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Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.

B Marion Zimmer


If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?

Ba Dave


There are many of us in this old world of ours who hold that things break about even for all of us. I have observed, for example, that we all get about the same amount of ice. The rich get it in the summer and the poor get it in the winter.

Baber R.E.


When you are at Rome live in the Roman style; when you are elsewhere live as they live elsewhere.

Babson Roger


I'd just as soon kiss a Wookie.

Bacall Lauren


Receiving a million dollars tax free will make you feel better than being flat broke and having a stomach ache.

Bach J.S.


An actor's a guy who if you ain't talkin' about him, ain't listening.

Bach Richard


Well, the handwriting is on the floor.

Bacharach Burt


You cannot see the wood for the trees.

Bacon Francis


Some scholars are like donkeys, they merely carry a lot of books.

Bacon Francis


Rebellion lay in his way, and he found it.

Bacon Francis


Two wrongs are only the beginning.

Bacon Francis


For courage mounteth with occasion.

Bacon Francis


University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

Bacon Francis


Mirrors should reflect a little before throwing back images.

Bacon Francis


In Marseilles they make half the toilet soap we consume in America, but the Marseillaise only have a vague theoretical idea of its use, which they have obtained from books of travel.

Bacon Francis


He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.

Bailey P.J.


You're all clear now, kid. Now blow this thing so we can all go home.

Baja Dan Jenkins


Have the courage to take your own thoughts seriously, for they will shape you.

Baker Russell


The lovely woman-child Kaa was mercilessly chained to the cruel post of the warrior-chief Beast, with his barbarian tribe now stacking wood at her nubile feet, when the strong clear voice of the poetic and heroic Handsomas roared, 'Flick your Bic, cr

Baker Russell


It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits: freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either.

Baker Russell


I don't have any use for bodyguards, but I do have a specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants.

Baker Russell


AWAKE! FEAR! FIRE! FOES! AWAKE! FEAR! FIRE! FOES! AWAKE! AWAKE!

Baldwin James


If a guru falls in the forest with no one to hear him, was he really a guru at all?

Baldwin Stanley


The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.

Balfour


Look, we trade every day out there with hustlers, deal-makers, shysters, con-men. That's the way businesses get started. That's the way this country was built.

Balfour Arthur


I have had my television aerials removed. It's the moral equivalent of a prostate operation.

Balliett Whitney


Necessity hath no law.

Ballou Hosea


The only happiness lies in reason; all the rest of the world is dismal. The highest reason, however, I see in the work of the artist, and he may experience it as such. Happiness lies in the swiftness of feeling and thinking: all the rest of the worl

Balzac


Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

Balzac Honor'e de


Eighteen goddess-like daughters are not equal to one son with a hump.

Bandits Time


Life would be tolerable but for its amusements.

Bankhead Tallulah


If a shameless woman expects to be defiled and then dies of her fierce love because you do not consent, will chastity also be homicide?

Banks Russell


Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original and the part that is original is not good.

Banzai Buckaroo


Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is merely a good excuse not to play football.

Barber Milt


Either I'm dead or my watch has stopped.

Baretta


The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and pleasant, the second half still balmy and quite pleasant for those who hadn't heard the scream at all, but not c

Barf Biff


XXVI: If a sufficient number of management layers are superimposed on each other, it can be assured that disaster is not left to chance. XXVII: Rank does not intimidate hardware. Neither does the lack of rank. XXVIII: It is better to be the r

Barker Clive


The tree in which the sap is stagnant remains fruitless.

Barrie J.M.


For the fashion of Minas Tirith was such that it was built on seven levels, each delved into a hill, and about each was set a wall, and in each wall was a gate.

Barris Chuck


Don't steal; thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.

Barry Dave


Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Barry Dave


Rascal, am I? Take THAT!

Barry Dave


The intelligence of any discussion diminishes with the square of the number of participants.

Barry Dave


Yet creeds mean very little, Coth answered the dark god, still speaking almost gently. The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.

Barry Dave


I reverently believe that the maker who made us all makes everything in New England, but the weather. I don't know who makes that, but I think it must be raw apprentices in the weather-clerks factory who experiment and learn how, in New England, fo

Barry Dave


Sometimes a man who deserves to be looked down upon because he is a fool is despised only because he is a lawyer.

Barry Dave


Delay not, Caesar. Read it instantly.

Barry Dave


Consider well the proportions of things. It is better to be a young June-bug than an old bird of paradise.

Barry Dave


The optimist thinks that this is the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist knows it.

