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The whole world is a scab. The point is to pick it constructively.

Allen Woody


A rolling stone gathers no moss.

Allen Woody


If you hype something and it succeeds, you're a genius

Allen Woody


I hate quotations.

Allen Woody


The first rule of all intelligent tinkering is to keep all the parts.

Allen Woody


Necessity has no law.

Allen Woody


"I only touch base with reality on an as-needed basis!"

Allen Woody


We have reason to be afraid. This is a terrible place.

Allen Woody


The Israelis are the Doberman pinschers of the Middle East. They treat the Arabs like postmen.

Allen Woody


New Jersey is not the armpit of the nation; it's the asshole of the universe.

Allen Woody


Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

Allen Woody


He jests at scars who never felt a wound.

Allen Woody


One of my favorite jokes, a telling commentary on Jewish mothers' capacity to lay on guilt, involves the mother who gave her son two neckties on Chanuka. The boy hurried into his bedroom, ripped off the tie he was wearing, put on one of the ties his

Allen Woody


Unless hours were cups of sack, and minutes capons, and clocks the tongues of bawds, and dials the signs of leaping houses, and the blessed sun himself a fair, hot wench in flame-colored taffeta, I see no reason why thou shouldst be so superfluous to

Allen Woody


If you are shooting under 80 you are neglecting your business; over 80 you are neglecting your golf.

Allen Woody


Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else; this is not advice, it is merely custom.

Allen Woody


I didn't believe in reincarnation in any of my other lives. I don't see why I should have to believe in it in this one.

Allen Woody


Adde parvum parvo manus acervus erit. [Add little to little and there will be a big pile.]

Woody Allen


In Hollywood, if you don't have happiness, you send out for it.

Woody Allen


Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Woody Allen





Random Quote


If you just try long enough and hard enough, you can always manage to boot yourself in the posterior.
Liebling A.J.

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
Woody Allen
 
 
 
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