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Three o'clock in the afternoon is always just a little too late or a little too early for anything you want to do.

Mencken H.L.


I just asked myself... what would John DeLorean do?

Mencken H.L.


Eggheads unite! You have nothing to lose but your yolks.

Mencken H.L.


Human resources are human first, and resources second.

Mencken H.L.


The man who sets out to carry a cat by its tail learns something that will always be useful and which never will grow dim or doubtful.

Mencken H.L.


The Least Successful Equal Pay Advertisement In 1976 the European Economic Community pointed out to the Irish Government that it had not yet implemented the agreed sex equality legislation. The Dublin Government immediately advertised for an equal

Mencken H.L.


A prediction is worth twenty explanations.

Mencken H.L.


The primary cause of failure in electrical appliances is an expired warranty. Often, you can get an appliance running again simply by changing the warranty expiration date with a 15/64-inch felt-tipped marker.

Mencken H.L.


It is not enough that I should succeed. Others must fail.

Mencken H.L.


Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?

Mencken H.L.


Once he had one leg in the White House and the nation trembled under his roars. Now he is a tinpot pope in the Coca-Cola belt and a brother to the forlorn pastors who belabor halfwits in galvanized iron tabernacles behind the railroad yards."

Mencken H.L.


"I understand this is your first dead client," Sabian was saying. The absurdity of the statement made me want to laugh but they don't call me Deadpan Allie and lie.

Mencken H.L.


Bullwinkle: You just leave that to my pal. He's the brains of the outfit. General: What does that make YOU? Bullwinkle: What else? An executive.

Mencken H.L.


Believe everything you hear about the world; nothing is too impossibly bad.

Mencken H.L.


The course of true anything never does run smooth.

Mencken H.L.


Plots are like girdles. Hidden, they hold your interest; revealed, they're of no interest except to fetishists. Like girdles, they attempt to contain an uncontainable experience.

Mencken H.L.


Money can't buy happiness, but it can make you awfully comfortable while you're being miserable.

Mencken H.L.


He who writes with no misspelled words has prevented a first suspicion on the limits of his scholarship or, in the social world, of his general education and culture.

Mencken H.L.





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I am not a crook.
Nixon Richard

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Mencken H.L.
 
 
 
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