Money doesn't talk, it swears.

If while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment market is glutted.

Truth never comes into the world but like a bastard, to the ignominy of him that brought her birth.

After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven. As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created." "This is true," He replied.

Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them.

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.

Three o'clock in the afternoon is always just a little too late or a little too early for anything you want to do.

With her body, woman is more sincere than man; but with her mind she lies. And when she lies, she does not believe herself.

Absolutum obsoletum. (If it works, it's out of date.)

Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will someday become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves.

American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees be honest and hardworking. It has even stopped hoping for employees who are educated enough that they can tell the difference between the men's room and the women's room with

"You've got to have a gimmick if your band sucks."

Certain passages in several laws have always defied interpretation and the most inexplicable must be a matter of opinion. A judge of the Court of Session of Scotland has sent the editors of this book his candidate which reads, "In the Nuts (unground

"We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!"

The ratio of literacy to illiteracy is a constant, but nowadays the illiterates can read.

I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish.

The more the merrier.

... before I could come to any conclusion it occurred to me that my speech or my silence, indeed any action of mine, would be a mere futility. What did it matter what anyone knew or ignored? What did it matter who was manager? One gets sometimes s

Doctors and lawyers must go to school for years and years, often with little sleep and with great sacrifice to their first wives.

Kindness is the beginning of cruelty.

Good-bye. I am leaving because I am bored.

A woman employs sincerity only when every other form of deception has failed.

Nonsense and beauty have close connections.

... "fire" does not matter, "earth" and "air" and "water" do not matter. "I" do not matter. No word matters. But man forgets reality and remembers words. The more words he remembers, the cleverer do his fellows esteem him. He looks upon the great

Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

"Whom are you?" said he, for he had been to night school.

Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.

In breeding cattle you need one bull for every twenty-five cows, unless the cows are known sluts.

A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature replaces it with.

Facts, apart from their relationships, are like labels on empty bottles.

An atom-blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.

A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.

This is the sort of English up with which I will not put.

Generally speaking, the Way of the warrior is resolute acceptance of death.

Many hands make light work.

There are ten or twenty basic truths, and life is the process of discovering them over and over and over.

Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.

In spite of everything, I still believe that people are good at heart.

If you're like most homeowners, you're afraid that many repairs around your home are too difficult to tackle. So, when your furnace explodes, you call in a so-called professional to fix it. The "professional" arrives in a truck with lettering on t

To teach is to learn twice.

The time spent on any item of the agenda [of a finance committee] will be in inverse proportion to the sum involved.

Arrakis teaches the attitude of the knife - chopping off what's incomplete and saying: "Now it's complete because it's ended here."

The coast was clear.

No one born with a mouth and a need is "innocent".

Where it is a duty to worship the sun it is pretty sure to be a crime to examine the laws of heat.

After the game the king and the pawn go in the same box.

He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world as he who is ready to die.

Human resources are human first, and resources second.

Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Sweet April showers do spring May flowers.

Live fast, die young, and leave a flat patch of fur on the highway!

Never have so many understood so little about so much.

A witty saying proves nothing.

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.

Educational television should be absolutely forbidden. It can only lead to unreasonable disappointment when your child discovers that the letters of the alphabet do not leap up out of books and dance around with royal-blue chickens.

God was satisfied with his own work, and that is fatal.

The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Education is learning what you didn't even know you didn't know.

Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

One learns to itch where one can scratch.

It's easier to take it apart than to put it back together.

You can tell the ideals of a nation by its advertisements.

Better tried by twelve than carried by six.

The lawgiver, of all beings, most owes the law allegiance. He of all men should behave as though the law compelled him. But it is the universal weakness of mankind that what we are given to administer we presently imagine we own.

per year.

Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.

A good name lost is seldom regained. When character is gone, all is gone, and one of the richest jewels of life is lost forever.

In a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence ... in time every post tends to be occupied by an employee who is incompetent to carry out its duties ... Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their

Money is truthful. If a man speaks of his honor, make him pay cash.

Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.

Charity begins at home.

It is the quality rather than the quantity that matters.

