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God made everything out of nothing, but the nothingness shows through.
 Ca Mona
Dear Mister Language Person: What is the purpose of the apostrophe?
Answer: The apostrophe is used mainly in hand-lettered small business signs
to alert the reader than an "S" is coming up at the end of a word, as in:
WE DO NOT EXCEPT PERSONAL CHEC Cadmus
The sky is blue so we know where to stop mowing.
 Caen
Herb
Look before you leap.
 Caen
Herb
There is nothing new except what has been forgotten.
 Caesar
Augustus
 Caesar
Augustus
Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts.
 Caesar
Gaius Julius
The philosopher's treatment of a question is like the treatment of an illness.
 Caesar
Gaius Julius
Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them.
 Caesar
Gaius Julius
The future not being born, my friend, we will abstain from baptizing it.
 Caesar
Julius
There's nothing worse for your business than extra Santa Clauses
smoking in the men's room.
 Caesar
Sid
The first rule of all intelligent tinkering is to keep all the parts.
 Cage
John
Anything that is worth doing has been done frequently. Things hitherto
undone should be given, I suspect, a wide berth.
 Cage
John
Well, the handwriting is on the floor.
 Callimachus
Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do
the work.
 Cam Kurt Vonnegut
He who laughs has not yet heard the bad news.
 Cameron Simon
The possession of a book becomes a substitute for reading it.
 Cami Pat Calafia
I hate dying.
 Camp
Henry N.
None love the bearer of bad news.
 Camus
The term "fire" brings up visions of violence and mayhem and the ugly scene
of shooting employees who make mistakes. We will now refer to this process
as "deleting" an employee (much as a file is deleted from a disk). The
employee is simply there o Camus
A.
Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow!
 Camus
Albert
The confusion of a staff member is measured by the length of his memos.
 Camus
Albert
Any philosophy that can be put "in a nutshell" belongs there.
 Camus
Albert
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.
 Camus
Albert
Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.
 Camus
Albert
Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.
 Capone
Al
Never appeal to a man's "better nature." He may not have one.
Invoking his self-interest gives you more leverage.
 Capone
Al
Turn the other cheek.
 Capone
Al
I have a simple philosophy:
Fill what's empty.
Empty what's full.
Scratch where it itches.
 Capp
Andy
Ninety percent of the time things turn out worse than you thought they would.
The other ten percent of the time you had no right to expect that much.
 Captain Ahab
When the English language gets in my way, I walk over it.
 Cardozo
Benjamin
It is the quality rather than the quantity that matters.
 Carlevale
Edmund
Those who do things in a noble spirit of self-sacrifice are to be avoided
at all costs.
 Carlin
George
"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away".
 Carlyle
The pollution's at that awkward stage. Too thick to navigate and too
thin to cultivate.
 Carlyle
Thomas
Honesty's the best policy.
 Carlyle
Thomas
The man-hating woman, like the cold woman, is largely imaginary. She
is simply a woman who has done her best to snare a man and has failed.
 Carlyle
Thomas
XXVI:
If a sufficient number of management layers are superimposed on each
other, it can be assured that disaster is not left to chance.
XXVII:
Rank does not intimidate hardware. Neither does the lack of rank.
XXVIII:
It is better to be the r Carlyle
Thomas
The road to Hades is easy to travel.
 Carnegie Andrew
Wait for that wisest of all counselors, Time.
 Carpenter
Elizabeth
The root of all superstition is that men observe when a thing hits,
but not when it misses.
 Carroll
Lewis
All men know the utility of useful things;
but they do not know the utility of futility.
 Carroll
Lewis
If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it around.
Trouble creates a capacity to handle it. I don't say embrace trouble; that's
as bad as treating it as an enemy. But I do say meet it as a friend, for
you'll see a lot of it and y Carroll
Lewis
"You mean, if you allow the master to be uncivil, to treat you
any old way he likes, and to insult your dignity, then he may deem you
fit to hear his view of things?"
"Quite the contrary. You must defend your integrity, assuming
you have integrit Carroll
Lewis
Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.
 Carroll
Lewis
A businessman is a hybrid of a dancer and a calculator.
