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Our business in life is not to succeed but to continue to fail in high spirits.

P Harry Thurston


Education is learning what you didn't even know you didn't know.

Pa Long Chen


Or you or I must yield up his life to Ahrimanes. I would rather it were you. I should have no hesitation in sacrificing my own life to spare yours, but we take stock next week, and it would not be fair on the company.

Pa Jessie


It looks like it's up to me to save our skins. Get into that garbage chute, flyboy!

Paar Jack


You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred.

Paar Jack


All this wheeling and dealing around, why, it isn't for money, it's for fun. Money's just the way we keep score.

Paine Thomas


We all live in a state of ambitious poverty.

Paine Thomas


I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.

Palindromist The Mad


Have you ever stopped to think what it would be like to have a woman President? "I can't deal with the Russians today. Not now. I've got my period."

Parker Dorothy


Flame on!

Parker Dorothy


I understand why you're confused. You're thinking too much.

Parker Dorothy


If happiness is in your destiny, you need not be in a hurry.

Parker Dorothy


Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius; will you remember to pay the debt?

Parker Dorothy


The only alliance I would make with the Women's Liberation Movement is in bed.

Parker Dorothy


Education and religion are two things not regulated by supply and demand. The less of either the people have, the less they want.

Parker Dorthy


Any two philosophers can tell each other all they know in two hours.

Parker Robert


Hotels are tired of getting ripped off. I checked into a hotel and they had towels from my house.

Parkinson


Who goeth a-borrowing goeth a-sorrowing.

Parkinson C.N.


Where it is a duty to worship the sun it is pretty sure to be a crime to examine the laws of heat.

Parkinson C.N.


Generally speaking, the Way of the warrior is resolute acceptance of death.

Parnas Dave


The time spent on any item of the agenda [of a finance committee] will be in inverse proportion to the sum involved.

Pascal Blaise


The lawgiver, of all beings, most owes the law allegiance. He of all men should behave as though the law compelled him. But it is the universal weakness of mankind that what we are given to administer we presently imagine we own.

Pascal Blaise


At ebb tide I wrote a line upon the sand, and gave it all my heart and all my soul. At flood tide I returned to read what I had inscribed and found my ignorance upon the shore.

Pascal Blaise


There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit at a typewriter and open a vein.

Pasteur L.


The course of true anything never does run smooth.

Pat Cadigan


I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Pat Cadigan


Since everything in life is but an experience perfect in being what it is, having nothing to do with good or bad, acceptance or rejection, one may well burst out in laughter.

Patricia O Tuama


Don't get mad, get even.

Patrick Saint


Plots are like girdles. Hidden, they hold your interest; revealed, they're of no interest except to fetishists. Like girdles, they attempt to contain an uncontainable experience.

Patton


I know on which side my bread is buttered.

Paul Erdman


An office party is not, as is sometimes supposed the Managing Director's chance to kiss the tea-girl. It is the tea-girl's chance to kiss the Managing Director (however bizarre an ambition this may seem to anyone who has seen the Managing Director f

Paul Tillich German


To do two things at once is to do neither.

Pelt Lucy Van


Confucius say too much.

Penn Jillette


"Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing."

Penn William


With all the talent around, it's sort of amazing that a woman could be up here with us.

Perce Chief Joseph


[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Perelman S.J.


Some performers on television appear to be horrible people, but when you finally get to know them in person, they turn out to be even worse.

Pericles


When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Perlis Alan J.


Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten.

Peter Dr. Laurence J.


The only problem with seeing too much is that it makes you insane.

Peter Dr. Laurence J.


HR 3128. Omnibus Budget Reconciliation, Fiscal 1986. Martin, R-Ill., motion that the House recede from its disagreement to the Senate amendment making changes in the bill to reduce fiscal 1986 deficits. The Senate amendment was an amendment to the

Peter Irene


The major sin is the sin of being born.

Peter Laurence


A woman employs sincerity only when every other form of deception has failed.

Peter Laurence J.


Instead of loving your enemies, treat your friends a little better.

Peter Laurence J.


Even if you do learn to speak correct English, whom are you going to speak it to?

Peter Stack


The primary cause of failure in electrical appliances is an expired warranty. Often, you can get an appliance running again simply by changing the warranty expiration date with a 15/64-inch felt-tipped marker.

Peter Straub


Things are more like they are today than they ever were before.

Petronius Gaius


Sometimes a man who deserves to be looked down upon because he is a fool is despised only because he is a lawyer.