Mental power tended to corrupt, and absolute intelligence tended to corrupt absolutely, until the victim eschewed violence entirely in favor of smart solutions to stupid problems.

That Xanthippe's husband should have become so great a philosopher is remarkable. Amid all the scolding, to be able to think! But he could not write: that was impossible. Socrates has not left us a single book.

Sic transit gloria mundi. [So passes away the glory of this world.]

In childhood a woman must be subject to her father; in youth to her husband; when her husband is dead, to her sons. A woman must never be free of subjugation.

While there's life, there's hope.

Perfection is reached, not when there is no longer anything to add, but when there is no longer anything to take away.

Better late than never.

Divorce is a game played by lawyers.

Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.

Feminists say 60 percent of the country's wealth is in the hands of women. They're letting men hold the other 40 percent because their handbags are full.

Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming.

"I'm dying," he croaked. "My experiment was a success," the chemist retorted . "You can't really train a beagle," he dogmatized. "That's no beagle, it's a mongrel," she muttered. "The fire is going out," he bellowed. "Bad marksmanship," the h

Let us not look back in anger or forward in fear, but around us in awareness.

Traveling through hyperspace isn't like dusting crops, boy.

Mother is far too clever to understand anything she does not like.

Fortune's Guide to Freshman Notetaking: WHEN THE PROFESSOR SAYS: YOU WRITE: Probably the greatest quality of the poetry John Milton

If a shameless woman expects to be defiled and then dies of her fierce love because you do not consent, will chastity also be homicide?

Some men are heterosexual, and some are bisexual, and some men don't think about sex at all... they become lawyers.

He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.

The most costly of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true. It is the chief occupation of mankind.

Why be a man when you can be a success?

Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths good theatre.

Music in the soul can be heard by the universe.

How do you explain school to a higher intelligence?

A commune is where people join together to share their lack of wealth.

The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech.

We'll be recording at the Paradise Friday night. Live, on the Death label.

Scratch the average female and you'll find a purring bundle... at the ready to love and honor, bake a torte and still produce quintuplets.

If you sell diamonds, you cannot expect to have many customers. But a diamond is a diamond even if there are no customers.

It has long been noticed that juries are pitiless for robbery and full of indulgence for infanticide. A question of interest, my dear Sir! The jury is afraid of being robbed and has passed the age when it could be a victim of infanticide.

Woman is generally so bad that the difference between a good and a bad woman scarcely exists.

I always wake up at the crack of ice.

Either I'm dead or my watch has stopped.

The problem that we thought was a problem was, indeed, a problem, but not the problem we thought was the problem.

The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

Have the courage to take your own thoughts seriously, for they will shape you.

The best you get is an even break.

Who dat who say "who dat" when I say "who dat"?

It is sweet to let the mind unbend on occasion.

When the English language gets in my way, I walk over it.

After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven. As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created." "This is true," He replied.

Unprovided with original learning, unformed in the habits of thinking, unskilled in the arts of composition, I resolved to write a book.

Perhaps the remembrance of these things will prove a source of future pleasure.

I remember when legal used to mean lawful, now it means some kind of loophole.

Dear Mister Language Person: What is the purpose of the apostrophe? Answer: The apostrophe is used mainly in hand-lettered small business signs to alert the reader than an "S" is coming up at the end of a word, as in: WE DO NOT EXCEPT PERSONAL CHEC

Never promise more than you can perform.

Any two philosophers can tell each other all they know in two hours.

The most difficult thing in the world is to know how to do a thing and to watch someone else doing it wrong, without commenting.

There are two kinds of pedestrians... the quick and the dead.

Work is of two kinds: first, altering the position of matter at or near the earth's surface relative to other matter; second, telling other people to do so.

When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money.

I'll turn over a new leaf.

... Our second completely true news item was sent to me by Mr. H. Boyce Connell Jr. of Atlanta, Ga., where he is involved in a law firm. One thing I like about the South is, folks there care about tradition. If somebody gets handed a name like "H.

Let sleeping dogs lie.

If there is no wind, row.

The sunlights differ, but there is only one darkness.

A word to the wise is enough.

Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.

The superfluous is very necessary.