 Carson
Johnny
It is better to have loved and lost  Carson
Johnny
Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.
 Carson
Johnny
Well, he thought, since neither Aristotelian Logic nor the disciplines
of Science seemed to offer much hope, it's time to go beyond them...
Drawing a few deep even breaths, he entered a mental state practiced
only by Masters of the Universal Way of Carson
Johnny
A man gazing at the stars is proverbially at the mercy of the puddles
in the road.
 Carter
Jimmy
Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to
stick to one thing till it gets there.
 Carus
Titus Lucretius
When the speaker and he to whom he is speaks do not understand, that is
metaphysics.
 Carus
Titus Lucretius
Many hands make light work.
 Carus
Titus Lucretius
The greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves.
 Carus
Titus Lucretius
In every hierarchy the cream rises until it sours.
 Cassidy
Butch
Nothing succeeds like success.
 Castro
Fidel
There is no fool to the old fool.
 Catalog
Whole Earth
Trust in Allah, but tie your camel.
 Catflap
Filthy Rich and
In the highest society, as well as in the lowest, woman is merely an
instrument of pleasure.
 Catlin
Wynn
You or I must yield up his life to Ahrimanes. I would rather it were you.
I should have no hesitation in sacrificing my own life to spare yours, but
we take stock next week, and it would not be fair on the company.
 Cato
Some women should be beaten regularly, like gongs.
 Cato
Marcus Procius
What does not destroy me, makes me stronger.
 Catullus
Gaius Valerius
A commune is where people join together to share their lack of wealth.
 Catullus
Gaius Valerius
When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable,
must be the truth.
 Catullus
Gaius Valerius
"Life is too important to take seriously."
 Caussade
De
I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
 Cavour
Camillo Di
There's no such thing as an original sin.
 Celine
Louis-Ferdinand
God help those who do not help themselves.
 Cervantes
Think lucky. If you fall in a pond, check your pockets for fish.
 Cervantes
A woman who is guided by the head and not by the heart is a social
pestilence: she has all the defects of the passionate and affectionate
woman, with none of her compensations; she is without pity, without love,
without virtue, without sex.
 Cervantes
There is a natural hootchy-kootchy to a goldfish.
 Cervantes
You can observe a lot just by watching.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
Execute every act of thy life as though it were thy last.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
Doubt isn't the opposite of faith; it is an element of faith.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
There are no accidents whatsoever in the universe.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
Facts are the enemy of truth.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
What!? Me worry?
 Cervantes
Miguel de
We're all in this alone.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
It is better to live rich than to die rich.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
Walking on water wasn't built in a day.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
Small is beautiful.
 Cervantes
Miguel de
The use of money is all the advantage there is to having money.
 Ch St. John
Remembering is for those who have forgotten.
 Chadwick
Hal
Credit ... is the only enduring testimonial to man's confidence in man.
 Chamfort
Nicolas
Plus ,ca change, plus c'est la m^eme chose.
[The more things change, the more they remain the same.]
 Chandler
Raymond
One learns to itch where one can scratch.
 Chandler
Raymond
The best executive is one who has sense enough to pick good people to do
what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with
them while they do it.
 Chandler
Raymond
Between 1950 and 1952, a bored weatherman, stationed north of Hudson
Bay, left a monument that neither government nor time can eradicate.
Using a bulldozer abandoned by the Air Force, he spent two years and
great effort pushing boulders into a single Chandler
Raymond
From the cradle to the coffin underwear comes first.
 Channing
William Ellery
The man who runs may fight again.
 Chapelain Maurice
God gave man two ears and one tongue so that we listen twice as much as
we speak.
 Chaplin
Charlie
A wise person makes his own decisions, a weak one obeys public opinion.
 Chapman
George
What one fool can do, another can.
 Charles Chincholles
You get what you pay for.
 Charles Darling
With all the talent around, it's sort of amazing that a woman could be
up here with us.
 Charles Darling
Look, we trade every day out there with hustlers, deal-makers, shysters,
con-men. That's the way businesses get started. That's the way this
country was built.
 Charles Dickens
A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours.
