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During almost fifteen centuries the legal establishment of Christianity has
been upon trial. What has been its fruits? More or less, in all places,
pride and indolence in the clergy; ignorance and servility in the laity,;
in both, superstition, bigo La Rouchefoucauld
At ebb tide I wrote a line upon the sand, and gave it all my heart and all
my soul. At flood tide I returned to read what I had inscribed and found my
ignorance upon the shore.
 Lady Whiteadder
... Our second completely true news item was sent to me by Mr. H. Boyce
Connell Jr. of Atlanta, Ga., where he is involved in a law firm. One thing
I like about the South is, folks there care about tradition. If somebody
gets handed a name like "H.  Lafferty
R. A.
Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.
 Lai
Chou En
The very first essential for success is a perpetually constant and regular
employment of violence.
 Lampoon
The Harvard
of the time.
 Landers
Ann
A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I
believe everything positively stinks.
 Lang
Andrew
The Least Successful Collector
Betsy Baker played a central role in the history of collecting. She
was employed as a servant in the house of John Warburton (1682-1759) who had
amassed a fine collection of 58 first edition plays, including most of t Langan L.M.
He has not acquired a fortune; the fortune has acquired him.
 Lao Tsu
CF&C stole it, fair and square.
 Lara
Michael
You should never wear your best trousers when you go out to fight for
freedom and liberty.
 Lara
Michael
If you don't count some of Jehovah's injunctions, there are no humorists
in the Bible.
 Lardner
David
Work is the crab grass in the lawn of life.
 Lardner
Ring
The best executive is one who has sense enough to pick good people to do
what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with
them while they do it.
 Lardner
Ring
Many hands make light work.
 Larry Niven
If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it
is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.
 Larsen Dalglish
The seven deadly sins ... Food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability
and children. Nothing can lift those seven milestones from man's neck but
money; and the spirit cannot soar until the milestones are lifted.
 Larson
Erik
A rolling stone gathers no moss.
 Lascl
Christopher
The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
 Laukikanyay.
Scrubbing floors and emptying bedpans has as much dignity as the Presidency.
 Lazarus
All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for fun.
Money's just the way we keep score.
 Lazarus Long
There is nothing wrong with Southern California that a rise in the
ocean level wouldn't cure.
 LeBoutillier
J.
I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World
War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.
 LeGuin
Ursula K.
"Listen to what I say, not what I mean. I mean ...."
 Lear
King
The forest is safe because a lion lives therein and the lion is safe because
it lives in a forest. Likewise the friendship of persons rests on mutual help.
 Leary
Tim
"After I asked him what he meant, he replied that freedom consisted of
the unimpeded right to get rich, to use his ability, no matter what the
cost to others, to win advancement."
 Lebowitz Fran
The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed
ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.
 Lebowitz Fran
Campus sidewalks never exist as the straightest line between two points.
 Lebowitz Fran
Life sucks, but death doesn't put out at all.
 Lebowitz Fran
American cars are made shoddily... Cars made overseas are far superior.
 Leghorn
Foghorn
The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any
reward.
 Leghorn
Foghorn
After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from
Heaven. As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought,
and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon
to be created."
"This is true," He replied.
 Leghorn
Foghorn
Facts, apart from their relationships, are like labels on empty bottles.
 Lehman John
If you have seen one city slum you have seen them all.
 Lehrer
Tom
Go ahead... make my day.
 Lehrer
Tom
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not
become a monster. And when you look into an abyss, the abyss also looks
into you.
 Lehrer
Tom
If little green men land in your back yard, hide any little green women
you've got in the house.
 Lem
Stanislaw
The first sign of corruption in a society that is still alive is that
the end justifies the means.
 Lem
Stanislaw
A businessman is a hybrid of a dancer and a calculator.
 Len Cool
I've got all the money I'll ever need if I die by 4 o'clock.
 Lenin
Vladimir Il'ich
"Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I'm rich."
 Lenin
"The policeman isn't there to create disorder. The policeman is
there to ________preserve disorder."
 Lennon
John
From the cradle to the coffin underwear comes first.
 Lennon John
Sho' they got to have it against the law. Shoot, ever'body git high,
they wouldn't be nobody git up and feed the chickens. Hee-hee.
 Leo Rosten
History is nothing but a collection of fables and useless trifles,
cluttered up with a mass of unnecessary figures and proper names.
 LeoGrande William
Think sideways!
 Leonard
Ohio Lt. Governor Paul
Why my thoughts are my own, when they are in, but when they are out they
are another's.
 Leopardi
Giacomo
It is generally agreed that "Hello" is an appropriate greeting because
if you entered a room and said "Goodbye," it could confuse a lot of people.
 Lerner
Max
When there are two conflicting versions of the story, the wise course
is to believe the one in which people appear at their worst.
 Leslie Stephen
War hath no fury like a non-combatant.