Barry Dave


Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.

Barry Dave


The world is your exercise-book, the pages on which you do your sums. It is not reality, although you can express reality there if you wish. You are also free to write nonsense, or lies, or to tear the pages.

Barry Dave


A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow.

Barry Dave


You climb to reach the summit, but once there, discover that all roads lead down.

Barry Dave


It's not a sin not to be Irish, but it is a great shame.

Barry Dave


What we do not understand we do not possess.

Barry Dave


Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.

Barry Dave


Reality is just a convenient measure of complexity.

Barry Dave


The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

Barry Dave


When the sun shineth, make hay.

Barry Dave


One good turn deserves another.

Barry Dave


Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

Barry Dave


Best Mistakes In Films In his "Filmgoer's Companion", Mr. Leslie Halliwell helpfully lists four of the cinema's greatest moments which you should get to see if at all possible. In "Carmen Jones", the camera tracks with Dorothy Dandridge down a st

Barry Dave


Nothing will dispel enthusiasm like a small admission fee.

Barry Dave


San Francisco isn't what it used to be, and it never was.

Barry Dave


Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.

Barry Dave


There is always something new out of Africa.

Barry Dave


The old complaint that mass culture is designed for eleven-year-olds is of course a shameful canard. The key age has traditionally been more like fourteen.

Barry Dave


She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

Barry Dave


So you think that money is the root of all evil. Have you ever asked what is the root of money?

Barry Dave


We Americans, we're a simple people... but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.

Barry Dave


The root of all superstition is that men observe when a thing hits, but not when it misses.

Barry Dave


Monterey... is decidedly the pleasantest and most civilized-looking place in California ... [it] is also a great place for cock-fighting, gambling of all sorts, fandangos, and various kinds of amusements and knavery.

Barry Dave


A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that balances are correct.

Barry Dave


Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.

Barry Dave


I have defined the hundred per cent American as ninety-nine per cent an idiot.

Barry Dave


Events are not affected, they develop.

Barry Dave


He jests at scars who never felt a wound.

Barry Dave


"Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich."

Barry Dave


It is when I struggle to be brief that I become obscure.

Barry Dave


Imagine what we can imagine!

Barry Dave


When the ax entered the forest, the trees said, "The handle is one of us!"

Barry Dave


The term "fire" brings up visions of violence and mayhem and the ugly scene of shooting employees who make mistakes. We will now refer to this process as "deleting" an employee (much as a file is deleted from a disk). The employee is simply there o

Barry Dave


A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the damned things is ample.

Barry Dave


If a fool persists in his folly he shall become wise.

Barry Dave


The sky is blue so we know where to stop mowing.

Barry Dave


Work is the crab grass in the lawn of life.

Barry Dave


I am just a nice, clean-cut Mongolian boy.

Barry Dave


Steady movement is more important than speed, much of the time. So long as there is a regular progression of stimuli to get your mental hooks into, there is room for lateral movement. Once this begins, its rate is a matter of discretion.

Barry Dave


I hate quotations.

Baruch B.


It is a wise father that knows his own child.

Battie Bill


It is better to have loved and lost

Baudelaire Charles


There is a natural hootchy-kootchy to a goldfish.

Beal Louise


I just asked myself... what would John DeLorean do?

Bear Greg


The coast was clear.

Beard Charles A.


The price of success in philosophy is triviality.

Beard Peter


Now, you might ask, "How do I get one of those complete home tool sets for under $4?" An excellent question. Go to one of those really cheap discount stores where they sell plastic furniture in colors visible from the planet Neptune and where they

Beaton Cecil


A sinking ship gathers no moss.

Beatty Paul


Furious activity is no substitute for understanding.

Beauvoir Simone de


Where it is a duty to worship the sun it is pretty sure to be a crime to examine the laws of heat.

Beck Bob


If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Becke Samuel


Darth Vader! Only you would be so bold!

Beckett


Five bicycles make a volkswagen, seven make a truck.

Beckett Samuel


Why are you doing this to me? Because knowledge is torture, and there must be awareness before there is change.

Beckett Samuel


There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit at a typewriter and open a vein.

Beckett Samuel


He was a fiddler, and consequently a rogue.

Beckman Roman


"We maintain that the very foundation of our way of life is what we call free enterprise," said Cash McCall, "but when one of our citizens show enough free enterprise to pile up a little of that profit, we do our best to make him feel that he ought t

Beeblebrox Zaphod


Take what you can use and let the rest go by.

