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The rights and interests of the laboring man will be protected and cared for not by our labor agitators, but by the Christian men to whom God in his infinite wisdom has given control of property interests of the country, and upon the successful manag

La Rouchefoucauld


The man with the best job in the country is the Vice President. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, "How's the President?"

Lady Whiteadder


If a guru falls in the forest with no one to hear him, was he really a guru at all?

Lafferty R. A.


The human animal differs from the lesser primates in his passion for lists of "Ten Best".

Lai Chou En


"If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination."

Lampoon The Harvard


While there's life, there's hope.

Landers Ann


Housework can kill you if done right.

Lang Andrew


In this world, nothing is certain but death and taxes.

Langan L.M.


"You and I as individuals can, by borrowing, live beyond our means, but only for a limited period of time. Why should we think that collectively, as a nation, we are not bound by that same limitation?"

Lao Tsu


Lo! Men have become the tool of their tools.

Lara Michael


The difference between a misfortune and a calamity? If Gladstone fell into the Thames, it would be a misfortune. But if someone dragged him out again, it would be a calamity.

Lara Michael


If we see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's the light of an oncoming train.

Lardner David


I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forego their use.

Lardner Ring


I needed the good will of the legislature of four states. I formed the legislative bodies with my own money. I found that it was cheaper that way.

Lardner Ring


Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Larry Niven


The only "ism" Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.

Larsen Dalglish


Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original and the part that is original is not good.

Larson Erik


Don't vote

Lascl Christopher


"Here's the holiday schedule for Monday's observation of Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday, when the following will be closed: * Governmental offices * Post offices * Libraries * Schools * Banks * Parts of Palm Beach and the mind of Se

Laukikanyay.


Someday, Weederman, we'll look back on all this and laugh... It will probably be one of those deep, eerie ones that slowly builds to a blood-curdling maniacal scream... but still it will be a laugh.

Lazarus


What a bonanza! An unknown beginner to be directed by Lubitsch, in a script by Wilder and Brackett, and to play with Paramount's two superstars, Gary Cooper and Claudette Colbert, and to be beaten up by both of them!

Lazarus Long


"Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet. As you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney. Do you have a car or a job? Do you ever

LeBoutillier J.


A journey of a thousand miles starts under one's feet.

LeGuin Ursula K.


That government is best which governs least.

Lear King


Under a government which imprisons any unjustly, the true place for a just man is also a prison.

Leary Tim


Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.

Lebowitz Fran


"I only touch base with reality on an as-needed basis!"

Lebowitz Fran


One good turn asketh another.

Lebowitz Fran


The older I grow, the less important the comma becomes. Let the reader catch his own breath.

Lebowitz Fran


Many a long dispute between divines may thus be abridged: It is so. It is not so. It is so. It is not so.

Leghorn Foghorn


A violent man will die a violent death.

Leghorn Foghorn


So many men, so many opinions; every one his own way.

Leghorn Foghorn


It is through symbols that man consciously or unconsciously lives, works and has his being.

Lehman John


The two most beautiful words in the English language are "Cheque Enclosed."

Lehrer Tom


Necessity hath no law.

Lehrer Tom


Being a miner, as soon as you're too old and tired and sick and stupid to do your job properly, you have to go, where the very opposite applies with the judges.

Lehrer Tom


A racially integrated community is a chronological term timed from the entrance of the first black family to the exit of the last white family.

Lem Stanislaw


Politicians speak for their parties, and parties never are, never have been, and never will be wrong.

Lem Stanislaw


Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.

Len Cool


Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.

Lenin Vladimir Il'ich


Harp not on that string.

Lenin


The big cities of America are becoming Third World countries.

Lennon John


There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit at a typewriter and open a vein.

Lennon John


Tax reform means "Don't tax you, don't tax me, tax that fellow behind the tree."

Leo Rosten


One hundred women are not worth a single testicle.

LeoGrande William


I went to my mother and told her I intended to commence a different life. I asked for and obtained her blessing and at once commenced the career of a robber.

Leonard Ohio Lt. Governor Paul


Just remember, wherever you go, there you are.

Leopardi Giacomo


Several years ago, some smart businessmen had an idea: Why not build a big store where a do-it-yourselfer could get everything he needed at reasonable prices? Then they decided, nah, the hell with that, let's build a home center. And before long ho

Lerner Max


Art is either plagiarism or revolution.