 Charles Dickens
By protracting life, we do not deduct one jot from the duration of death.
 Charles Dickens
There's no such thing as a free lunch.
 Charles Ives
Never invest your money in anything that eats or needs repainting.
 Charles Schulz
Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.
 Charlie
Crazy
Innovation is hard to schedule.
 Charlot
When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing,"
it's the money.
 Chateaubriand
If a thing's worth doing, it is worth doing badly.
 Chavez
Cesar
There has been a little distress selling on the stock exchange.
 Chaykin
Howard
Every person, all the events in your life are there because you have
drawn them there. What you choose to do with them is up to you.
 Chazal
If you are shooting under 80 you are neglecting your business;
over 80 you are neglecting your golf.
 Cheever
John
Nitwit ideas are for emergencies. You use them when you've got nothing
else to try. If they work, they go in the Book. Otherwise you follow
the Book, which is largely a collection of nitwit ideas that worked.
 Chesterson
Gilbert K.
Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.
 Chesterton
G. K.
One good turn deserves another.
 Chesterton
G.K.
What fools these mortals be.
 Chesterton
G.K.
Chance is perhaps the work of God when He did not want to sign.
 Chesterton
G.K.
There are many of us in this old world of ours who hold that things break
about even for all of us. I have observed, for example, that we all get
about the same amount of ice. The rich get it in the summer and the poor
get it in the winter.
 Chesterton
G.K.
Everything is possible. Pass the word.
 Chesterton
G.K.
Force has no place where there is need of skill.
 Chesterton G.K.
Perhaps the remembrance of these things will prove a source of future
pleasure.
 Chesterton G.K.
Two can Live as Cheaply as One for Half as Long.
 Chevalier
Maurice
If we don't survive, we don't do anything else.
 Chevins
Anthony
It is ridiculous to call this an industry. This is not. This is rat eat
rat, dog eat dog. I'll kill 'em, and I'm going to kill 'em before they
kill me. You're talking about the American way of survival of the fittest.
 Chichester
Reverend
If a man has a strong faith he can indulge in the luxury of skepticism.
 Chill
The Big
Forgive and forget.
 Chilo
God helps them that help themselves.
 Chris Robert
A woman takes off her claim to respect along with her garments.
 Christ
Jesus
Men freely believe that what they wish to desire.
 Chuang-tzu
The optimist thinks that this is the best of all possible worlds,
and the pessimist knows it.
 Chuang-tzu
Just remember, wherever you go, there you are.
 Chuck Jones
It is bad luck to be superstitious.
 Churchill
Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.
 Churchill
W.
When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
 Churchill
Winston
If a thing's worth having, it's worth cheating for.
 Churchill
Winston
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
 Churchill
Winston
To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
 Churchill
Winston
Love may laugh at locksmiths, but he has a profound respect for money bags.
 Churchill
Winston
Nothing recedes like success.
 Churchill
Winston
A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation.
It takes an abundance of imagination, to be sure.
 Churchill
Winston
One of your most ancient writers, a historian named Herodotus, tells of a
thief who was to be executed. As he was taken away he made a bargain with
the king: in one year he would teach the king's favorite horse to sing
hymns. The other prisoners wa Churchill
Winston
I was in this prematurely air conditioned supermarket and there were all
these aisles and there were these bathing caps you could buy that had these
kind of Fourth of July plumes on them that were red and yellow and blue and
I wasn't tempted to buy Churchill
Winston
We were so poor we couldn't afford a watchdog. If we heard a noise at night,
we'd bark ourselves.
 Churchill
Winston
The problem that we thought was a problem was, indeed, a problem, but
not the problem we thought was the problem.
 Churchill
Winston
"No job too big; no fee too big!"
 Churchill
Winston
Having the fewest wants, I am nearest to the gods.
 Churchill
Winston
Human resources are human first, and resources second.
 Churchill
Winston
He has not acquired a fortune; the fortune has acquired him.
 Churchill
Winston
Money can't buy love, but it improves your bargaining position.
 Churchill W.
I never cheated an honest man, only rascals. They wanted something for
nothing. I gave them nothing for something.
