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This sad little lizard told me that he was a brontosaurus on his mother's side. I did not laugh; people who boast of ancestry often have little else to sustain them. Humoring them costs nothing and adds happiness in a world in which happiness is al

Shakespear William


Come home America.

Shakespear William


America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair.

Shakespear William


The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons.

Shakespear William


If you're like most homeowners, you're afraid that many repairs around your home are too difficult to tackle. So, when your furnace explodes, you call in a so-called professional to fix it. The "professional" arrives in a truck with lettering on t

Shakespear William


If any man wishes to be humbled and mortified, let him become president of Harvard.

Shakespeare William


If two men agree on everything, you may be sure that one of them is doing the thinking.

Shakespeare William


Well, the handwriting is on the floor.

Shakespeare William


I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

Shakespeare William


Like, if I'm not for me, then fer shure, like who will be? And if, y'know, if I'm not like fer anyone else, then hey, I mean, what am I? And if not now, like I dunno, maybe like when? And if not Who, then I dunno, maybe like the Rolling Stones?

Shakespeare William


When, in 1964, New Hampshire Republican Senator Norris Cotton announced his support of Bary Goldwater in his state's primary election, he was questioned as to whether this indicated a change of his hitherto "liberal" political views. "Well," expla

Shakespeare William


If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.

Shakespeare William


The government [is] extremely fond of amassing great quantities of statistics. These are raised to the nth degree, the cube roots are extracted, and the results are arranged into elaborate and impressive displays. What must be kept ever in mind, how

Shakespeare William


A is for Apple.

Shakespeare William


"A Mormon is a man that has the bad taste and the religion to do what a good many other people are restrained from doing by conscientious scruples and the police."

Shakespeare William


Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

Shakespeare William


Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.

Shakespeare William


Confucius say too much.

Shakespeare William


We're only in it for the volume.

Shakespeare William


Once he had one leg in the White House and the nation trembled under his roars. Now he is a tinpot pope in the Coca-Cola belt and a brother to the forlorn pastors who belabor halfwits in galvanized iron tabernacles behind the railroad yards."

Shakespeare William


A rich man told me recently that a liberal is a man who tells other people what to do with their money.

Shakespeare William


XI: If the Earth could be made to rotate twice as fast, managers would get twice as much done. If the Earth could be made to rotate twenty times as fast, everyone else would get twice as much done since all the managers would fly off. XII: I

Shakespeare William


A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow.

Shakespeare William


We lie loudest when we lie to ourselves.

William Shakespeare


The Soviet Union, which has complained recently about alleged anti-Soviet themes in American advertising, lodged an official protest this week against the Ford Motor Company's new campaign: "Hey you stinking, fat Russian, get off my Ford Escort."

William Shakespeare


The public is an old woman. Let her maunder and mumble.

William Shakespeare


The distinction between Freedom and Liberty is not accurately known; naturalists have been unable to find a living specimen of either.

William Shakespeare


What I tell you three times is true.

William Shakespeare





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There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope.
Wilde Oscar

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Shakespear William
 
 
 
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