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Money can't buy love, but it improves your bargaining position.

B Marion Zimmer


There must be more to life than having everything.

Ba Dave


Exceptions prove the rule, and wreck the budget.

Baber R.E.


In case of fire, stand in the hall and shout "Fire!"

Babson Roger


Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.

Bacall Lauren


It is only the man whose intellect is clouded by his sexual impulse that could give the name of the fair sex to that undersized, narrow-shouldered, broad-hipped, and short-legged race.

Bach J.S.


A man is known by the company he organizes.

Bach Richard


It is better to live rich than to die rich.

Bacharach Burt


The most costly of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true. It is the chief occupation of mankind.

Bacon Francis


If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

Bacon Francis


I am America's child, a spastic slogging on demented limbs drooling I'll trade my PhD for a telephone voice.

Bacon Francis


Thieves respect property; they merely wish the property to become their property that they may more perfectly respect it.

Bacon Francis


Grig (the navigator): ... so you see, it's just the two of us against the entire space armada. Alex (the gunner): What?!? Grig: I've always wanted to fight a desperate battle against overwhelming odds. Alex: It'll be a slaughter! Grig: That'

Bacon Francis


Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless.

Bacon Francis


"To YOU I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition."

Bacon Francis


What passes for optimism is most often the effect of an intellectual error.

Bacon Francis


The Bible says that woman was the last thing God made. Evidently He made her on Saturday night. She reveals his fatigue.

Bailey P.J.


When a man assumes a public trust, he should consider himself as public property.

Baja Dan Jenkins


Any stone in your boot always migrates against the pressure gradient to exactly the point of most pressure.

Baker Russell


It's not a sin not to be Irish, but it is a great shame.

Baker Russell


A memorandum is written not to inform the reader, but to protect the writer.

Baker Russell


Drop the vase and it will become a Ming of the past.

Baker Russell


Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash.

Baldwin James


...He who laughs does not believe in what he laughs at, but neither does he hate it. Therefore, laughing at evil means not preparing oneself to combat it, and laughing at good means denying the power through which good is self-propagating.

Baldwin Stanley


I think... I think it's in my basement... Let me go upstairs and check.

Balfour


A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing possibility.

Balfour Arthur


When in doubt, use brute force.

Balliett Whitney


America, I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel.

Ballou Hosea


Another day, another dollar.

Balzac


The more laws and order are made prominent, the more thieves and robbers there will be.

Balzac Honor'e de


I recognize terror as the finest emotion and so I will try to terrorize the reader. But if I find that I cannot terrify, I will try to horrify, and if I find that I cannot horrify, I'll go for the gross-out.

Bandits Time


"Is it just me, or does anyone else read `bible humpers' every time someone writes `bible thumpers?'

Bankhead Tallulah


Someday, Weederman, we'll look back on all this and laugh... It will probably be one of those deep, eerie ones that slowly builds to a blood-curdling maniacal scream... but still it will be a laugh.

Banks Russell


For thee the wonder-working earth puts forth sweet flowers.

Banzai Buckaroo


Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.

Barber Milt


There is more to life than increasing its speed.

Baretta


Very few people do anything creative after the age of thirty-five. The reason is that very few people do anything creative before the age of thirty-five.

Barf Biff


A racially integrated community is a chronological term timed from the entrance of the first black family to the exit of the last white family.

Barker Clive


Let sleeping dogs lie.

Barrie J.M.


The intelligence of any discussion diminishes with the square of the number of participants.

Barris Chuck


Sometimes a man who deserves to be looked down upon because he is a fool is despised only because he is a lawyer.

Barry Dave


He who despairs over an event is a coward, but he who holds hopes for the human condition is a fool.

Barry Dave


The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun.

Barry Dave


... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

Barry Dave


War is much too serious a matter to be entrusted to the military.

Barry Dave


"My country, right or wrong" is a thing that no patriot would think of saying, except in a desperate case. It is like saying "My mother, drunk or sober."

