A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

There are no accidents whatsoever in the universe.

If I were a grave-digger or even a hangman, there are some people I could work for with a great deal of enjoyment.

I consider a new device or technology to have been culturally accepted when it has been used to commit a murder.

I need another lawyer like I need another hole in my head.

Illusion is the first of all pleasures.

I understand why you're confused. You're thinking too much.

Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art.

I will make you shorter by the head.

It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.

The only really good place to buy lumber is at a store where the lumber has already been cut and attached together in the form of furniture, finished, and put inside boxes.

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.

Zero Mostel: That's it baby! When you got it, flaunt it! Flaunt it!

Let the people think they govern and they will be governed.