Leslie Stephen


It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish.

Leslie Stephen


Indeed, the first noble truth of Buddhism, usually translated as `all life is suffering,' is more accurately rendered `life is filled with a sense of pervasive unsatisfactoriness.'

Lester Julius


Politics and the fate of mankind are formed by men without ideals and without greatness. Those who have greatness within them do not go in for politics.

Letterman David


The way I understand it, the Russians are sort of a combination of evil and incompetence... sort of like the Post Office with tanks.

Letterman David


"One Saturday afternoon, during the campaign to decide whether or not there should be a Coastal Commission, I took a helicopter ride from Los Angeles to San Diego. We passed several state beaches, some crowded and some virtually empty. They had the

Letterman David


I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Letterman David


If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it's still a foolish thing.

Letterman David


People in general do not willingly read if they have anything else to amuse them.

Letterman David


Moneyliness is next to Godliness.

Letterman David


If we can ever make red tape nutritional, we can feed the world.

Letterman David


I have often looked at women and committed adultery in my heart.

Levant Oscar


I hate quotations.

Levant Oscar


Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them.

Levin Bernard


The less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.

Levine Joseph E.


"Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company."

Levinson Leonard


There's no such thing as an original sin.

Lew Sinclair


Age before beauty; and pearls before swine.

Lewin Ralph


A kind of Batman of contemporary letters.

Lewis C.S.


... A solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.

Lewis C.S.


Too much of everything is just enough.

Lewis Joe E.


Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.

Lewis Joe E.


Playing an unamplified electric guitar is like strumming on a picnic table.

Lewis Richard


Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, particularly if the goods are worthless.

Lewis Sinclair


Tip O'Neill is just like Congress; old, fat and out of control.

Lewis Thomas


It's is not, it isn't ain't, and it's it's, not its, if you mean it is. If you don't, it's its. Then too, it's hers. It isn't her's. It isn't our's either. It's ours, and likewise yours and theirs.

Li Woman's


Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny.

Li Mark Twain


Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.

Lie Trygve


Leave no stone unturned.

Liebling A.J.


Luck can't last a lifetime, unless you die young.

Liebling A.J.


Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash.

Liepmann Hans


The polite thing to do has always been to address people as they wish to be addressed, to treat them in a way they think dignified. But it is equally important to accept and tolerate different standards of courtesy, not expecting everyone else to ad

Lieutenant Kermit Tyler


Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine.

Lilly John


Yet creeds mean very little, Coth answered the dark god, still speaking almost gently. The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.

Lincoln A.


Acting is not very hard. The most important things are to be able to laugh and cry. If I have to cry, I think of my sex life. And if I have to laugh, well, I think of my sex life.

Lincoln Abraham


Some people say a front-engine car handles best. Some people say a rear-engine car handles best. I say a rented car handles best.

Lincoln Abraham


I go the way that Providence dictates.

Lincoln Abraham


Diplomacy is to do and say, the nastiest thing in the nicest way.

Lincoln Abraham


Money is truthful. If a man speaks of his honor, make him pay cash.

Lincoln Abraham


I just got off the phone with Sonny Barger [President of the Hell's Angels]. He wants me to appear as a character witness for him at his murder trial and said he'd be glad to appear as a character witness on my behalf if I ever needed one. Needless

Lincoln Abraham


Facts, apart from their relationships, are like labels on empty bottles.

Lincoln Abraham


Take your work seriously but never take yourself seriously; and do not take what happens either to yourself or your work seriously.

Lincoln Abraham


A priest asked: What is Fate, Master? And the Master answered: It is that which gives a beast of burden its reason for existence. It is that which men in former times had to bear upon their backs. It is that which has caused nations to build bywa

Lindbergh Charles


Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art.

Ling James J.


The use of money is all the advantage there is to having money.

Lippmann Walter


Veni, vidi, vici. [I came, I saw, I conquered].

Lippmann Walter


Generally speaking, the Way of the warrior is resolute acceptance of death.

Little Mary Wilson


I might have gone to West Point, but I was too proud to speak to a congressman.

Little Rich


Never tell people how to do things. Tell them WHAT to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.

