My father was a saint, I'm not.

Take what you can use and let the rest go by.

Among all savage beasts, none is found so harmful as woman.

In Pierre Trudeau, Canada has finally produced a Prime Minister worthy of assassination.

Your chances of getting hit by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky, and say, "Storms suck!"

If you sell diamonds, you cannot expect to have many customers. But a diamond is a diamond even if there are no customers.

It's very glamorous to raise millions of dollars, until it's time for the venture capitalist to suck your eyeballs out.

God was satisfied with his own work, and that is fatal.

What soon grows old? Gratitude.

The polite thing to do has always been to address people as they wish to be addressed, to treat them in a way they think dignified. But it is equally important to accept and tolerate different standards of courtesy, not expecting everyone else to ad

Work is of two kinds: first, altering the position of matter at or near the earth's surface relative to other matter; second, telling other people to do so.

Nonsense and beauty have close connections.

The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.

I go on working for the same reason a hen goes on laying eggs.

If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

A sinking ship gathers no moss.

It is right that he too should have his little chronicle, his memories, his reason, and be able to recognize the good in the bad, the bad in the worst, and so grow gently old all down the unchanging days and die one day like any other day, only short

If you live in a country run by committee, be on the committee.

I've got all the money I'll ever need if I die by 4 o'clock.

IF I HAD A MINE SHAFT, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.

"Are you police officers?" "No, ma'am. We're musicians."