Barry Dave


Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.

Barry Dave


Fast ship? You mean you've never heard of the Millennium Falcon?

Barry Dave


"Benson, you are so free of the ravages of intelligence"

Barry Dave


The Least Successful Equal Pay Advertisement In 1976 the European Economic Community pointed out to the Irish Government that it had not yet implemented the agreed sex equality legislation. The Dublin Government immediately advertised for an equal

Barry Dave


Hell is empty and all the devils are here.

Barry Dave


I'd just as soon kiss a Wookie.

Barry Dave


There are two kinds of pedestrians... the quick and the dead.

Barry Dave


Suffering alone exists, none who suffer; The deed there is, but no doer thereof; Nirvana is, but no one is seeking it; The Path there is, but none who travel it.

Barry Dave


Perfection is reached, not when there is no longer anything to add, but when there is no longer anything to take away.

Barry Dave


Practice is the best of all instructors.

Barry Dave


Acting is not very hard. The most important things are to be able to laugh and cry. If I have to cry, I think of my sex life. And if I have to laugh, well, I think of my sex life.

Barry Dave


Mum's the word.

Barry Dave


Don't everyone thank me at once!

Barry Dave


If there were a school for, say, sheet metal workers, that after three years left its graduates as unprepared for their careers as does law school, it would be closed down in a minute, and no doubt by lawyers.

Barry Dave


The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence that it is not utterly absurd; indeed, in view of the silliness of the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more often likely to be foolish than sensible.

Barry Dave


When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money.

Barry Dave


Campus sidewalks never exist as the straightest line between two points.

Barry Dave


So she went into the garden to cut a cabbage leaf to make an apple pie; and at the same time a great she-bear, coming up the street pops its head into the shop. "What! no soap?" So he died, and she very imprudently married the barber; and there were

Barry Dave


Small is beautiful.

Barry Dave


In childhood a woman must be subject to her father; in youth to her husband; when her husband is dead, to her sons. A woman must never be free of subjugation.

Barry Dave


The means-and-ends moralists, or non-doers, always end up on their ends without any means.

Barry Dave


Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.

Barry Dave


You may my glories and my state dispose, But not my griefs; still am I king of those.

Barry Dave


The fashion wears out more apparel than the man.

Barry Dave


There are no manifestos like cannon and musketry.

Barry Dave


We are giving instruction to FBI agents in the various Chinese dialects ... to handle present and likely future contingencies.

Barry Dave


When in doubt, tell the truth.

Barry Dave


A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car.

Barry Dave


I went into the business for the money, and the art grew out of it. If people are disillusioned by that remark, I can't help it. It's the truth.

Barry Dave


Ten persons who speak make more noise than ten thousand who are silent.

Barry Dave


It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.

Barry Dave


I know on which side my bread is buttered.

Barry Dave


Those who have some means think that the most important thing in the world is love. The poor know that it is money.

Barry Dave


I think we are in Rats' Alley where the dead men lost their bones.

Barry Dave


The abuse of greatness is when it disjoins remorse from power.

Barry Dave


If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.

Barry Dave


If you give Congress a chance to vote on both sides of an issue, it will always do it.

Barry Dave


Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, it's hard to get it back in.

Barry Dave


She say, Miss Colie, You better hush. God might hear you. Let 'im hear me, I say. If he ever listened to poor colored women the world would be a different place, I can tell you.

Barry Dave


Reality is bad enough, why should I tell the truth?

Barry Dave


The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How's the President?"

Barry Dave


If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Barry Dave


Hating the Yankees is as American as pizza pie, unwed mothers and cheating on your income tax.

Barry Dave


If Christianity was morality, Socrates would be the Saviour.

Baruch B.


The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and pleasant, the second half still balmy and quite pleasant for those who hadn't heard the scream at all, but not c

Battie Bill


The introduction of a new kind of music must be shunned as imperiling the whole state, for styles of music are never disturbed without affecting the most important political institutions. ... The new style, gradually gaining a lodgement, quitely ins

Baudelaire Charles


When you're in command, command.

