costs.

Barry Dave


Without adventure, civilization is in full decay.

Barry Dave


Nothing will dispel enthusiasm like a small admission fee.

Barry Dave


L'hazard ne favorise que l'esprit prepare.

Dave Barry





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Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.
Bankhead Tallulah

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Dave Barry
 
 
 
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