Beecher Rev. Henry Ward


I'd be a poorer man if I'd never seen an eagle fly.

Beer Stafford


VII. Certain bodies can pass through solid walls painted to resemble tunnel entrances; others cannot. This trompe l'oeil inconsistency has baffled generations, but at least it is known that whoever paints an entrance on a wall's surface to

Behan Brendan


He who writes with no misspelled words has prevented a first suspicion on the limits of his scholarship or, in the social world, of his general education and culture.

Behan Brendan


Whom the mad would destroy, first they make Gods.

Behan Brendan


The state of innocence contains the germs of all future sin.

Behan Brendan


Hotels are tired of getting ripped off. I checked into a hotel and they had towels from my house.

Belloc Hilaire


Inglish Spocken Hier: some mangled translations Various signs in Poland: Right turn toward immediate outside. Go soothingly in the snow, as there lurk the ski demons. Five o'clock tea at all hours. In a men's washroom in Sidney:

Bellow Saul


To know Edina is to reject it.

Ben Franklin


Exxon's 'Universe of Energy' tends to the peculiar rather than the humorous ... After [an incomprehensible film montage about wind and sun and rain and strip mines and] two or three minutes of mechanical confusion, the seats locomote through a short

Benares Camden


Generally speaking, the Way of the warrior is resolute acceptance of death.

Benares Camden


A team effort is a lot of people doing what I say.

Benchley Robert


And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

Benchley Robert


Housework can kill you if done right.

Benchley Robert


Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.

Benchley Robert


A prediction is worth twenty explanations.

Benjami


To be or not to be.

Benjamin A.


"What's this? Trix? Aunt! Trix? You? You're after the prize! What is it?" He picked up the box and studied the back. "A glow-in-the-dark squid! Have you got it out of there yet?" He tilted the box, angling the little colored balls of cereal

Bennett Alan


The lawgiver, of all beings, most owes the law allegiance. He of all men should behave as though the law compelled him. But it is the universal weakness of mankind that what we are given to administer we presently imagine we own.

Bennett Arnold


No house should ever be on any hill or on anything. It should be of the hill, belonging to it.

Bennett D.


You will remember, Watson, how the dreadful business of the Abernetty family was first brought to my notice by the depth which the parsley had sunk into the butter upon a hot day.

Bennett James Gordon


Work Hard. Rock Hard. Eat Hard. Sleep Hard. Grow Big. Wear Glasses If You Need 'Em.

Bennett W.C.


Remember that there is an outside world to see and enjoy.

Bennett W.C.


The man who has never been flogged has never been taught.

Bergen Candice


Luke, I'm yer father, eh. Come over to the dark side, you hoser.

Berle Milton


The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Berlioz Hector


Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

Berman Edgar


When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

Bernanos Georges


Better tried by twelve than carried by six.

Berner Jeff


A snake lurks in the grass.

Berquier Edouard


Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

Berra Yogi


Long were the days of pain I have spent within its walls, and long were the nights of aloneness; and who can depart from his pain and his aloneness without regret?

Berra Yogi


The only alliance I would make with the Women's Liberation Movement is in bed.

Berryman John


The white race is the cancer of history.

Biel Gabriel


Doubt isn't the opposite of faith; it is an element of faith.

Bierce Ambrose


Every young man should have a hobby: learning how to handle money is the best one.

Bierce Ambrose


All phone calls are obscene.

Bierce Ambrose


No group of professionals meets except to conspire against the public at large.

Bierce Ambrose


The United States is like the guy at the party who gives cocaine to everybody and still nobody likes him.

Bierce Ambrose


There is nothing wrong with Southern California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.

Bierce Ambrose


... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

Bierce Ambrose


Indeed, the first noble truth of Buddhism, usually translated as `all life is suffering,' is more accurately rendered `life is filled with a sense of pervasive unsatisfactoriness.'

Bierce Ambrose


He who despairs over an event is a coward, but he who holds hopes for the human condition is a fool.

Bierce Ambrose


The abuse of greatness is when it disjoins remorse from power.

Bierce Ambrose


Progress was all right. Only it went on too long.

Bilbo Baggins


What a bonanza! An unknown beginner to be directed by Lubitsch, in a script by Wilder and Brackett, and to play with Paramount's two superstars, Gary Cooper and Claudette Colbert, and to be beaten up by both of them!

Bill Adler


Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.

Bill Cain


Not all who own a harp are harpers.

Bill Cain


When the English language gets in my way, I walk over it.