Beal Louise


Unless hours were cups of sack, and minutes capons, and clocks the tongues of bawds, and dials the signs of leaping houses, and the blessed sun himself a fair, hot wench in flame-colored taffeta, I see no reason why thou shouldst be so superfluous to

Bear Greg


The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.

Beard Charles A.


In my end is my beginning.

Beard Peter


Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will someday become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves.

Beaton Cecil


Never buy from a rich salesman.

Beatty Paul


The truth of a thing is the feel of it, not the think of it.

Beauvoir Simone de


The use of money is all the advantage there is to having money.

Beck Bob


Flame on!

Becke Samuel


I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Beckett


Just because everything is different doesn't mean anything has changed.

Beckett Samuel


"Not only is God dead, but just try to find a plumber on weekends."

Beckett Samuel


They're giving bank robbing a bad name.

Beckett Samuel


Indeed, the first noble truth of Buddhism, usually translated as `all life is suffering,' is more accurately rendered `life is filled with a sense of pervasive unsatisfactoriness.'

Beckman Roman


Being a woman is a terribly difficult trade, since it consists principally of dealings with men.

Beeblebrox Zaphod


The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

Beecher Rev. Henry Ward


I played lead guitar in a band called The Federal Duck, which is the kind of name that was popular in the '60s as a result of controlled substances being in widespread use. Back then, there were no restrictions, in terms of talent, on who could make

Beer Stafford


The lawgiver, of all beings, most owes the law allegiance. He of all men should behave as though the law compelled him. But it is the universal weakness of mankind that what we are given to administer we presently imagine we own.

Behan Brendan


Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them.

Behan Brendan


Whatever doesn't succeed in two months and a half in California will never succeed.

Behan Brendan


The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.

Behan Brendan


Best Mistakes In Films In his "Filmgoer's Companion", Mr. Leslie Halliwell helpfully lists four of the cinema's greatest moments which you should get to see if at all possible. In "Carmen Jones", the camera tracks with Dorothy Dandridge down a st

Belloc Hilaire


It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish.

Bellow Saul


There is nothing new except what has been forgotten.

Ben Franklin


Sometimes a man who deserves to be looked down upon because he is a fool is despised only because he is a lawyer.

Benares Camden


Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.

Benares Camden


How apt the poor are to be proud.

Benchley Robert


If you go on with this nuclear arms race, all you are going to do is make the rubble bounce.

Benchley Robert


Then a man said: Speak to us of Expectations. He then said: If a man does not see or hear the waters of the Jordan, then he should not taste the pomegranate or ply his wares in an open market. If a man would not labour in the salt and rock quarri

Benchley Robert


Only those who leisurely approach that which the masses are busy about can be busy about that which the masses take leisurely.

Benchley Robert


Adhere to your own act, and congratulate yourself if you have done something strange and extravagant, and broken the monotony of a decorous age.

Benjami


Sorry 'bout that sweat, honey. That's just holy water.

Benjamin A.


The ideal voice for radio may be defined as showing no substance, no sex, no owner, and a message of importance for every housewife.

Bennett Alan


There is no character, howsoever good and fine, but it can be destroyed by ridicule, howsoever poor and witless. Observe the ass, for instance: his character is about perfect, he is the choicest spirit among all the humbler animals, yet see what rid

Bennett Arnold


There is much Obi-Wan did not tell you.

Bennett D.


The older I grow, the less important the comma becomes. Let the reader catch his own breath.

Bennett James Gordon


[He] took me into his library and showed me his books, of which he had a complete set.

Bennett W.C.


The college graduate is presented with a sheepskin to cover his intellectual nakedness.

Bennett W.C.


"Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet. As you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney. Do you have a car or a job? Do you ever

Bergen Candice


If you are shooting under 80 you are neglecting your business; over 80 you are neglecting your golf.

Berle Milton


You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner.

Berlioz Hector


What I tell you three times is true.

