So you think that money is the root of all evil. Have you ever asked what is the root of money?

All the really good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow.

You tread upon my patience.

None love the bearer of bad news.

The real purpose of books is to trap the mind into doing its own thinking.

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. Whatever I can pry up is not nailed down.

Real wealth can only increase.

Playing an unamplified electric guitar is like strumming on a picnic table.

"I'm in Pittsburgh. Why am I here?"

"You boys lookin' for trouble?" "Sure. Whaddya got?"

Treat your friend as if he might become an enemy.

All I kin say is when you finds yo'self wanderin' in a peach orchard, ya don't go lookin' for rutabagas.

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.

If little else, the brain is an educational toy.

The old complaint that mass culture is designed for eleven-year-olds is of course a shameful canard. The key age has traditionally been more like fourteen.

A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

What you want, what you're hanging around in the world waiting for, is for something to occur to you.

The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

Who's scruffy-looking?

Another day, another dollar.

The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.