But the greatest Electrical Pioneer of them all was Thomas Edison, who was a brilliant inventor despite the fact that he had little formal education and lived in New Jersey. Edison's first major invention in 1877, was the phonograph, which could soo

The faster I go, the behinder I get.

A good reputation is more valuable than money.

Here's to women. Would that we could fall into her arms without falling into her hands.

Scratch the average female and you'll find a purring bundle... at the ready to love and honor, bake a torte and still produce quintuplets.

Well, we'll really have a party, but we've gotta post a guard outside.

The time spent on any item of the agenda [of a finance committee] will be in inverse proportion to the sum involved.

When the English language gets in my way, I walk over it.

You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it true. You may have to work for it, however.

The executioner is, I hear, very expert, and my neck is very slender.

The confusion of a staff member is measured by the length of his memos.

Three o'clock in the afternoon is always just a little too late or a little too early for anything you want to do.

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.

Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.

A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.

If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it around. Trouble creates a capacity to handle it. I don't say embrace trouble; that's as bad as treating it as an enemy. But I do say meet it as a friend, for you'll see a lot of it and y

It is better to have loved and lost

No one born with a mouth and a need is "innocent".

Every young man should have a hobby: learning how to handle money is the best one.

Pauca sed matura. [Few but excellent.]

A witty saying proves nothing.

Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts.

I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

It is the quality rather than the quantity that matters.

Absolutum obsoletum. (If it works, it's out of date.)

He who knows, does not speak. He who speaks, does not know.

To have died once is enough.

God is the tangential point between zero and infinity.

The great question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul is: WHAT DOES A WOMAN WANT?

Sorry 'bout that sweat, honey. That's just holy water.

Coincidences are spiritual puns.

Anything is possible on paper.

What one believes to be true either is true or becomes true.