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Crucifixes are sexy because there's a naked man on them.

D Vine


The health of a democratic society may be measured by the quality of functions performed by private citizens.

D'Hericault Charles


The primary theme of SoupCon is communication. The acronym "LEO" represents the secondary theme: Law Enforcement Officials The overall theme of SoupCon shall be: Avoiding Communication with Law Enforcement Officials

Dada Idi Amin


For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex.

Dada Idi Amin


Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star.

Dagny Taggart


Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

Daley Mayor


Americans' greatest fear is that America will turn out to have been a phenomenon, not a civilization.

Daley Mayor


What you want, what you're hanging around in the world waiting for, is for something to occur to you.

Daley Richard


"If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination."

Dali Salvador


You must know that a man can have only one invulnerable loyalty, loyalty to his own concept of the obligations of manhood. All other loyalties are merely deputies of that one.

Dam Andries van


Not to laugh, not to lament, not to curse, but to understand.

Dane Franklin K.


United Nations, New York, December 25. The peace and joy of the Christmas season was marred by a proclamation of a general strike of all the military forces of the world. Panic reigns in the hearts of all the patriots of every persuasion. Meanwhil

Dangerfield Rodney


Housework can kill you if done right.

Danton G.J.


Nasrudin returned to his village from the imperial capital, and the villagers gathered around to hear what had passed. "At this time," said Nasrudin, "I only want to say that the King spoke to me." All the villagers but the stupidest ran off to spr

Darling Charles


Then a man said: Speak to us of Expectations. He then said: If a man does not see or hear the waters of the Jordan, then he should not taste the pomegranate or ply his wares in an open market. If a man would not labour in the salt and rock quarri

Darrow Clarence


I don't have any use for bodyguards, but I do have a specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants.

Darrow Clarence


Beauty is one of the rare things which does not lead to doubt of God.

Darrow Clarence


Interesting poll results reported in today's New York Post: people on the street in midtown Manhattan were asked whether they approved of the US invasion of Grenada. Fifty-three percent said yes; 39 percent said no; and 8 percent said "Gimme a quart

Darrow Clarence


When eating an elephant take one bite at a time.

Darrow Clarence


A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the damned things is ample.

Darrow Clarence


I need another lawyer like I need another hole in my head.

Darwin Charles


A Polish worker walks into a bank to deposit his paycheck. He has heard about Poland's economic problems, and he asks what would happen to his money if the bank collapsed. "All of our deposits are guaranteed by the finance ministry, sir," the telle

Darwin Porter


I steal.

Dass Baba Ram


An atom-blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.

Dass Baba Ram


Inglish Spocken Hier: some mangled translations Sign on a cathedral in Spain: It is forbidden to enter a woman, even a foreigner if dressed as a man. Above the enterance to a Cairo bar: Unaccompanied ladies not admitted unless with husb

Dave


If there were a school for, say, sheet metal workers, that after three years left its graduates as unprepared for their careers as does law school, it would be closed down in a minute, and no doubt by lawyers.

Dave Barry


Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.

David Bodanis


Unknown person(s) stole the American flag from its pole in Etra Park sometime between 3pm Jan 17 and 11:30 am Jan 20. The flag is described as red, white and blue, having 50 stars and was valued at $40.

David Niven


It is not the critic who counts, or how the strong man stumbled, or whether the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives vali

Davis Evan


I went to a Grateful Dead Concert and they played for SEVEN hours. Great song.

Davis Evan


Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt.

Davis Miles


Any road followed to its end leads precisely nowhere. Climb the mountain just a little to test it's a mountain. From the top of the mountain, you cannot see the mountain.

Davisson Richard


All kings is mostly rapscallions.

Day Clarence


The clergy successfully preached the doctrines of patience and pusillanimity; the active virtues of society were discouraged; and the last remains of a military spirit were buried in the cloister: a large portion of public and private wealth was cons

DeBalzac Honore


Audacity, and again, audacity, and always audacity.