You cannot see the wood for the trees.

A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.

Some women should be beaten regularly, like gongs.

A dream will always triumph over reality, once it is given the chance.

To accuse others for one's own misfortunes is a sign of want of education. To accuse oneself shows that one's education has begun. To accuse neither oneself nor others shows that one's education is complete.

If any man wishes to be humbled and mortified, let him become president of Harvard.

If a fool persists in his folly he shall become wise.

A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.

When you make your mark in the world, watch out for guys with erasers.

Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.

Use what talents you possess: the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best.

There is no better way of exercising the imagination than the study of law. No poet ever interpreted nature as freely as a lawyer interprets truth.

A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation. It takes an abundance of imagination, to be sure.

He that composes himself is wiser than he that composes a book.

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased.

Only those who leisurely approach that which the masses are busy about can be busy about that which the masses take leisurely.

Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

The pollution's at that awkward stage. Too thick to navigate and too thin to cultivate.

If I love you, what business is it of yours?

Reality is just a convenient measure of complexity.

Hard reality has a way of cramping your style.

General notions are generally wrong.

A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

Optimism is the content of small men in high places.

"Cogito ergo I'm right and you're wrong."

If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

Events are not affected, they develop.

Rotten wood cannot be carved.

Life is one long struggle in the dark.

I've got all the money I'll ever need if I die by 4 o'clock.

There is more to life than increasing its speed.

Moneyliness is next to Godliness.

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

Nothing is more admirable than the fortitude with which millionaires tolerate the disadvantages of their wealth.

If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

There is no fool to the old fool.

Like, if I'm not for me, then fer shure, like who will be? And if, y'know, if I'm not like fer anyone else, then hey, I mean, what am I? And if not now, like I dunno, maybe like when? And if not Who, then I dunno, maybe like the Rolling Stones?

"The chain which can be yanked is not the eternal chain."

All phone calls are obscene.

The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Si jeunesse savait, si vieillesse pouvait. [If youth but knew, if old age but could.]

Naked children have never played in _o_u_r fountains, and I.M. Pei will never be happy on Route 66.

Once he had one leg in the White House and the nation trembled under his roars. Now he is a tinpot pope in the Coca-Cola belt and a brother to the forlorn pastors who belabor halfwits in galvanized iron tabernacles behind the railroad yards."

The two most beautiful words in the English language are "Cheque Enclosed."

The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

Life would be tolerable but for its amusements.

You can fool all the people all of the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough.

I remember when legal used to mean lawful, now it means some kind of loophole.

Exceptions prove the rule, and wreck the budget.

She applies her lipstick in spite of its contents: "greasy rouge, containing crushed and dried insect corpses for coloring, beeswax for stiffness, and olive oil to help it flow - the latter having the unfortunate tendency to go rancid several hours a

"The jig's up, Elman." "Which jig?"

Somehow I reached excess without ever noticing when I was passing through satisfaction.

The sky is blue so we know where to stop mowing.

A priest asked: What is Fate, Master? And the Master answered: It is that which gives a beast of burden its reason for existence. It is that which men in former times had to bear upon their backs. It is that which has caused nations to build bywa

No excellent soul is exempt from a mixture of madness.

Some scholars are like donkeys, they merely carry a lot of books.

Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine.

Maternity pay? Now every Tom, Dick and Harry will get pregnant.

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.

The individual choice of garnishment of a burger can be an important point to the consumer in this day when individualism is an increasingly important thing to people.

The only happiness lies in reason; all the rest of the world is dismal. The highest reason, however, I see in the work of the artist, and he may experience it as such. Happiness lies in the swiftness of feeling and thinking: all the rest of the worl

Credit ... is the only enduring testimonial to man's confidence in man.

Fourteen years in the professor dodge has taught me that one can argue ingeniously on behalf of any theory, applied to any piece of literature. This is rarely harmful, because normally no-one reads such essays.

"Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet. As you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney. Do you have a car or a job? Do you ever

Good salesmen and good repairmen will never go hungry.

There's no justice in this world.

The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.

Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

If you know the answer to a question, don't ask.

Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.

America, I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel.

Just remember, wherever you go, there you are.

