Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.

Take your work seriously but never take yourself seriously; and do not take what happens either to yourself or your work seriously.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

God gave man two ears and one tongue so that we listen twice as much as we speak.

...He who laughs does not believe in what he laughs at, but neither does he hate it. Therefore, laughing at evil means not preparing oneself to combat it, and laughing at good means denying the power through which good is self-propagating.

In charity there is no excess.

It has long been noticed that juries are pitiless for robbery and full of indulgence for infanticide. A question of interest, my dear Sir! The jury is afraid of being robbed and has passed the age when it could be a victim of infanticide.

It is annoying to be honest to no purpose.

Too much of everything is just enough.

There is no cure for birth and death other than to enjoy the interval.

Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow!

The first myth of management is that it exists. The second myth of management is that success equals skill.

Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star.

Whatever occurs from love is always beyond good and evil.

"Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet. As you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney. Do you have a car or a job? Do you ever

Littering is dumb.

... why should you waste a single moment of *your* life seeming to be something you don't want to be? Lord, that's so simple. If you hate your job, quit it. If your friends are tedious, go out and find new friends. You are queer, you lucky fool, a

Sometimes a man who deserves to be looked down upon because he is a fool is despised only because he is a lawyer.

For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex.

A highly intelligent man should take a primitive woman. Imagine if on top of everything else, I had a woman who interfered with my work.

Two can Live as Cheaply as One for Half as Long.

The best executive is one who has sense enough to pick good people to do what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it.

Sometimes a man who deserves to be looked down upon because he is a fool is despised only because he is a lawyer.

If a thing's worth having, it's worth cheating for.

Fill what's empty, empty what's full, scratch where it itches.

A woman employs sincerity only when every other form of deception has failed.

We are what we pretend to be.

I've got all the money I'll ever need if I die by 4 o'clock.

Solipsists of the World... you are already united.

In my end is my beginning.

Silence is the element in which great things fashion themselves.