DeGaulle Charles


A furore Normanorum libera nos, O Domine! [From the fury of the norsemen deliver us, O Lord!]

Dead The Grateful


Let your conscience be your guide.

Dean James


I know on which side my bread is buttered.

Dekker Thomas


But you shall not escape my iambics.

Demosthenes


One learns to itch where one can scratch.

Dennett Daniel


[He] took me into his library and showed me his books, of which he had a complete set.

Derek Bok


Catholicism has changed tremendously in the recent years. Now when Communion is served there is also a salad bar.

Descart


Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value.

Descartes Rene


Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical infants.

Dewar Lord Thomas


He that composes himself is wiser than he that composes a book.

Dewar Lord Thomas


Two wrongs are only the beginning.

Dewar Lord Thomas Rober


Necessity hath no law.

Dewey John


Diplomacy is about surviving until the next century. Politics is about surviving until Friday afternoon.

Dick Philip K.


Column 1 Column 2 Column 3 0. integrated 0. management 0. options 1. total 1. organizational 1. flexibility 2. systematized 2. monitored 2. capability 3. parallel 3. reciprocal 3. mobility 4. functional 4. digital 4. programming 5. re

Dickens Charles


Do you know the difference between education and experience? Education is what you get when you read the fine print; experience is what you get when you don't.

Dickens Charles


Life being what it is, one dreams of revenge.

Dickens Charles


I think we're in trouble.

Dickey James


My dear People. My dear Bagginses and Boffins, and my dear Tooks and Brandybucks, and Grubbs, and Chubbs, and Burrowses, and Hornblowers, and Bolgers, Bracegirdles, Goodbodies, Brockhouses and Proudfoots. Also my good Sackville Bagginses that I w

Dickson Paul


He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer than the staple of his argument.

Dictionary Webster's Unafraid


Sometimes I wonder if I'm in my right mind. Then it passes off and I'm as intelligent as ever.

Dictum Schumacher's


Christianity might be a good thing if anyone ever tried it.

Diefenbaker John


The smallest worm will turn being trodden on.

Dillinger John


... "fire" does not matter, "earth" and "air" and "water" do not matter. "I" do not matter. No word matters. But man forgets reality and remembers words. The more words he remembers, the cleverer do his fellows esteem him. He looks upon the great

Diogenes


The two party system ... is a triumph of the dialectic. It showed that two could be one and one could be two and had probably been fabricated by Hegel for the American market on a subcontract from General Dynamics.

Disney Walt


The rule is, jam to-morrow and jam yesterday, but never jam today.

Disney Walt


The rights you have are the rights given you by this Committee [the House Un-American Activities Committee]. We will determine what rights you have and what rights you have not got.

Disra Benjamin


I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

Disrael Benjamin


If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Disraeli Benjamin


The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.

Disraeli Benjamin


One, with God, is always a majority, but many a martyr has been burned at the stake while the votes were being counted.

Disraeli Benjamin


... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

Disraeli Benjamin


If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder.

Disraeli Benjamin


L'hazard ne favorise que l'esprit prepare.

Disraeli Benjamin


Ignorance is the Mother of Devotion.

Dobbs Waldo D.R.


If Christianity was morality, Socrates would be the Saviour.

Dobson Austin


Those who do things in a noble spirit of self-sacrifice are to be avoided at all costs.

Doctor The


Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.

Dogtender The Mad


I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

Dolph Sharp


Go ahead... make my day.

Dolph Sharp


A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

Donald N. Smith president


God gave man two ears and one tongue so that we listen twice as much as we speak.

Donatus Aelius


You may have heard that a dean is to faculty as a hydrant is to a dog.

Donleavy J.P.


"Well, it's garish, ugly, and derelicts have used it for a toilet. The rides are dilapidated to the point of being lethal, and could easily maim or kill innocent little children." "Oh, so you don't like it?" "Don't like it? I'm CRAZY for it."