 Churchill W.
Getting into trouble is easy.
 Churchill Winston
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
 Churchill Winston
Kindness is the beginning of cruelty.
 Churchill Winston
Women are nothing but machines for producing children.
 Churchill Winston
... a thing called Ethics, whose nature was confusing but if you had it you
were a High-Class Realtor and if you hadn't you were a shyster, a piker and
a fly-by-night. These virtues awakened Confidence and enabled you to handle
Bigger Propositions.  Ciardi
John
To restore a sense of reality, I think Walt Disney should have a Hardluckland.
 Ciardi
John
The more the merrier.
 Ciardi
John
Long were the days of pain I have spent within its walls, and
long were the nights of aloneness; and who can depart from his
pain and his aloneness without regret?
 Cicero
Marcus Tullius
While there's life, there's hope.
 Cicero
Marcus Tullius
She applies her lipstick in spite of its contents: "greasy rouge,
containing crushed and dried insect corpses for coloring, beeswax for
stiffness, and olive oil to help it flow - the latter having the
unfortunate tendency to go rancid several hours a Claghorn
Senator
If you sell diamonds, you cannot expect to have many customers.
But a diamond is a diamond even if there are no customers.
 Clapton
Eric
Beauty is one of the rare things which does not lead to doubt of God.
 Clarence Darrow to William
Genius is pain.
 Clark
Alex
"The chain which can be yanked is not the eternal chain."
 Clark
Blake
A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that balances are
correct.
 Clark
Ramsey
The world is your exercise-book, the pages on which you do your sums.
It is not reality, although you can express reality there if you wish.
You are also free to write nonsense, or lies, or to tear the pages.
 Clarke
Arthur
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
 Clarke
Arthur C.
Life is one long struggle in the dark.
 Clarke
Arthur C.
It is wise to keep in mind that neither success nor failure is ever final.
 Cleaver
Eldridge
An aphorism is never exactly true; it is either a half-truth or
one-and-a-half truths.
 Clemenceau
Who does not trust enough will not be trusted.
 Clement
Hal
When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.
 Cleyre
Voltarine de
Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.
 Clifton Fadiman
A witty saying proves nothing.
 Clopton
R.
Fain would I climb, yet fear I to fall.
 Clough
Arthur
Every man who has reached even his intellectual teens begins to suspect
that life is no farce; that it is not genteel comedy even; that it flowers
and fructifies on the contrary out of the profoundest tragic depths of the
essential death in which its Cocteau
Jean
With her body, woman is more sincere than man; but with her mind she lies.
And when she lies, she does not believe herself.
 Cocteau
Jean
A good reputation is more valuable than money.
 Cohan
George M.
If I cannot bend Heaven, I shall move Hell.
 Cohan
George M.
Life is like a 10 speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.
 Cohen
Mickey
Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star.
 Cohen Leonard
The trouble with the rat-race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
 Cointment
Joe
"The jig's up, Elman."
"Which jig?"
 Coke
Sir Edward
You have to run as fast as you can just to stay where you are.
If you want to get anywhere, you'll have to run much faster.
 Col
Lew
Only that in you which is me can hear what I'm saying.
 Colby
Frank Moore
Competitive fury is not always anger. It is the true missionary's courage
and zeal in facing the possibility that one's best may not be enough.
 Colby F.M.
Practice yourself what you preach.
 Colton
Even the best of friends cannot attend each other's funeral.
 Colton
C.C.
Reality is bad enough, why should I tell the truth?
 Comics
Green Lantern
In charity there is no excess.
 Confucius
I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.
 Confucius
"Do you think there's a God?"
"Well, ____SOMEbody's out to get me!"
 Confucius
Alas, I am dying beyond my means.
 Confucius
The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job
application form.
 Confucius
An older student came to Otis and said, "I have been to see a
great number of teachers and I have given up a great number of pleasures.
I have fasted, been celibate and stayed awake nights seeking enlightenment.
I have given up everything I was aske Confucius
Don't go to bed with no price on your head.
 Confucius
Mental power tended to corrupt, and absolute intelligence tended to
corrupt absolutely, until the victim eschewed violence entirely in
favor of smart solutions to stupid problems.
