A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.

Some men are heterosexual, and some are bisexual, and some men don't think about sex at all... they become lawyers.

I paid a visit to my local precinct in Greenwich Village and asked a sergeant to show me some rape statistics. He politely obliged. That month there had been thirty-five rape complaints, an advance of ten over the same month for the previous year.

A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.

If little green men land in your back yard, hide any little green women you've got in the house.

Non-Determinism is not meant to be reasonable.

VI: A hungry dog hunts best. A hungrier dog hunts even better. VII: Decreased business base increases overhead. So does increased business base. VIII: The most unsuccessful four years in the education of a cost-estimator is fifth grade ari

If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

The coast was clear.

The whole earth is in jail and we're plotting this incredible jailbreak.

I am a man: nothing human is alien to me.

What excuses stand in your way? How can you eliminate them?

I have ways of making money that you know nothing of.

The true way goes over a rope which is not stretched at any great height but just above the ground. It seems more designed to make people stumble than to be walked upon.

Sensible and responsible women do not want to vote.

Any stone in your boot always migrates against the pressure gradient to exactly the point of most pressure.

What an artist dies with me!

"Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing."

Dear Mister Language Person: What is the purpose of the apostrophe? Answer: The apostrophe is used mainly in hand-lettered small business signs to alert the reader than an "S" is coming up at the end of a word, as in: WE DO NOT EXCEPT PERSONAL CHEC