This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but to be hurled with great force.

Every word is like an unnecessary stain on silence and nothingness.

Pereant, inquit, qui ante nos nostra dixerunt. [Confound those who have said our remarks before us.] or [May they perish who have expressed our bright ideas before us.]

You climb to reach the summit, but once there, discover that all roads lead down.

Life is the living you do, Death is the living you don't do.

A man said to the Universe: "Sir, I exist!" "However," replied the Universe, "the fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."

A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I believe everything positively stinks.

Who does not trust enough will not be trusted.

The real purpose of books is to trap the mind into doing its own thinking.

I'm glad I was not born before tea.

There are no accidents whatsoever in the universe.

If you aren't rich you should always look useful.

I'm always looking for a new idea that will be more productive than its cost.

Comparing information and knowledge is like asking whether the fatness of a pig is more or less green than the designated hitter rule."

What a bonanza! An unknown beginner to be directed by Lubitsch, in a script by Wilder and Brackett, and to play with Paramount's two superstars, Gary Cooper and Claudette Colbert, and to be beaten up by both of them!

A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.

Don't go to bed with no price on your head.

"What's the use of a good quotation if you can't change it?"

If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

History is nothing but a collection of fables and useless trifles, cluttered up with a mass of unnecessary figures and proper names.

Column 1 Column 2 Column 3 0. integrated 0. management 0. options 1. total 1. organizational 1. flexibility 2. systematized 2. monitored 2. capability 3. parallel 3. reciprocal 3. mobility 4. functional 4. digital 4. programming 5. re

The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.

Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Would that my hand were as swift as my tongue.

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.

Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.

I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.

A rolling stone gathers no moss.

IF I HAD A MINE SHAFT, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.

The philosopher's treatment of a question is like the treatment of an illness.

CF&C stole it, fair and square.

The Bible says that woman was the last thing God made. Evidently He made her on Saturday night. She reveals his fatigue.

You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it true. You may have to work for it, however.

So you think that money is the root of all evil. Have you ever asked what is the root of money?

With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.

There's no justice in this world.

For fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

[Maturity consists in the discovery that] there comes a critical moment where everything is reversed, after which the point becomes to understand more and more that there is something which cannot be understood.

The confusion of a staff member is measured by the length of his memos.

Life is too short to be taken seriously.

The use of money is all the advantage there is to having money.

Do not use that foreign word "ideals". We have that excellent native word "lies".

When the blind lead the blind they will both fall over the cliff.

VII. Certain bodies can pass through solid walls painted to resemble tunnel entrances; others cannot. This trompe l'oeil inconsistency has baffled generations, but at least it is known that whoever paints an entrance on a wall's surface to

God helps them that help themselves.

The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell.

To have died once is enough.

Any philosophy that can be put "in a nutshell" belongs there.

The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.

The future not being born, my friend, we will abstain from baptizing it.

With all the talent around, it's sort of amazing that a woman could be up here with us.

The first myth of management is that it exists. The second myth of management is that success equals skill.

It's pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

Mum's the word.

The most delightful day after the one on which you buy a cottage in the country is the one on which you resell it.

Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.

When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

A highly intelligent man should take a primitive woman. Imagine if on top of everything else, I had a woman who interfered with my work.

My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.

Don't guess

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius; will you remember to pay the debt?

By perseverance the snail reached the Ark.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Given a choice between grief and nothing, I'd choose grief.

If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

If the path be beautiful, let us not ask where it leads.

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. Whatever I can pry up is not nailed down.

The seven deadly sins ... Food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability and children. Nothing can lift those seven milestones from man's neck but money; and the spirit cannot soar until the milestones are lifted.

"We're not talking about the same thing," he said. "For you the world is weird because if you're not bored with it you're at odds with it. For me the world is weird because it is stupendous, awesome, mysterious, unfathomable; my interest has been to

Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

The Worst Car Hire Service When David Schwartz left university in 1972, he set up Rent-a-wreck as a joke. Being a natural prankster, he acquired a fleet of beat-up shabby, wreckages waiting for the scrap heap in California. He put on a cap and lo

Nothing succeeds like excess.