Berman Edgar


Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?

Bernanos Georges


You can tell the ideals of a nation by its advertisements.

Berner Jeff


If the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world.

Berquier Edouard


Indomitable in retreat; invincible in advance; insufferable in victory.

Berra Yogi


The ripest fruit falls first.

Berra Yogi


The term "fire" brings up visions of violence and mayhem and the ugly scene of shooting employees who make mistakes. We will now refer to this process as "deleting" an employee (much as a file is deleted from a disk). The employee is simply there o

Berryman John


Men will fuck mud.

Biel Gabriel


Never invest your money in anything that eats or needs repainting.

Bierce Ambrose


I stick my neck out for nobody.

Bierce Ambrose


Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

Bierce Ambrose


Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

Bierce Ambrose


Better the prince of some inferior court, Than second, or less, in beatific light.

Bierce Ambrose


I accept chaos. I am not sure whether it accepts me. I know some people are terrified of the bomb. But then some people are terrified to be seen carrying a modern screen magazine. Experience teaches us that silence terrifies people the most.

Bierce Ambrose


The major sin is the sin of being born.

Bierce Ambrose


Certainly the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you; if you don't bet, you can't win.

Bierce Ambrose


The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.

Bierce Ambrose


Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.

Bierce Ambrose


He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world as he who is ready to die.

Bilbo Baggins


My advice to you, my violent friend, is to seek out gold and sit on it.

Bill Adler


Writing is easy; all you do is sit staring at the blank sheet of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead.

Bill Cain


Many of the characters are fools and they are always playing tricks on me and treating me badly.

Bill Cain


Life is like a 10 speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.

Billings Josh


Fear is the greatest salesman.

Billings Josh


Under any conditions, anywhere, whatever you are doing, there is some ordinance under which you can be booked.

Billings Josh


Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

Billings Josh


Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops.

Billings Josh


Take what you can use and let the rest go by.

Billings Josh


The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr.

Billings Josh


Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious.

Binder Dr. L.


"You have been in Afghanistan, I perceive."

Binstead Arthur


Life is a concentration camp. You're stuck here and there's no way out and you can only rage impotently against your persecutors.

Bion


Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it.

Bion


A game can by God repent or we'll punish it. That's how they did it in Salem in the seventeenth century, and that's how we'll do it now.

Bion


The great question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul is: WHAT DOES A WOMAN WANT?

Bir Fred Nietzsche The


We should be glad we're living in the time that we are. If any of us had been born into a more enlightened age, I'm sure we would have immediately been taken out and shot.

Bismarck Otto Von


Out of sight is out of mind.

Bismarck Otto Von


The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell.

Bismarck Otto von


If we can ever make red tape nutritional, we can feed the world.

Bismarck Otto von


When I hear a man applauded by the mob I always feel a pang of pity for him. All he has to do to be hissed is to live long enough.

Bismarck Otto von


I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.

Bismark Otto von


May you live in uninteresting times.

Blair


Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you'll be surprised at how little you have.

Blake


What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.

Blake William


When a shepherd goes to kill a wolf, and takes his dog along to see the sport, he should take care to avoid mistakes. The dog has certain relationships to the wolf the shepherd may have forgotten.

Blake William


We ... make the modern error of dignifying the Individual. We do everything we can to butter him up. We give him a name, assure him that he has certain inalienable rights, educate him, let him pass on his name to his brats and when he dies we give

Blake William


Scratch the average female and you'll find a purring bundle... at the ready to love and honor, bake a torte and still produce quintuplets.

Blake William


Poverty must have its satisfactions, else there would not be so many poor people.

Blake William


Since a politician never believes what he says, he is surprised when others believe him.

Blaylock James P.


A drama critic is a person who surprises a playwright by informing him what he meant.

Blaylock James P.


In India, "cold weather" is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door-knob and weather which will only make it mushy.

Blaylock James P.


Fortune and love befriend the bold.

Blaylock James P.


Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.

