The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.

You k'n hide de fier, but w'at you gwine do wid de smoke?

You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred.

Inglish Spocken Hier: some mangled translations Sign on a cathedral in Spain: It is forbidden to enter a woman, even a foreigner if dressed as a man. Above the enterance to a Cairo bar: Unaccompanied ladies not admitted unless with husb

The best case: Get salary from America, build a house in England, live with a Japanese wife, and eat Chinese food. Pretty good case: Get salary from England, build a house in America, live with a Chinese wife, and eat Japanese food. The wo

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased.

We are what we pretend to be.

If happiness is in your destiny, you need not be in a hurry.

In my end is my beginning.

Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.

After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven. As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created." "This is true," He replied.

He that teaches himself has a fool for a master.

"There was an interesting development in the CBS-Westmoreland trial: both sides agreed that after the trial, Andy Rooney would be allowed to talk to the jury for three minutes about little things that annoyed him during the trial."

Wagner's music is better than it sounds.

The world is full of people who have never, since childhood, met an open doorway with an open mind.

If what they've been doing hasn't solved the problem, tell them to do something else.

Every cloud engenders not a storm.

He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world as he who is ready to die.

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it depends on what you put into it.

There seems no plan because it is all plan.