Phaedrus


The plot was designed in a light vein that somehow became varicose.

Phaedrus


If you are shooting under 80 you are neglecting your business; over 80 you are neglecting your golf.

Phaedrus


When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money.

Philip Hale Boston


The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.

Philips Emo


Silence is the element in which great things fashion themselves.

Phillips Emo


I went into a bar feeling a little depressed, the bartender said, "What'll you have, Bud"? I said," I don't know, surprise me". So he showed me a nude picture of my wife.

Phillips Utah


The past always looks better than it was. It's only pleasant because it isn't here.

Physicist John von Neumann


There is no doubt that my lawyer is honest. For example, when he filed his income tax return last year, he declared half of his salary as 'unearned income.'

Picasso


He that composes himself is wiser than he that composes a book.

Picasso


If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem.

Picasso Pablo


"Given the choice between accomplishing something and just lying around, I'd rather lie around. No contest."

Pike Bishop James


If you lose a son you can always get another, but there's only one Maltese Falcon.

Pile Stephen


Luck can't last a lifetime, unless you die young.

Pile Stephen


Then, gently touching my face, she hesitated for a moment as her incredible eyes poured forth into mine love, joy, pain, tragedy, acceptance, and peace. "'Bye for now," she said warmly.

Pile Stephen


Well, he thought, since neither Aristotelian Logic nor the disciplines of Science seemed to offer much hope, it's time to go beyond them... Drawing a few deep even breaths, he entered a mental state practiced only by Masters of the Universal Way of

Pile Stephen


You're all clear now, kid. Now blow this thing so we can all go home.

Pile Stephen


One of your most ancient writers, a historian named Herodotus, tells of a thief who was to be executed. As he was taken away he made a bargain with the king: in one year he would teach the king's favorite horse to sing hymns. The other prisoners wa

Pindar


The most costly of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true. It is the chief occupation of mankind.

Pindar


Let's say your wedding ring falls into your toaster, and when you stick your hand in to retrieve it, you suffer Pain and Suffering as well as Mental Anguish. You would sue: * The toaster manufacturer, for failure to include, in the instructions

Pinero Sir Arthur Wing


By perseverance the snail reached the Ark.

Pintauro Joseph


The first rule of all intelligent tinkering is to keep all the parts.

Pirsig Robert


I love treason but hate a traitor.

Platford Lois


Beggars should be no choosers.

Plato


American business long ago gave up on demanding that prospective employees be honest and hardworking. It has even stopped hoping for employees who are educated enough that they can tell the difference between the men's room and the women's room with

Plato


Don't guess

Plato


The problem that we thought was a problem was, indeed, a problem, but not the problem we thought was the problem.

Plato


It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years.

Plato


All phone calls are obscene.

Plato


Here's to women. Would that we could fall into her arms without falling into her hands.

Plautus Titus Maccius


The day advanced as if to light some work of mine; it was morning, and lo! now it is evening, and nothing memorable is accomplished.

Plautus Titus Maccius


A violent man will die a violent death.

Plautus Titus Maccius


A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.

Player Willis


The ratio of literacy to illiteracy is a constant, but nowadays the illiterates can read.

Plotinus


"The jig's up, Elman." "Which jig?"

Plummer Christopher


Zero Mostel: That's it baby! When you got it, flaunt it! Flaunt it!

Plutarch


I need another lawyer like I need another hole in my head.

Pollard John G.


Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all.

Pooh-Bah


Do not use that foreign word "ideals". We have that excellent native word "lies".

Pope


Mum's the word.

Pope Alexander


A priest asked: What is Fate, Master? And the Master answered: It is that which gives a beast of burden its reason for existence. It is that which men in former times had to bear upon their backs. It is that which has caused nations to build bywa

Pope Alexander


Remembering is for those who have forgotten.

Pope John Paul


If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

Pope St. Gregory


The world is your exercise-book, the pages on which you do your sums. It is not reality, although you can express reality there if you wish. You are also free to write nonsense, or lies, or to tear the pages.

Poppins Mary


Ask not for whom the Bell tolls, and you will pay only the station-to-station rate.

Postmas James


A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

Pournelle Niven and


When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

Powers Richard


The final delusion is the belief that one has lost all delusions.

Prabhupada Swami


It is when I struggle to be brief that I become obscure.

Prentice George D.