Billings Josh


The faster we go, the rounder we get.

Billings Josh


Then a man said: Speak to us of Expectations. He then said: If a man does not see or hear the waters of the Jordan, then he should not taste the pomegranate or ply his wares in an open market. If a man would not labour in the salt and rock quarri

Billings Josh


Odets, where is thy sting?

Billings Josh


If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.

Billings Josh


Fourteen years in the professor dodge has taught me that one can argue ingeniously on behalf of any theory, applied to any piece of literature. This is rarely harmful, because normally no-one reads such essays.

Billings Josh


I need another lawyer like I need another hole in my head.

Billings Josh


Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

Binder Dr. L.


Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game - it, and high taxes.

Binstead Arthur


Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.

Bion


Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.

Bion


If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life.

Bion


All I kin say is when you finds yo'self wanderin' in a peach orchard, ya don't go lookin' for rutabagas.

Bir Fred Nietzsche The


We'll be recording at the Paradise Friday night. Live, on the Death label.

Bismarck Otto Von


Dustin Farnum: Why, yesterday, I had the audience glued to their seats! Oliver Herford: Wonderful! Wonderful! Clever of you to think of it!

Bismarck Otto Von


"What was the worst thing you've ever done?" "I won't tell you that, but I'll tell you the worst thing that ever happened to me... the most dreadful thing."

Bismarck Otto von


[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Bismarck Otto von


America is a melting pot. You know, where those on the bottom get burned, and the scum rises to the top.

Bismarck Otto von


If any man wishes to be humbled and mortified, let him become president of Harvard.

Bismark Otto von


The greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves.

Blair


The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animals. Some of their most esteemed inventions have no other apparent purpose, for example, the dinner party of more than two, the epic poem, and the

Blake


If I cannot bend Heaven, I shall move Hell.

Blake William


My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income.

Blake William


Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.

Blake William


New Jersey is not the armpit of the nation; it's the asshole of the universe.

Blake William


For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex.

Blake William


It seems to me that nearly every woman I know wants a man who knows how to love with authority. Women are simple souls who like simple things, and one of the simplest is one of the simplest to give. ... Our family airedale will come clear across t

Blaylock James P.


It is wise to keep in mind that neither success nor failure is ever final.

Blaylock James P.


Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest r

Blaylock James P.


Nonsense and beauty have close connections.

Blaylock James P.


I dote on his very absence.

Blish James


Time as he grows old teaches all things.

Blore


Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming.

Blore


The price one pays for pursuing any profession, or calling, is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side.

Bo Napoleon


It's not enough to be Hungarian; you must have talent too.

Bo Napoleon


Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it.

Bob Cary Grant


It were not best that we should all think alike; it is difference of opinion that makes horse-races.

Bob Dylan


An aphorism is never exactly true; it is either a half-truth or one-and-a-half truths.

Boffo Mister


All I know is what the words know, and dead things, and that makes a handsome little sum, with a beginning and a middle and an end, as in the well-built phrase and the long sonata of the dead.

Bogart Humphrey


The cart has no place where a fifth wheel could be used.

Bogart Humphrey


The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Bohr Niels


America, how can I write a holy litany in your silly mood?

Boleyn Anne


What an artist dies with me!

Bombeck Erma


Nothing succeeds like the appearance of success.

Bombeck Erma


How do you explain school to a higher intelligence?

Bon John Dillinger on


Do not despair of life. You have no doubt force enough to overcome your obstacles. Think of the fox prowling through wood and field in a winter night for something to satisfy his hunger. Notwithstanding cold and hounds and traps, his race survives

Bono Ed De


Art is anything you can get away with.

Bonzai Buckaroo


The means-and-ends moralists, or non-doers, always end up on their ends without any means.

Boorstin Daniel J.


It looks like it's up to me to save our skins. Get into that garbage chute, flyboy!

Boren James H.


Every word is like an unnecessary stain on silence and nothingness.

Borge Victor


Trust in Allah, but tie your camel.

Bosky Bernadette


Trifles make perfection, and perfection is no trifle.

Bosquet Pierre


I have ways of making money that you know nothing of.

Bossert W.


A businessman is a hybrid of a dancer and a calculator.

Boswell James


I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

Bowie David


The Poems, all three hundred of them, may be summed up in one of their phrases: "Let our thoughts be correct".

Bowles Colin


I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.

Bowles Colin


I didn't do it! Nobody saw me do it! Can't prove anything!

