Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He brought death into the world.

The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is marxism.

In childhood a woman must be subject to her father; in youth to her husband; when her husband is dead, to her sons. A woman must never be free of subjugation.

"My country, right or wrong" is a thing that no patriot would think of saying, except in a desperate case. It is like saying "My mother, drunk or sober."

Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Goose pimples rose all over me, my hair stood on end, my eyes filled with tears of love and gratitude for this greatest of all conquerers of human misery and shame, and my breath came in little gasps. If I had not known that the Leader would have sc

The longest part of the journey is said to be the passing of the gate.

He that composes himself is wiser than he that composes a book.

There is a natural hootchy-kootchy to a goldfish.

I don't understand what all the fuss was about in Los Angeles. It's not like we looted Brooks Brothers when Oliver North got off.

My tears stuck in their little ducts, refusing to be jerked.

Isn't it nice that people who prefer Los Angeles to San Francisco live there?

I didn't do it! Nobody saw me do it! Can't prove anything!

"Plaese porrf raed."

Many a long dispute between divines may thus be abridged: It is so. It is not so. It is so. It is not so.

You need only reflect that one of the best ways to get yourself a reputation as a dangerous citizen these days is to go about repeating the very phrases which our founding fathers used in the struggle for independence.

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

You always introduce the younger person to the older person, using the wording: "Miss Brown, I'd like to introduce you to an older person" (unless her name is not "Miss Brown"). If you do not know a person's age, ask for a driver's license and a ma

It's the opinion of some that crops could be grown on the moon. Which raises the fear that it may not be long before we're paying somebody not to.

Instead of loving your enemies, treat your friends a little better.

Facts, apart from their relationships, are like labels on empty bottles.

Some people say a front-engine car handles best. Some people say a rear-engine car handles best. I say a rented car handles best.