"I am not sure what this is, but an `F' would only dignify it."

The less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.

Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

Any two philosophers can tell each other all they know in two hours.

If you want to know what god thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

All phone calls are obscene.