The two most beautiful words in the English language are "Cheque Enclosed."

All phone calls are obscene.

Those who educate children well are more to be honored than parents, for these only gave life, those the art of living well.

After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven. As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created." "This is true," He replied.

The only alliance I would make with the Women's Liberation Movement is in bed.

When the ax entered the forest, the trees said, "The handle is one of us!"

I always had a repulsive need to be something more than human.

Once, I read that a man be never stronger than when he truly realizes how weak he is.

There is much Obi-Wan did not tell you.

IF I HAD A MINE SHAFT, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.

It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our offense consists in doubting it.

Prizes are for children.