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

He who fears the unknown may one day flee from his own backside.

It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by crying babies smoking inexpensiv

I'd be a poorer man if I'd never seen an eagle fly.

If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life.

If a guru falls in the forest with no one to hear him, was he really a guru at all?

The road to ruin is always in good repair, and the travellers pay the expense of it.

There is no sin but ignorance.

Now, you might ask, "How do I get one of those complete home tool sets for under $4?" An excellent question. Go to one of those really cheap discount stores where they sell plastic furniture in colors visible from the planet Neptune and where they

Sorry 'bout that sweat, honey. That's just holy water.

Drop the vase and it will become a Ming of the past.

In dwelling, be close to the land. In meditation, delve deep into the heart. In dealing with others, be gentle and kind. In speech, be true. In work, be competent. In action, be careful of your timing.

True to our past we work with an inherited, observed, and accepted vision of personal futility, and of the beauty of the world.

"Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing."

With women, I've got a long bamboo pole with a leather loop on the end of it. I slip the loop around their necks so they can't get away or come too close. Like catching snakes.

Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.

Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a new wearer of clothes.

"I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment."

One man's Mede is another man's Persian.

The intelligence of any discussion diminishes with the square of the number of participants.

[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

I: The best way to make a silk purse from a sow's ear is to begin with a silk sow. The same is true of money. II: If today were half as good as tomorrow is supposed to be, it would probably be twice as good as yesterday was. III: There are

You have to run as fast as you can just to stay where you are. If you want to get anywhere, you'll have to run much faster.

No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.

Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.

Standards are different for all things, so the standard set by man is by no means the only 'certain' standard. If you mistake what is relative for something certain, you have strayed far from the ultimate truth.

What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.

The term "fire" brings up visions of violence and mayhem and the ugly scene of shooting employees who make mistakes. We will now refer to this process as "deleting" an employee (much as a file is deleted from a disk). The employee is simply there o

Why are you doing this to me? Because knowledge is torture, and there must be awareness before there is change.

Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten.

A furore Normanorum libera nos, O Domine! [From the fury of the norsemen deliver us, O Lord!]

Man is the measure of all things.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

He that teaches himself has a fool for a master.

Thou hast seen nothing yet.

Do not despair of life. You have no doubt force enough to overcome your obstacles. Think of the fox prowling through wood and field in a winter night for something to satisfy his hunger. Notwithstanding cold and hounds and traps, his race survives

It is annoying to be honest to no purpose.

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.

You have all eternity to be cautious in when you're dead.

The life which is unexamined is not worth living.

A platitude is simply a truth repeated till people get tired of hearing it.

God is Dead.

Ignorance is the Mother of Devotion.

Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.

All the big corporations depreciate their possessions, and you can, too, provided you use them for business purposes. For example, if you subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, a business-related newspaper, you can deduct the cost of your house, beca

XXVI: If a sufficient number of management layers are superimposed on each other, it can be assured that disaster is not left to chance. XXVII: Rank does not intimidate hardware. Neither does the lack of rank. XXVIII: It is better to be the r

British education is probably the best in the world, if you can survive it. If you can't there is nothing left for you but the diplomatic corps.

Paradise is exactly like where you are right now ... only much, much better.

"No job too big; no fee too big!"

You k'n hide de fier, but w'at you gwine do wid de smoke?

We have nowhere else to go... this is all we have.

Circumstances rule men; men do not rule circumstances.

As well look for a needle in a bottle of hay.

It is better to have loved and lost

The greatest productive force is human selfishness.

Nothing endures but change.

Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.

We're fantastically incredibly sorry for all these extremely unreasonable things we did. I can only plead that my simple, barely-sentient friend and myself are underprivileged, deprived and also college students.

Necessity has no law.

Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.

I just asked myself... what would John DeLorean do?

"If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination."

Just because everything is different doesn't mean anything has changed.

What you want, what you're hanging around in the world waiting for, is for something to occur to you.

The truth is what is; what should be is a dirty lie.

Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.

Lookie, lookie, here comes cookie...

Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must be first overcome.

If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death. If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law? There is always an official executioner. If

Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.