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When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

G Gen.


The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.

G. Gordon Liddy's


You climb to reach the summit, but once there, discover that all roads lead down.

G. Roy


No small art is it to sleep: it is necessary for that purpose to keep awake all day.

G. Roy


Fain would I climb, yet fear I to fall.

Galbraith J.K.


Ten years of rejection slips is nature's way of telling you to stop writing.

Galbraith J.K.


"If a camel flies, no one laughs if it doesn't get very far."

Galbraith John Kenneth


It is wise to keep in mind that neither success nor failure is ever final.

Galbraith John Kenneth


I knew her before she was a virgin.

Galbraith John Kenneth


The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions.

Galilei Galileo


Objectivity is to a newspaper what virtue is to a woman.

Gallagher


Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it.

Gallagher Eugene P.


I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.

Gallaher M.


Never take a resume seriously. Resumes only make money for the people who write the resumes. No resume ever tells an employer how many times a job applicant has had the clap. Why, indeed, would anyone hire a person based on a resume written by a

Gallaher M.


Nothing recedes like success.

Galsworthy John


If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know.

Game


It is so stupid of modern civilisation to have given up believing in the devil when he is the only explanation of it.

Gandhi


The individual choice of garnishment of a burger can be an important point to the consumer in this day when individualism is an increasingly important thing to people.

Gandhi Indira


When the speaker and he to whom he is speaks do not understand, that is metaphysics.

Gandhi Indira


"MOKE DAT YIGARETTE"

Gandhi Mahatma


Whatever doesn't succeed in two months and a half in California will never succeed.

Gandhi Mahatma


It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

Gandhi Mahatma


Plus ,ca change, plus c'est la m^eme chose. [The more things change, the more they remain the same.]

Gandhi Mahatma


I'll turn over a new leaf.

Garbers J.


If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.

Garfield


The Soviet pre-eminence in chess can be traced to the average Russian's readiness to brood obsessively over anything, even the arrangement of some pieces of wood. Indeed, the Russians' predisposition for quiet reflection followed by sudden preventi

Garrison William Lloyd


... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

Garrison Keillor


Any road followed to its end leads precisely nowhere. Climb the mountain just a little to test it's a mountain. From the top of the mountain, you cannot see the mountain.

Gary Gilmore


"I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment."

Gary Trudeau


Too much of everything is just enough.

Gasset Jos'e Ortega Y


She was good at playing abstract confusion in the same way a midget is good at being short.

Gauguin Paul


It has long been noticed that juries are pitiless for robbery and full of indulgence for infanticide. A question of interest, my dear Sir! The jury is afraid of being robbed and has passed the age when it could be a victim of infanticide.

Gauguin Paul


All art is but imitation of nature.

Gaulle Charles de


Mundus vult decipi decipiatur ergo.

Gaulle Charles de


Better late than never.

Gaultier Jules de


Walking on water wasn't built in a day.

Gauss


A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car.

Gauvreay Emile Henry


Satire is what closes Saturday night.

Gavin General James


A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

Geis R.


The price of success in philosophy is triviality.

Geis R.


Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.

Geis R.


It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. T

Gene Kirkwood


Human resources are human first, and resources second.

Genter Quentin


Out of sight is out of mind.

George


If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

George F. Baer railroad


When the blind lead the blind they will both fall over the cliff.

George Kennan


The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it.

George Saunder


Briefly stated, the findings are that when presented with an array of data or a sequence of events in which they are instructed to discover an underlying order, subjects show strong tendencies to perceive order and causality in random arrays, to perc

George Seldes


Perhaps no person can be a poet, or even enjoy poetry without a certain unsoundness of mind.

Gerald Weinberg


You get what you pay for.

Gerould Katharine Fullerton


The shortest distance between two points is under construction.

Gerrold David


It's not so hard to lift yourself by your bootstraps once you're off the ground.

Gerrold David


The most delightful day after the one on which you buy a cottage in the country is the one on which you resell it.

Gess Bene


In charity there is no excess.

Getty J. Paul


A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

Getty J.P.


A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that balances are correct.

Giancana Sam


My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.

Giancana Sam e


When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Gibbon Edward


Let sleeping dogs lie.

Gibbon Edward


If I had done everything I'm credited with, I'd be speaking to you from a laboratory jar at Harvard.

Gibbons Edward


And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

Gibran Kahlil


Who dat who say "who dat" when I say "who dat"?

Gibran Kahlil


The two most beautiful words in the English language are "Cheque Enclosed."

Gibran Kahlil


If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Gibson J.J.


The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

Giddens Gary


Good salesmen and good repairmen will never go hungry.

Gilbert W.S.


Silence is the element in which great things fashion themselves.

Gillette George Francis


God help those who do not help themselves.

Gilliam E.A.


A good scapegoat is hard to find. A guilty conscience is the mother of invention.

Ginsberg Allen


Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.

Ginsberg Allen


In breeding cattle you need one bull for every twenty-five cows, unless the cows are known sluts.

Giraudoux Jean


If you are shooting under 80 you are neglecting your business; over 80 you are neglecting your golf.

Giraudoux Jean


Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming.

Glymour. C.


If I had any humility I would be perfect.

Gnaeus Pompeius


You can bring men from other parts of the world who are sane. And you know what happens? At the very moment they cross those mountains... they go mad. Instantaneously and automatically, at the very moment they cross the mountains into California,

Gobeil Madeleine


Ignorance is the Mother of Devotion.

