In the highest society, as well as in the lowest, woman is merely an instrument of pleasure.

Why does a hearse horse snicker, hauling a lawyer away?

... Our second completely true news item was sent to me by Mr. H. Boyce Connell Jr. of Atlanta, Ga., where he is involved in a law firm. One thing I like about the South is, folks there care about tradition. If somebody gets handed a name like "H.

Nice guys finish last.

Sho' they got to have it against the law. Shoot, ever'body git high, they wouldn't be nobody git up and feed the chickens. Hee-hee.

Princeton's taste is sweet like a strawberry tart. Harvard's is a subtle taste, like whiskey, coffee, or tobacco. It may even be a bad habit, for all I know.

Neckties strangle clear thinking.

If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem.

I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.