 Leslie Stephen
If a thing's worth doing, it is worth doing badly.
 Lester
Julius
Some men are heterosexual, and some are bisexual, and some men don't think
about sex at all... they become lawyers.
 Letterman
David
Every word is like an unnecessary stain on silence and nothingness.
 Letterman
David
The more laws and order are made prominent, the more thieves and
robbers there will be.
 Letterman
David
You can't have your cake and let your neighbor eat it too.
 Letterman
David
Adde parvum parvo manus acervus erit.
[Add little to little and there will be a big pile.]
 Letterman
David
I try not to break the rules but merely to test their elasticity.
 Letterman
David
NAPOLEON: What shall we do with this soldier, Giuseppe? Everything he
says is wrong.
GIUSEPPE: Make him a general, Excellency, and then everything he says
will be right.
 Letterman
David
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary
safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
 Letterman
David
She applies her lipstick in spite of its contents: "greasy rouge,
containing crushed and dried insect corpses for coloring, beeswax for
stiffness, and olive oil to help it flow - the latter having the
unfortunate tendency to go rancid several hours a Levant
Oscar
It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our
offense consists in doubting it.
 Levant
Oscar
Writing is turning one's worst moments into money.
 Levin
Bernard
Call on God, but row away from the rocks.
 Levine
Joseph E.
The whole earth is in jail and we're plotting this incredible jailbreak.
 Levinson
Leonard
We give advice, but we cannot give the wisdom to profit by it.
 Lew Sinclair
Ain't no right way to do a wrong thing.
 Lewin
Ralph
I think we're in trouble.
 Lewis
C.S.
The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor,
to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.
 Lewis
C.S.
Every man who has reached even his intellectual teens begins to suspect
that life is no farce; that it is not genteel comedy even; that it flowers
and fructifies on the contrary out of the profoundest tragic depths of the
essential death in which its Lewis
Joe E.
I had never been too political, but I knew how white people treated black
people and it was hard for me to come back to the bullshit white people
put a black person through in this country. To realize you don't have any
power to make things differen Lewis
Joe E.
Nothing succeeds like excess.
 Lewis
Richard
Not to laugh, not to lament, not to curse, but to understand.
 Lewis
Sinclair
You can't hold a man down without staying down with him.
 Lewis Thomas
Let me take you a button-hole lower.
 Li Woman's
As Gen. de Gaulle occassionally acknowledges America to be the daughter
of Europe, so I am pleased to come to Yale, the daughter of Harvard.
 Li Mark Twain
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely
rearranging their prejudices.
 Lie
Trygve
A real diplomat is one who can cut his neighbor's throat without having
his neighbour notice it.
 Liebling
A.J.
Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt
of gratitude we owe to Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He
brought death into the world.
 Liebling A.J.
We prefer to believe that the absence of inverted commas guarantees the
originality of a thought, whereas it may be merely that the utterer has
forgotten its source.
 Liepmann
Hans
The last vestiges of the old Republic have been swept away.
 Lieutenant Kermit Tyler
I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.
 Lilly
John
Slaves are generally expected to sing as well as to work ... I did not, when
a slave, understand the deep meanings of those rude, and apparently incoherent
songs. I was myself within the circle, so that I neither saw nor heard as
those without might Lincoln
A.
Eggheads unite! You have nothing to lose but your yolks.
 Lincoln
Abraham
They also serve who only stand and wait.
 Lincoln
Abraham
You know it's Monday when you wake up and it's Tuesday.
 Lincoln
Abraham
It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.
 Lincoln
Abraham
You have not converted a man because you have silenced him.
 Lincoln
Abraham
I dread success. To have succeeded is to have finished one's business on
earth, like the male spider, who is killed by the female the moment he has
succeeded in his courtship. I like a state of continual becoming, with a
goal in front and not behin Lincoln
Abraham
One measure of friendship consists not in the number of things friends
can discuss, but in the number of things they need no longer mention.
 Lincoln
Abraham
I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve
immortality through not dying.
 Lincoln
Abraham
An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose.
 Lindbergh
Charles
Anything anybody can say about America is true.
 Ling
James J.
I went into the business for the money, and the art grew out of it. If
people are disillusioned by that remark, I can't help it. It's the truth.
 Lippmann
Walter
Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.
 Lippmann
Walter
Piece of cake!
 Little
Mary Wilson
If the weather is extremely bad, church attendance will be down. If
the weather is extremely good, church attendance will be down. If the
bulletin covers are in short supply, however, church attendance will
exceed all expectations.
 Little
Rich
The world is full of people who have never, since childhood, met an
open doorway with an open mind.
 Lloyd Kaufman
The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first
half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and
pleasant, the second half still balmy and quite pleasant for those who
hadn't heard the scream at all, but not c Lo graffito in
We have lingered long enough on the shores of the Cosmic Ocean.
 Locke
John
The naked truth of it is, I have no shirt.