Lloyd Kaufman


Historians have now definitely established that Juan Cabrillo, discoverer of California, was not looking for Kansas, thus setting a precedent that continues to this day.

Lo graffito in


Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.

Locke John


The more laws and order are made prominent, the more thieves and robbers there will be.

Lockridge Ross


The streets were dark with something more than night.

Long Lazarus


An older student came to Otis and said, "I have been to see a great number of teachers and I have given up a great number of pleasures. I have fasted, been celibate and stayed awake nights seeking enlightenment. I have given up everything I was aske

Long Lazarus


The Priest's grey nimbus in a niche where he dressed discreetly. I will not sleep here tonight. Home also I cannot go. A voice, sweetened and sustained, called to him from the sea. Turning the curve he waved his hand. A sleek brown head, a seal's,

Long Lazarus


The world is full of people who have never, since childhood, met an open doorway with an open mind.

Long Lazarus


No good deed goes unpunished.

Long Lazarus


If you hype something and it succeeds, you're a genius

Long Lazarus


He that breaks a thing to find out what it is has left the path of wisdom.

Long Lazarus


The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any

Long Lazarus


Diplomacy is the art of letting the other party have things your way.

Long Lazarus


The nearer to the church, the further from God.

Long Lazarus


If they were so inclined, they could impeach him because they don't like his necktie.

Long Russell


Why be a man when you can be a success?

Longfellow H.W.


If atheism is to be used to express the state of mind in which God is identified with the unknowable, and theology is pronounced to be a collection of meaningless words about unintelligible chimeras, then I have no doubt, and I think few people doubt

Longworth A. R.


Being a woman is a terribly difficult trade, since it consists principally of dealings with men.

Longworth Alice Roosevelt


If God wanted us to have a President, He would have sent us a candidate.

Longworth Alice Roosevelt


Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?

Longworth Alice Roosevelt


My band career ended late in my senior year when John Cooper and I threw my amplifier out the dormitory window. We did not act in haste. First we checked to make sure the amplifier would fit through the frame, using the belt from my bathrobe to meas

Loo Lewis Carroll


Free Speech Is The Right To Shout 'Theater' In A Crowded Fire.

Louder P.G


"We should declare war on North Vietnam. We could pave the whole country and put parking strips on it, and still be home by Christmas."

Louder P.G.


When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to

Louder P.G. Wodehouse


I would like the government to do all it can to mitigate, then, in understanding, in mutuality of interest, in concern for the common good, our tasks will be solved.

Louisi Edwin Edwards


The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.

Lowell James Russell


If you would know the value of money, go try to borrow some.

Lowell Robert


What we cannot speak about we must pass over in silence.

Lowell James Russell


If Beethoven's Seventh Symphony is not by some means abridged, it will soon fall into disuse.

Lubbock John


If God lived on Earth, people would knock out all His windows.

Luce C.B.


In America, any boy may become president and I suppose that's just one of the risks he takes.

Luce Clare Booth


There's nothing in the middle of the road but yellow stripes and dead armadillos.

Lucinda Childs


C'est magnifique, mais ce n'est pas la guerre! [It is magnificent, but it is not war]

Lula Pace Ripley


She ran the gamut of emotions from 'A' to 'B'.

Lumsden Marshall


Nothing succeeds like excess.

Lur Terry Pratchett


One of my less pleasant chores when I was young was to read the Bible from one end to the other. Reading the Bible straight through is at least 70 percent discipline, like learning Latin. But the good parts are, of course, simply amazing. God is a

Lustbader Eric Van


A committee takes root and grows, it flowers, wilts and dies, scattering the seed from which other committees will bloom.

Luten Daniel B.


I have a dream. I have a dream that one day, on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slaveowners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

Luten Daniel B.


All the taxes paid over a lifetime by the average American are spent by the government in less than a second.

Luther Martin


The world is your exercise-book, the pages on which you do your sums. It is not reality, although you can express reality there if you wish. You are also free to write nonsense, or lies, or to tear the pages.

Luther Martin


When you are at Rome live in the Roman style; when you are elsewhere live as they live elsewhere.

Luther Martin


We should keep the Panama Canal. After all, we stole it fair and square.

Lyly John


Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation.

Lynch


It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.

lose. until you





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When in doubt, do it. It's much easier to apologize than to get permission.
Hopper Grace Murray

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