Blish James


The surest protection against temptation is cowardice.

Blore


Solipsists of the World... you are already united.

Blore


Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.

Bo Napoleon


We Americans, we're a simple people... but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.

Bo Napoleon


The chief enemy of creativity is "good" sense

Bob Cary Grant


The IRS spends God knows how much of your tax money on these toll-free information hot lines staffed by IRS employees, whose idea of a dynamite tax tip is that you should print neatly. If you ask them a real tax question, such as how you can cheat,

Bob Dylan


The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice.

Boffo Mister


If built in great numbers, motels will be used for nothing but illegal purposes.

Bogart Humphrey


Isn't it nice that people who prefer Los Angeles to San Francisco live there?

Bogart Humphrey


Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday.

Bohr Niels


A wise person makes his own decisions, a weak one obeys public opinion.

Boleyn Anne


What is good? Everything that heightens the feeling of power in man, the will to power, power itself. What is bad? Everything that is born of weakness. Not contentedness but more power; not peace but war; not virtue but fitness. The weak and the

Bombeck Erma


As to Jesus of Nazareth... I think the system of Morals and his Religion, as he left them to us, the best the World ever saw or is likely to see; but I apprehend it has received various corrupting Changes, and I have, with most of the present Dissent

Bombeck Erma


During almost fifteen centuries the legal establishment of Christianity has been upon trial. What has been its fruits? More or less, in all places, pride and indolence in the clergy; ignorance and servility in the laity,; in both, superstition, bigo

Bon John Dillinger on


To be or not to be.

Bono Ed De


VII. Certain bodies can pass through solid walls painted to resemble tunnel entrances; others cannot. This trompe l'oeil inconsistency has baffled generations, but at least it is known that whoever paints an entrance on a wall's surface to

Bonzai Buckaroo


"Cogito ergo I'm right and you're wrong."

Boorstin Daniel J.


The Hollywood tradition I like best is called "sucking up to the stars."

Boren James H.


Everything takes longer, costs more, and is less useful.

Borge Victor


... we must not judge the society of the future by considering whether or not we should like to live in it; the question is whether those who have grown up in it will be happier than those who have grown up in our society or those of the past.

Bosky Bernadette


I paid a visit to my local precinct in Greenwich Village and asked a sergeant to show me some rape statistics. He politely obliged. That month there had been thirty-five rape complaints, an advance of ten over the same month for the previous year.

Bosquet Pierre


No poet or novelist wishes he was the only one who ever lived, but most of them wish they were the only one alive, and quite a number fondly believe their wish has been granted.

Bossert W.


An older student came to Otis and said, "I have been to see a great number of teachers and I have given up a great number of pleasures. I have fasted, been celibate and stayed awake nights seeking enlightenment. I have given up everything I was aske

Boswell James


Credit ... is the only enduring testimonial to man's confidence in man.

Bowie David


It is not the critic who counts, or how the strong man stumbled, or whether the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives vali

Bowles Colin


It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. T

Bowles Colin


One big pile is better than two little piles.

Bradbury Ray


Where it is a duty to worship the sun it is pretty sure to be a crime to examine the laws of heat.

Bradley F.H.


If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.

Bradley General Omar N.


With women, I've got a long bamboo pole with a leather loop on the end of it. I slip the loop around their necks so they can't get away or come too close. Like catching snakes.

Bramah Ernest


Life would be tolerable but for its amusements.

Brandeis Justice Louis D.


Immature artists imitate, mature artists steal.

Brando Marlon


The Soviet Union, which has complained recently about alleged anti-Soviet themes in American advertising, lodged an official protest this week against the Ford Motor Company's new campaign: "Hey you stinking, fat Russian, get off my Ford Escort."

Brando Marlon


You can't run away forever, But there's nothing wrong with getting a good head start.

Brant Sebastian


The two oldest professions in the world have been ruined by amateurs.

Braun Wernher von


The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.

Brecher K.