Bradbury Ray


Suffering alone exists, none who suffer; The deed there is, but no doer thereof; Nirvana is, but no one is seeking it; The Path there is, but none who travel it.

Bradley F.H.


It is through symbols that man consciously or unconsciously lives, works and has his being.

Bradley General Omar N.


The lunatic, the lover, and the poet, Are of imagination all compact...

Bramah Ernest


If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Brandeis Justice Louis D.


The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

Brando Marlon


Of all men's miseries, the bitterest is this: to know so much and have control over nothing.

Brando Marlon


Competitive fury is not always anger. It is the true missionary's courage and zeal in facing the possibility that one's best may not be enough.

Brant Sebastian


The idea there was that consumers would bring their broken electronic devices, such as television sets and VCR's, to the destruction centers, where trained personnel would whack them (the devices) with sledgehammers. With their devices thus permanent

Braun Wernher von


[Americans] are a race of convicts and ought to be thankful for anything we allow them short of hanging.

Brecher K.


Hell is empty and all the devils are here.

Brecheux J.


Maternity pay? Now every Tom, Dick and Harry will get pregnant.

Brecht Bertold


A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.

Brecht Bertolt


I am a man: nothing human is alien to me.

Brecht Bertolt


The seven deadly sins ... Food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability and children. Nothing can lift those seven milestones from man's neck but money; and the spirit cannot soar until the milestones are lifted.

Brecht Bertolt


A woman's a woman until the day she dies, but a man's only a man as long as he can.

Brecht Bertolt


The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.

Brecht Bertolt


Things are more like they are today than they ever were before.

Brecht Bertolt


"All snakes who wish to remain in Ireland will please raise their right hands."

Brecht Bertolt


A rolling stone gathers no moss.

Brenan Gerald


A continuing flow of paper is sufficient to continue the flow of paper.

Brescia Albertano of


"You've got to have a gimmick if your band sucks."

Brian Herbert


Princeton's taste is sweet like a strawberry tart. Harvard's is a subtle taste, like whiskey, coffee, or tobacco. It may even be a bad habit, for all I know.

Briggs Austen


Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

Brilliant Ashleigh


Faith is under the left nipple.

Brilliant Ashleigh


For myself, I can only say that I am astonished and somewhat terrified at the results of this evening's experiments. Astonished at the wonderful power you have developed, and terrified at the thought that so much hideous and bad music may be put on

Brilliant Ashleigh


The [Ford Foundation] is a large body of money completely surrounded by people who want some.

Brilliant Ashleigh


Why am I so soft in the middle when the rest of my life is so hard?

Brilliant Ashleigh


If it were thought that anything I wrote was influenced by Robert Frost, I would take that particular work of mine, shred it, and flush it down the toilet, hoping not to clog the pipes. A more sententious, holding- forth old bore who expected every

Broder David


Money is truthful. If a man speaks of his honor, make him pay cash.

Brodsky Joseph


The only problem with seeing too much is that it makes you insane.

Brogan Colm


He knows not how to know who knows not also how to unknow.

Brooks Mel


He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world as he who is ready to die.

Brooks Atkinson


Living in LA is like not having a date on Saturday night.

Brooks Mel


I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

Brooks Mel


There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

Brothers The Blues


Facts are the enemy of truth.

Brothers The Blues


Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge.

Broughton Philip


When in doubt, mumble; when in trouble, delegate; when in charge, ponder.

Brow John Mason


The only cultural advantage LA has over NY is that you can make a right turn on a red light.

Brow John Mason


Every why hath a wherefore.

Brown Governor Jerry


My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.

Brown Rita Mae


Very few blacks will take up golf until the requirement for plaid pants is dropped.

Browning Robert


Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been that the need for truth, wisdom and world peace pales by comparison with the need for a toothpaste that offers whiter teeth *___and* fresher

Bruce Lenny


The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.

Bruce Lenny


Age before beauty; and pearls before swine.

Bruce Lenny


A man who cannot seduce men cannot save them either.

Bruce Lenny


I often quote myself; it adds spice to my conversation.

Bruce Lenny


According to the Rand McNally Places-Rated Almanac, the best place to live in America is the city of Pittsburgh. The city of New York came in twenty-fifth. Here in New York we really don't care too much. Because we know that we could beat up their

Bruce Lenny


I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's a knob called "brightness", but it doesn't seem to work.

Bruce Lenny


Every man who has reached even his intellectual teens begins to suspect that life is no farce; that it is not genteel comedy even; that it flowers and fructifies on the contrary out of the profoundest tragic depths of the essential death in which its

Bruce Lenny


To generalize is to be an idiot.