Dooley Mr.


You can't underestimate the power of fear.

Dooley Mr.


There is no ox so dumb as the orthodox.

Dostoyevski F.


It is often the case that the man who can't tell a lie thinks he is the best judge of one.

Doug Larson


Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?

Douglas Lord Alfred


I'm not a lovable man.

Douglas Norman


It is easier to be a "humanitarian" than to render your own country its proper due; it is easier to be a "patriot" than to make your community a better place to live in; it is easier to be a "civic leader" than to treat your own family with loving un

Douglas Adams


When I saw a sign on the freeway that said, "Los Angeles 445 miles," I said to myself, "I've got to get out of this lane."

Douglass Frederick


You know it's going to be a long day when you get up, shave and shower, start to get dressed and your shoes are still warm.

Douglass Frederick


The only thing that experience teaches us is that experience teaches us nothing.

Doyle Sir Arthur Conan


The ratio of literacy to illiteracy is a constant, but nowadays the illiterates can read.

Doyle Sir Arthur Conan


The goys have proven the following theorem...

Doyle Sir Arthur Conan


You know how to win a victory, Hannibal, but not how to use it.

Dr. Laurence J. Peter


May you live in uninteresting times.

Dreshfield Jerry


"Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around. No contest."

Droz Gustave


The politician is someone who deals in man's problems of adjustment. To ask a politician to lead us is to ask the tail of a dog to lead the dog.

Drucker Peter


It is convenient that there be gods, and, as it is convenient, let us believe there are.

Dudley Riggs


It is either through the influence of narcotic potions, of which all primitive peoples and races speak in hymns, or through the powerful approach of spring, penetrating with joy all of nature, that those Dionysian stirrings arise, which in their int

Duggan B.


I'll burn my books.

Duke Raoul


I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Dumas


... difference of opinion is advantagious in religion. The several sects perform the office of a common censor morum over each other. Is uniformity attainable? Millions of innocent men, women, and children, since the introduction of Christianity,

Dumas Alexander


Having the fewest wants, I am nearest to the gods.

Dumas Alexandre


I am myself plus my circumstance, and if I do not save it, I cannot save myself.

Dunne Finley Peter


I went to my mother and told her I intended to commence a different life. I asked for and obtained her blessing and at once commenced the career of a robber.

Durant Will


"What's this? Trix? Aunt! Trix? You? You're after the prize! What is it?" He picked up the box and studied the back. "A glow-in-the-dark squid! Have you got it out of there yet?" He tilted the box, angling the little colored balls of cereal

Durocher Leo


Or you or I must yield up his life to Ahrimanes. I would rather it were you. I should have no hesitation in sacrificing my own life to spare yours, but we take stock next week, and it would not be fair on the company.

Dwight Walter


Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.

Dwight Van de Vate


To think contrary to one's era is heroism. But to speak against it is madness.

Dye W.H. Auden


Ten persons who speak make more noise than ten thousand who are silent.

Dyer


Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game - it, and high taxes.

Dyke Henry Van


We rarely find anyone who can say he has lived a happy life, and who, content with his life, can retire from the world like a satisfied guest.

Dykstra


A dead man cannot bite.

Dylan Bob


I DON'T THINK I'M ALONE when I say I'd like to see more and more planets fall under the ruthless domination of our solar system.

Dylan Bob


I didn't do it! Nobody saw me do it! Can't prove anything!

Dylan Bob


You see things; and you say "Why?" But I dream things that never were; and I say "Why not?"

Dyson Freeman


You or I must yield up his life to Ahrimanes. I would rather it were you. I should have no hesitation in sacrificing my own life to spare yours, but we take stock next week, and it would not be fair on the company.

de Dave Johnson on


Remember that there is an outside world to see and enjoy.

distinctly and quite





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Giving money and power to governments is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
O'Rourke P.J.

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