Awash with unfocused desire, Everett twisted the lobe of his one remaining ear and felt the presence of somebody else behind him, which caused terror to push through his nervous system like a flash flood roaring down the mid-fork of the Feather River

Brecheux J.


Do not use that foreign word "ideals". We have that excellent native word "lies".

Brecht Bertold


You don't move to Edina, you achieve Edina.

Brecht Bertolt


The life which is unexamined is not worth living.

Brecht Bertolt


The Least Successful Police Dogs America has a very strong candidate in "La Dur", a fearsome looking schnauzer hound, who was retired from the Orlando police force in Florida in 1978. He consistently refused to do anything which might ruffle or of

Brecht Bertolt


No two persons ever read the same book.

Brecht Bertolt


The Least Perceptive Literary Critic The most important critic in our field of study is Lord Halifax. A most individual judge of poetry, he once invited Alexander Pope round to give a public reading of his latest poem. Pope, the leading poet of h

Brecht Bertolt


The salary of the chief executive of the large corporation is not a market award for achievement. It is frequently in the nature of a warm personal gesture by the individual to himself.

Brecht Bertolt


Termiter's argument that God is His own grandmother generated a surprising amount of controversy among Church leaders, who on the one hand considered the argument unsupported by scripture but on the other hand were unwilling to risk offending God's g

Brecht Bertolt


A Christian is a man who feels repentance on Sunday for what he did on Saturday and is going to do on Monday.

Brenan Gerald


Certain passages in several laws have always defied interpretation and the most inexplicable must be a matter of opinion. A judge of the Court of Session of Scotland has sent the editors of this book his candidate which reads, "In the Nuts (unground

Brescia Albertano of


Politics, like religion, hold up the torches of matrydom to the reformers of error.

Brian Herbert


If they were so inclined, they could impeach him because they don't like his necktie.

Briggs Austen


If happiness is in your destiny, you need not be in a hurry.

Brilliant Ashleigh


It is your concern when your neighbor's wall is on fire.

Brilliant Ashleigh


Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamp-post how it feels about dogs.

Brilliant Ashleigh


We have nowhere else to go... this is all we have.

Brilliant Ashleigh


Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will someday become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves.

Brilliant Ashleigh


The trouble with superheros is what to do between phone booths.

Broder David


Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the men are strong, the women are pretty, and the children are above-average.

Brodsky Joseph


The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference between a mermaid and a seal.

Brogan Colm


We are what we pretend to be.

Brooks Mel


I'll burn my books.

Brooks Atkinson


Man is by nature a political animal.

Brooks Mel


Home is where the hurt is.

Brooks Mel


Having nothing, nothing can he lose.

Brothers The Blues


However, on religious issues there can be little or no compromise. There is no position on which people are so immovable as their religious beliefs. There is no more powerful ally one can claim in a debate than Jesus Christ, or God, or Allah, or wha

Brothers The Blues


Joe Cool always spends the first two weeks at college sailing his frisbee.

Broughton Philip


If Jesus Christ came to this town, people would say, great guy; terrible carpenter.

Brow John Mason


Not all who own a harp are harpers.

Brow John Mason


I always had a repulsive need to be something more than human.

Brown Governor Jerry


My father was a saint, I'm not.

Brown Rita Mae


We all declare for liberty, but in using the same word we do not all mean the same thing.

Browning Robert


Christianity might be a good thing if anyone ever tried it.

Bruce Lenny


Let us never negotiate out of fear, but let us never fear to negotiate.

Bruce Lenny


When the English language gets in my way, I walk over it.

Bruce Lenny


Is uniformity attainable? Millions of innocent men, women, and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burnt, tortured, fined, imprisoned; yet we have not advanced one inch towards uniformity. What has been the effect of coercio

Bruce Lenny


A Galileo could no more be elected president of the United States than he could be elected Pope of Rome. Both high posts are reserved for men favored by God with an extraordinary genius for swathing the bitter facts of life in bandages of self-illus

Bruce Lenny


Immigration is the sincerest form of flattery.