Bruce Lenny


'Scuse me, while I kiss the sky!

Bruce Lenny


Three minutes' thought would suffice to find this out; but thought is irksome and three minutes is a long time.

Bruce Lenny


The greatest productive force is human selfishness.

Brunner John


The whole earth is in jail and we're plotting this incredible jailbreak.

Bruyere Jean de la


All of us should treasure his Oriental wisdom and his preaching of a Zen-like detachment, as exemplified by his constant reminder to clerks, tellers, or others who grew excited by his presence in their banks: "Just lie down on the floor and keep calm

Bry Yul


"You have been in Afghanistan, I perceive."

Bryson Lyman


When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Buckley Lord


There are three reasons for becoming a writer: the first is that you need the money; the second that you have something to say that you think the world should know; the third is that you can't think what to do with the long winter evenings.

Buckley William F.


It is a lesson which all history teaches wise men, to put trust in ideas, and not in circumstances.

Buckley William F.


Likewise, the national appetizer, brine-cured herring with raw onions, wins few friends, Germans excepted.

Buddha Gotama


Sic transit gloria mundi. [So passes away the glory of this world.]

Bullwinkle Rocky and


A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.

Bullwinkle J. Moose


When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

Bulwer-Ly Grand Panjandrum


IF I HAD A MINE SHAFT, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.

Bulwer-Lytton


The major sin is the sin of being born.

Bulwer-Lytton


The Israelis are the Doberman pinschers of the Middle East. They treat the Arabs like postmen.

Bulwer-Lytton


Getting kicked out of the American Bar Association is liked getting kicked out of the Book-of-the-Month Club.

Bulwer-Lytton


The last thing one knows in constructing a work is what to put first.

Bumstead Dagwood


You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred.

Bungei Shunju


You mentioned your name as if I should recognize it, but beyond the obvious facts that you are a bachelor, a solicitor, a freemason, and an asthmatic, I know nothing whatever about you.

Buren Abigail Van


Perhaps no person can be a poet, or even enjoy poetry without a certain unsoundness of mind.

Buren Abigail Van


The two most beautiful words in the English language are "Cheque Enclosed."

Burgess Anthony


For thee the wonder-working earth puts forth sweet flowers.

Burgess Philip Larkin on Anthony


Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.

Burke James


"What are you watching?" "I don't know." "Well, what's happening?" "I'm not sure... I think the guy in the hat did something terrible." "Why are you watching it?" "You're so analytical. Sometimes you just have to let art flow over you."

Burnham Daniel Hudson


I: The best way to make a silk purse from a sow's ear is to begin with a silk sow. The same is true of money. II: If today were half as good as tomorrow is supposed to be, it would probably be twice as good as yesterday was. III: There are

Burns George


Three o'clock in the afternoon is always just a little too late or a little too early for anything you want to do.

Burns George


This is the sort of English up with which I will not put.

Burroughs William


Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.

Burroughs William S.


Lay on, MacDuff, and curs'd be him who first cries, "Hold, enough!".

Burt Lanier Safford III


The last vestiges of the old Republic have been swept away.

Burton Robert


A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation. It takes an abundance of imagination, to be sure.

Burton Sir Richard


My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I threw my amplifier out the dormitory window. We did not act in haste. First we checked to make sure the amplifier would fit through the frame, using the belt from my bathrobe to meas

Burton Sir Richard


Something's rotten in the state of Denmark.

Business Risky


A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.

Butler Dave


Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.

Butler Samuel


Any philosophy that can be put "in a nutshell" belongs there.

Butler Samuel


Then, gently touching my face, she hesitated for a moment as her incredible eyes poured forth into mine love, joy, pain, tragedy, acceptance, and peace. "'Bye for now," she said warmly.

Butler Samuel


I accept chaos. I am not sure whether it accepts me. I know some people are terrified of the bomb. But then some people are terrified to be seen carrying a modern screen magazine. Experience teaches us that silence terrifies people the most.

Butler Samuel


If we see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's the light of an oncoming train.

Butler Samuel


Never have so many understood so little about so much.

Butler Samuel


Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

Butler Samuel


I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Bux Bastian B.


If there really was a Jewish conspiracy to run the world, my rabbi would have let me in on it by now. I contribute enough to the shule.

Byrnes James F.


It is not enough that I should succeed. Others must fail.

Bywater T.


Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.

beach. from the


Set the cart before the horse.

better. much





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