 Confucius
The first myth of management is that it exists. The second myth of
management is that success equals skill.
 Confucius
Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.
 Conrad
It is not doing the thing we like to do, but liking the thing we have to do,
that makes life blessed.
 Conrad
Joseph
Three minutes' thought would suffice to find this out; but thought is
irksome and three minutes is a long time.
 Conrad
Joseph
The most difficult thing in the world is to know how to do a thing and to
watch someone else doing it wrong, without commenting.
 Coo Alistair
If a guru falls in the forest with no one to hear him, was he really a
guru at all?
 Cooke
Alistair
The whole earth is in jail and we're plotting this incredible jailbreak.
 Cooke
Alistair
Our business in life is not to succeed but to continue to fail in high spirits.
 Coolidge
Calvin
Given a choice between grief and nothing, I'd choose grief.
 Coolidge
Calvin
The only happiness lies in reason; all the rest of the world is dismal.
The highest reason, however, I see in the work of the artist, and he may
experience it as such. Happiness lies in the swiftness of feeling and
thinking: all the rest of the worl Coolidge
Calvin
Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.
 Coolidge
Calvin
Our policy is, when in doubt, do the right thing.
 Coolidge
Calvin
It's not so hard to lift yourself by your bootstraps once you're off the ground.
 Coolidge
Calvin
A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing possibility.
 Coolidge
Calvin
One picture is worth more than ten thousand words.
 Cooper
A.
Now, you might ask, "How do I get one of those complete home tool
sets for under $4?" An excellent question.
Go to one of those really cheap discount stores where they sell
plastic furniture in colors visible from the planet Neptune and where they
 Cooper
Jeff
Money doesn't talk, it swears.
 Corwin Prince of
We have lingered long enough on the shores of the Cosmic Ocean.
 Costello
E.
You must be the change you wish to see in the world.
 Costello
Elvis
If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do
have a problem.
 Costello
Elvis
The two most beautiful words in the English language are "Cheque Enclosed."
 Costello
Elvis
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
 Coult
Alan
We can embody the truth, but we cannot know it.
 Couple
The Odd
Work is of two kinds: first, altering the position of matter at or near
the earth's surface relative to other matter; second, telling other people
to do so.
 Cousins
Norman
Necessity hath no law.
 Cousins Norman
It is so stupid of modern civilisation to have given up believing in the
devil when he is the only explanation of it.
 Coward
Noel
Life is the childhood of our immortality.
 Cowboy
The
Honesty is for the most part less profitable than dishonesty.
 Crane
Dr. Frank
As well look for a needle in a bottle of hay.
 Crane
Frank
Let your conscience be your guide.
 Crane
Stephen
God is the tangential point between zero and infinity.
 Crane
Stephen
Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.
 Credo
The Webb Wilder
You can never do just one thing.
 Crisp
Quentin
There is no proverb that is not true.
 Crisp
Quentin
He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world
as he who is ready to die.
 Crisp
Quentin
Ah, but a man's grasp should exceed his reach,
Or what's a heaven for ?
 Croll
John
Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great
crystal river. Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the twigs
and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life, and
resisting the current what each had Cromwell
Oliver
I know on which side my bread is buttered.
 Crosby
Norm
A society in which women are taught anything but the management of a family,
the care of men, and the creation of the future generation is a society
which is on its way out.
 Crowe
Joe
As failures go, attempting to recall the past is like trying to grasp
the meaning of existence. Both make one feel like a baby clutching at
a basketball: one's palms keep sliding off.
 Crumb
R.
Let sleeping dogs lie.
 Cuomo
Mario
(1) Avoid fried meats which angry up the blood.
(2) If your stomach antagonizes you, pacify it with cool thoughts.
(3) Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move.
(4) Go very lightly on the vices, such as carrying on in society, as
 Curtis Charles
The sooner you make your first 5000 mistakes, the sooner you will be
able to correct them.
 Cynic
Diogenes the
Think sideways!
 caption
Weber cartoon
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Random Quote
Water, taken in moderation cannot hurt anybody.
 Twain
Mark
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