If you want to get rich from writing, write the sort of thing that's read by persons who move their lips when the're reading to themselves.

Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.

One of my favorite jokes, a telling commentary on Jewish mothers' capacity to lay on guilt, involves the mother who gave her son two neckties on Chanuka. The boy hurried into his bedroom, ripped off the tie he was wearing, put on one of the ties his