Godwin Gail


Chance is perhaps the work of God when He did not want to sign.

Goebbels Josef


"Cogito ergo I'm right and you're wrong."

Goering Hermann


Given a choice between grief and nothing, I'd choose grief.

Goering Hermann


The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Goethe


Nothing succeeds like excess.

Goethe


We should realize that a city is better off with bad laws, so long as they remain fixed, then with good laws that are constantly being altered, that the lack of learning combined with sound common sense is more helpful than the kind of cleverness th

Goethe


It is not enough that I should succeed. Others must fail.

Goethe


The proof of the pudding is in the eating.

Goethe


In a hierarchy every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence ... in time every post tends to be occupied by an employee who is incompetent to carry out its duties ... Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their

Goethe


If there were a school for, say, sheet metal workers, that after three years left its graduates as unprepared for their careers as does law school, it would be closed down in a minute, and no doubt by lawyers.

Goethe


If any man wishes to be humbled and mortified, let him become president of Harvard.

Goethe Johann Wolfgang von


A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the damned things is ample.

Goethe Johann van


God instructs the heart, not by ideas, but by pains and contradictions.

Gold Vic


Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest r

Gold Barry


The 'A' is for content, the 'minus' is for not typing it. Don't ever do this to my eyes again.

Goldenstern


I have ways of making money that you know nothing of.

Goldfinger Auric


Let me assure you that to us here at First National, you're not just a number. Youre two numbers, a dash, three more numbers, another dash and another number.

Goldthwait Bobcat


In this world, nothing is certain but death and taxes.

Goldwater Barry


Between 1950 and 1952, a bored weatherman, stationed north of Hudson Bay, left a monument that neither government nor time can eradicate. Using a bulldozer abandoned by the Air Force, he spent two years and great effort pushing boulders into a single

Goldwater Barry


Pauca sed matura. [Few but excellent.]

Goldwater Sen. Barry


If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Goldwater Senator Barry


I go on working for the same reason a hen goes on laying eggs.

Goldwater Barry


XLI: The more one produces, the less one gets. XLII: Simple systems are not feasible because they require infinite testing. XLIII: Hardware works best when it matters the least. XLIV: Aircraft flight in the 21st century will always be in a we

Goldwater Senator Barry


The primary cause of failure in electrical appliances is an expired warranty. Often, you can get an appliance running again simply by changing the warranty expiration date with a 15/64-inch felt-tipped marker.

Goldwyn Samuel


She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

Goldwyn Samuel


The confusion of a staff member is measured by the length of his memos.

Goldwyn Samuel


The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.

Gondorf Henry


A yawn is a silent shout.

Good Glynda the


One man's brain plus one other will produce one half as many ideas as one man would have produced alone. These two plus two more will produce half again as many ideas. These four plus four more begin to represent a creative meeting, and the ratio c

Goodman Saul


There is a good deal of solemn cant about the common interests of capital and labour. As matters stand, their only common interest is that of cutting each other's throat.

Gordon Karen Elizabeth


Do not use that foreign word "ideals". We have that excellent native word "lies".

Gordon George


We are governed not by armies and police but by ideas.

Gorin Amy


Every man thinks God is on his side. The rich and powerful know that he is.

Gorin Amy


Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Gould Jay


The only "ism" Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.

Gould Jay


I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's a knob called "brightness", but it doesn't seem to work.

Goulden Joseph C.


If what they've been doing hasn't solved the problem, tell them to do something else.

Goulden Joseph C.


If you live long enough, you'll see that every victory turns into a defeat.

Goulden Joseph C.


The plot was designed in a light vein that somehow became varicose.

Grant Cary


All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for fun. Money's just the way we keep score.

Grant Cary


Business will be either better or worse.

Gravy Wavy


"You would do well not to imagine profundity," he said. "Anything that seems of momentous occasion should be dwelt upon as though it were of slight note. Conversely, trivialities must be attended to with the greatest of care. Because death is moment

Gregory Dick


May you live in uninteresting times.

Greville Fulke


The Hollywood tradition I like best is called "sucking up to the stars."

Grogan Emmett


A violent man will die a violent death.

Groucho Marx


All hope abandon, ye who enter here!

Grover


The `loner' may be respected, but he is always resented by his colleagues, for he seems to be passing a critical judgment on them, when he may be simply making a limiting statement about himself.

Guaspari David


"Whom are you?" said he, for he had been to night school.

Guido Mark


We're constantly being bombarded by insulting and humiliating music, which people are making for you the way they make those Wonder Bread products. Just as food can be bad for your system, music can be bad for your spirtual and emotional feelings. I

Guindon


You're all clear now, kid. Now blow this thing so we can all go home.

Guindon


A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation. It takes an abundance of imagination, to be sure.

Guiness


Go away, I'm all right.

Guiness


XI: If the Earth could be made to rotate twice as fast, managers would get twice as much done. If the Earth could be made to rotate twenty times as fast, everyone else would get twice as much done since all the managers would fly off. XII: I

Gusenberg Frank


What an author likes to write most is his signature on the back of a cheque.

Guthrie Arlo


He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world as he who is ready to die.

Guzik Jake


Like ya know? Rock 'N Roll is an esoteric language that unlocks the creativity chambers in people's brains, and like totally activates their essential hipness, which of course is like totally necessary for saving the earth, like because the first th

Guzman Adolfo


Charity begins at home.

Gween Actor Edmond


To have died once is enough.

Gyles Brandreth





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Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more.
Hallock Addison H.

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