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Look before you leap.

Jefferson Thomas


"Are you police officers?" "No, ma'am. We're musicians."

Jefferson Thomas


You're all clear now, kid. Now blow this thing so we can all go home.

Jefferson Thomas


Love may laugh at locksmiths, but he has a profound respect for money bags.

Jefferson Thomas


I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Jefferson Thomas


Getting kicked out of the American Bar Association is liked getting kicked out of the Book-of-the-Month Club.

Jefferson Thomas


I don't have any use for bodyguards, but I do have a specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants.

Jefferson Thomas


'Naomi, sex at noon taxes.' I moan. Never odd or even. A man, a plan, a canal, Panama. Madam, I'm Adam. Sit on a potato pan, Otis. Sit on Otis.

Jefferson Thomas


In "King Henry VI, Part II," Shakespeare has Dick Butcher suggest to his fellow anti-establishment rabble-rousers, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." That action may be extreme but a similar sentiment was expressed by Thomas K. Co

Jefferson Thomas


If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder.

Jefferson Thomas


Men's skin is different from women's skin. It is usually bigger, and it has more snakes tattooed on it. Also, if you examine a woman's skin very closely, inch by inch, starting at her shapely ankles, then gently tracing the slender curve of her cal

Thomas Jefferson





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If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.
Wicker Tom

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Thomas Jefferson
 
 
 
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