The Worst Musical Trio There are few bad musicians who have a chance to give a recital at a famous concert hall while still learning the rudiments of their instrument. This happened about thirty years ago to the son of a Rumanian gentleman who was

President Pat Paulsen for


When you are at Rome live in the Roman style; when you are elsewhere live as they live elsewhere.

Presley Elvis


Love may laugh at locksmiths, but he has a profound respect for money bags.

Presley Elvis


Necessity hath no law.

Price Don


A jury consists of twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

Prochnow Herbert


A society in which women are taught anything but the management of a family, the care of men, and the creation of the future generation is a society which is on its way out.

Prochnow Herbert V.


None love the bearer of bad news.

Professor English


Sho' they got to have it against the law. Shoot, ever'body git high, they wouldn't be nobody git up and feed the chickens. Hee-hee.

Prosser D. Winkel and F.


Three minutes' thought would suffice to find this out; but thought is irksome and three minutes is a long time.

Protagoras


VI: A hungry dog hunts best. A hungrier dog hunts even better. VII: Decreased business base increases overhead. So does increased business base. VIII: The most unsuccessful four years in the education of a cost-estimator is fifth grade ari

Proust M.


Education is the process of casting false pearls before real swine.

Proverb A Yippie


A furore Normanorum libera nos, O Domine! [From the fury of the norsemen deliver us, O Lord!]

Proverb Ancient Simian


For certain people, after fifty, litigation takes the place of sex.

Proverb Chinese


Doctors and lawyers must go to school for years and years, often with little sleep and with great sacrifice to their first wives.

Proverb Chinese


But the greatest Electrical Pioneer of them all was Thomas Edison, who was a brilliant inventor despite the fact that he had little formal education and lived in New Jersey. Edison's first major invention in 1877, was the phonograph, which could soo

Proverb Recent Chinese


Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a new wearer of clothes.

Pryne Hester


If a fool persists in his folly he shall become wise.

Psalms


A sinking ship gathers no moss.

Publilius


You have to run as fast as you can just to stay where you are. If you want to get anywhere, you'll have to run much faster.

Publius Ovidius Naso


Plumbing is one of the easier of do-it-yourself activities, requiring only a few simple tools and a willingness to stick your arm into a clogged toilet. In fact, you can solve many home plumbing problems, such as annoying faucet drip, merely by tur

Publius Terentius Afer


The coast was clear.

Publius Terentius Afer


The future is a race between education and catastrophe.

Publius Terentius Afer


The chief enemy of creativity is "good" sense

Publius Terentius Afer


A highly intelligent man should take a primitive woman. Imagine if on top of everything else, I had a woman who interfered with my work.

Publius Vergilius Maro


Many hands make light work.

Publius Vergilius Maro


Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.

Publius Vergilius Maro


Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.

Publius Vergilius Maro


To lead people, you must follow behind.

Pudd'nhead Wilson's


Dignity is like a flag. It flaps in a storm.

Pulitzer Joseph


If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

Pusey Nathan


Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine.

Pyrrhus


Diary of a Young Girl LITE(tm)

Python Monty


... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

prayer Medieval


Indeed, the first noble truth of Buddhism, usually translated as `all life is suffering,' is more accurately rendered `life is filled with a sense of pervasive unsatisfactoriness.'

proverb Arab


Any philosophy that can be put "in a nutshell" belongs there.

proverb Arabian


CF&C stole it, fair and square.

proverb Chinese


What a bonanza! An unknown beginner to be directed by Lubitsch, in a script by Wilder and Brackett, and to play with Paramount's two superstars, Gary Cooper and Claudette Colbert, and to be beaten up by both of them!

proverb Chinese


Set the cart before the horse.

proverb Chinese


Money can't buy love, but it improves your bargaining position.

proverb Chinese


I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.

proverb Chinese


"You mean, if you allow the master to be uncivil, to treat you any old way he likes, and to insult your dignity, then he may deem you fit to hear his view of things?" "Quite the contrary. You must defend your integrity, assuming you have integrit

proverb Chinese


My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.

proverb Chinese


The man-hating woman, like the cold woman, is largely imaginary. She is simply a woman who has done her best to snare a man and has failed.

proverb Indian


If you want to know what god thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

proverb Italian


Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow!

proverb Polish


We were so poor we couldn't afford a watchdog. If we heard a noise at night, we'd bark ourselves.

proverb Spanish


The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.

proverb Turkish


Honesty's the best policy.

proverb. Scottish





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Allen Woody

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