Bruce Lenny


The genius of our ruling class is that it has kept a majority of the people from ever questioning the inequity of a system where most people drudge along paying heavy taxes for which they get nothing in return.

Bruce Lenny


A sinking ship gathers no moss.

Bruce Lenny


Chance is perhaps the work of God when He did not want to sign.

Bruce Lenny


If a man has a strong faith he can indulge in the luxury of skepticism.

Bruce Lenny


The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

Bruce Lenny


Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.

Brunner John


question = ( to ) ? be : ! be;

Bruyere Jean de la


"What's this? Trix? Aunt! Trix? You? You're after the prize! What is it?" He picked up the box and studied the back. "A glow-in-the-dark squid! Have you got it out of there yet?" He tilted the box, angling the little colored balls of cereal

Bry Yul


If the American dream is for Americans only, it will remain our dream and never be our destiny.

Bryson Lyman


Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Buckley Lord


If you don't strike oil in twenty minutes, stop boring.

Buckley William F.


Boston State House is the hub of the Solar System. You couldn't pry that out of a Boston man if you had the tire of all creation straightened out for a crowbar.

Buckley William F.


Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.

Buddha Gotama


One, with God, is always a majority, but many a martyr has been burned at the stake while the votes were being counted.

Bullwinkle Rocky and


The control of the production of wealth is the control of human life itself.

Bullwinkle J. Moose


Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow!

Bulwer-Ly Grand Panjandrum


Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.

Bulwer-Lytton


Once, I read that a man be never stronger than when he truly realizes how weak he is.

Bulwer-Lytton


Lay off the muses, it's a very tough dollar.

Bulwer-Lytton


How do you explain school to a higher intelligence?

Bulwer-Lytton


Sensible and responsible women do not want to vote.

Bumstead Dagwood


I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

Bungei Shunju


The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Buren Abigail Van


A rolling stone gathers no moss.

Buren Abigail Van


Patch griefs with proverbs.

Burgess Anthony


If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

Burgess Philip Larkin on Anthony


"Are you police officers?" "No, ma'am. We're musicians."

Burke James


Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Burnham Daniel Hudson


I was part of that strange race of people aptly described as spending their lives doing things they detest to make money they don't want to buy things they don't need to impress people they dislike.

Burns George


There's no such thing as a free lunch.

Burns George


I respect faith, but doubt is what gives you an education.

Burroughs William


Eighteen goddess-like daughters are not equal to one son with a hump.

Burroughs William S.


Think lucky. If you fall in a pond, check your pockets for fish.

Burt Lanier Safford III


Coincidences are spiritual puns.

Burton Robert


One man's Mede is another man's Persian.

Burton Sir Richard


Chapter 1 The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

Burton Sir Richard


There is no fool to the old fool.

Business Risky


There are no answers, only cross-references.

Butler Dave


A violent man will die a violent death.

Butler Samuel


A good reputation is more valuable than money.

Butler Samuel


If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

Butler Samuel


Man is the measure of all things.

Butler Samuel


He who writes with no misspelled words has prevented a first suspicion on the limits of his scholarship or, in the social world, of his general education and culture.

Butler Samuel


Usually, when a lot of men get together, it's called a war.

Butler Samuel


If you lose a son you can always get another, but there's only one Maltese Falcon.

Butler Samuel


If I could reach, I'd never leave the house.

Bux Bastian B.


Thou hast seen nothing yet.

Byrnes James F.


Ninety percent of the time things turn out worse than you thought they would. The other ten percent of the time you had no right to expect that much.

Bywater T.


The lunatic, the lover, and the poet, Are of imagination all compact...

beach. from the


Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river. Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the twigs and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life, and resisting the current what each had

better. much





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... [after the announcement of Vanguard] ... Secretary of Defense Charles Wilson (the same "Engine Charlie" who once told the Senate, "[F]or years I've thought that what was good for our country was good for General Motors, and vice versa," probably
Smithsonian Maga

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
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