 Lockridge Ross
We should realize that a city is better off with bad laws, so long as they
remain fixed, then with good laws that are constantly being altered, that
the lack of learning combined with sound common sense is more helpful than
the kind of cleverness th Long
Lazarus
A Polish worker walks into a bank to deposit his paycheck. He has heard
about Poland's economic problems, and he asks what would happen to his
money if the bank collapsed. "All of our deposits are guaranteed by the
finance ministry, sir," the telle Long
Lazarus
"We should declare war on North Vietnam. We could pave the whole
country and put parking strips on it, and still be home by Christmas."
 Long
Lazarus
The superpowers often behave like two heavily armed blind men feeling
their way around a room, each believing himself in mortal peril from the
other, whom he assumes to have perfect vision. Each tends to ascribe to
the other side a consistency, fors Long
Lazarus
I pledge allegiance to the flag
of the United States of America
and to the republic for which it stands,
one nation,
indivisible,
with liberty
and justice for all.
 Long
Lazarus
An aphorism is never exactly true; it is either a half-truth or
one-and-a-half truths.
 Long
Lazarus
If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it's still a foolish thing.
 Long
Lazarus
Things are not always what they seem.
 Long
Lazarus
The adjuration to be "normal" seems shockingly repellent to me; I see neither
hope nor comfort in sinking to that low level. I think it is ignorance that
makes people think of abnormality only with horror and allows them to remain
undismayed at the  Long
Lazarus
Why, when no honest man will deny in private that every ultimate problem is
wrapped in the profoundest mystery, do honest men proclaim in pulpits that
unhesitating certainty is the duty of the most foolish and ignorant? Is it
not a spectacle to make Long
Lazarus
Liberty is always dangerous, but it is the safest thing we have.
 Long
Russell
If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing
of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur
of this life.
 Longfellow
H.W.
Speak softly and own a big, mean Doberman.
 Longworth
A. R.
A new taste had been acquired and a new appetite began to grow. The time
had long since arrived to crush the technical intelligentsia, which had
come to regard itself as too irreplaceable and had not gotten used to
catching instructions on the wing. Longworth
Alice Roosevelt
A man who cannot seduce men cannot save them either.
 Longworth
Alice Roosevelt
If a nation values anything more than freedom, it will lose its freedom;
and the irony of it is that if it is comfort or money it values more, it
will lose that, too.
 Longworth
Alice Roosevelt
Since we have to speak well of the dead, let's knock them while they're alive.
 Loo Lewis Carroll
In the misfortune of our friends we find something that is not displeasing
to us.
 Louder P.G
All I know is what the words know, and dead things, and that
makes a handsome little sum, with a beginning and a middle and
an end, as in the well-built phrase and the long sonata of the dead.
 Louder P.G.
Try not to have a good time ... This is supposed to be educational.
 Louder P.G. Wodehouse
Richard Nixon was the most dishonest individual I have ever met in my life.
He lied to his wife, his family, his friends, his colleagues in the Congress,
lifetime members of his own political party, the American people, and
the world.
 Louisi Edwin Edwards
Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do
the work.
 Lowell
James Russell
A right is not what someone gives you; it's what no one can take from you.
 Lowell
Robert
If you don't have a nasty obituary you probably didn't matter.
 Lowell James Russell
If while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel
in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary
qualifications, that field's employment market is glutted.
 Lubbock
John
The goys have proven the following theorem...
 Luce
C.B.
It seems to me that nearly every woman I know wants a man who knows how
to love with authority. Women are simple souls who like simple things,
and one of the simplest is one of the simplest to give. ... Our family
airedale will come clear across t Luce
Clare Booth
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
 Lucinda Childs
It is exactly because a man cannot do a thing that he is a proper judge of it.
 Lula Pace Ripley
It is indeed desirable to be well descended, but the glory belongs to
our ancestors.
 Lumsden
Marshall
The white race is the cancer of history.
 Lur Terry Pratchett
Now, you might ask, "How do I get one of those complete home tool
sets for under $4?" An excellent question.
Go to one of those really cheap discount stores where they sell
plastic furniture in colors visible from the planet Neptune and where they
 Lustbader
Eric Van
Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.
 Luten
Daniel B.
We should have a great many fewer disputes in the world if only words were
taken for what they are, the signs of our ideas only, and not for things
themselves.
 Luten
Daniel B.
Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of
the beholder.
 Luther
Martin
The public is an old woman. Let her maunder and mumble.
 Luther
Martin
The problem that we thought was a problem was, indeed, a problem, but
not the problem we thought was the problem.
 Luther
Martin
You k'n hide de fier, but w'at you gwine do wid de smoke?
 Lyly
John
Put a rogue in the limelight and he will act like an honest man.
 Lynch
Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is
oblivion.
 lose.
until you
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Random Quote
"If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think
little of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and
Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination."
 Thomas De Quincey
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