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"I understand this is your first dead client," Sabian was saying. The absurdity of the statement made me want to laugh but they don't call me Deadpan Allie and lie.


He that teaches himself has a fool for a master.

Raleigh Sir Walter

Innovation is hard to schedule.

Rand Ayn

Women are nothing but machines for producing children.

Rand Ayn

Tip the world over on its side and everything loose will land in Los Angeles.

Randall Stanley J.

Another day, another dollar.

Rankin Jeannette

You can bring men from other parts of the world who are sane. And you know what happens? At the very moment they cross those mountains... they go mad. Instantaneously and automatically, at the very moment they cross the mountains into California,

Ransford Chicago Reader

Force has no place where there is need of skill.

Ray Bob &

Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.

Ray Kroc

Wait for that wisest of all counselors, Time.

Ray Kroc Founder

There are three reasons for becoming a writer: the first is that you need the money; the second that you have something to say that you think the world should know; the third is that you can't think what to do with the long winter evenings.

Raymond F. J.

Our policy is, when in doubt, do the right thing.

Raymond Aron

Cleanliness becomes more important when godliness is unlikely.

Reagan Ronald

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.

Reagan Ronald

Harp not on that string.

Reagan Ronald

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats.

Reagan Ronald

The pollution's at that awkward stage. Too thick to navigate and too thin to cultivate.

Reagan Ronald

Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.

Reagan Ronald

One big pile is better than two little piles.

Reagan Ronald

Someday we'll look back on this moment and plow into a parked car.

Reagan Ronald

The trouble with the rat-race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

Reagan Ronald

Love the sea? I dote upon it

Reagan Ronald

There is a natural hootchy-kootchy to a goldfish.

Reed Rex

The best you get is an even break.

Reed Rex

Divorce is a game played by lawyers.

Reed Thomas B.

Even the best of friends cannot attend each other's funeral.

Regan Gerald

Ben, why didn't you tell me?

Reich Wilhelm

The eye is a menace to clear sight, the ear is a menace to subtle hearing, the mind is a menace to wisdom, every organ of the senses is a menace to its own capacity. ... Fuss, the god of the Southern Ocean, and Fret, the god of the Northern Ocean, h

Reid Thomas

Unless hours were cups of sack, and minutes capons, and clocks the tongues of bawds, and dials the signs of leaping houses, and the blessed sun himself a fair, hot wench in flame-colored taffeta, I see no reason why thou shouldst be so superfluous to

Remarque Erich Maria

Events are not affected, they develop.

Report The Kidner

Unquestionably, there is progress. The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he formerly got in wages.

Reuss Fred

The mome rath isn't born that could outgrabe me.

Rich Rosen

Small is beautiful.

Richard Little

Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star.


She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.


Zero Mostel: That's it baby! When you got it, flaunt it! Flaunt it!

Richard Bach

Of all men's miseries, the bitterest is this: to know so much and have control over nothing.

Richard Bach

Show business is just like high school, except you get paid.

Richard Bach

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.

Richard Bach

The lunatic, the lover, and the poet, Are of imagination all compact...

Richard Henry Dama

If I cannot bend Heaven, I shall move Hell.

Richler Mordecai

Lassie looked brilliant, in part because the farm family she lived with was made up of idiots. Remember? One of them was always getting pinned under the tractor, and Lassie was always rushing back to the farmhouse to alert the other ones. She'd w

Ringer Robert J.

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.

Rizzo Mayor Frank

For if there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life.

Robbins Tom

Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.

Robbins Tom

Honesty's the best policy.

Robbins Tom

Robbins Tom

It was a female that drove me to drink and I didn't even have the kindness to thank her.

Robbins Tom

What is the robbing of a bank compared to the founding of a bank?

Robert Frost

Advertising is the rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket.

Robert Oppenheimer

Philosophy will clip an angel's wings.

Robert Pante

War hath no fury like a non-combatant.

Robert Preston

Writing is easy; all you do is sit staring at the blank sheet of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead.

Robertson Davies

October. This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks in. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August, and February.

Robertson. D.W.

My dear People. My dear Bagginses and Boffins, and my dear Tooks and Brandybucks, and Grubbs, and Chubbs, and Burrowses, and Hornblowers, and Bolgers, Bracegirdles, Goodbodies, Brockhouses and Proudfoots. Also my good Sackville Bagginses that I w


Maybe ain't ain't so correct, but I notice that lots of folks who ain't using ain't ain't eatin' well.

Rochefou La

People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war, or before an election.

Rochefoucauld La

If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.

Rochefoucauld La

When neither their poverty nor their honor is touched, the majority of men live content.

Rochefoucauld La

"I'm dying," he croaked. "My experiment was a success," the chemist retorted . "You can't really train a beagle," he dogmatized. "That's no beagle, it's a mongrel," she muttered. "The fire is going out," he bellowed. "Bad marksmanship," the h

Rockefeller David

Burnt Sienna. That's the best thing that ever happened to Crayolas.

Rockefeller John D.

Certain passages in several laws have always defied interpretation and the most inexplicable must be a matter of opinion. A judge of the Court of Session of Scotland has sent the editors of this book his candidate which reads, "In the Nuts (unground

Rockwell George Lincoln

Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.

Roger Zelazny

It has long been noticed that juries are pitiless for robbery and full of indulgence for infanticide. A question of interest, my dear Sir! The jury is afraid of being robbed and has passed the age when it could be a victim of infanticide.

Roger Zelazny

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

Roger Zelazny

The trouble is, there is an endless supply of White Men, but there has always been a limited number of Human Beings.

Rogers The Best of Will

Serfs up!

Rogers The Best of Will

God is Dead.

Rogers The Best of Will

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.

Rogers The Best of Will

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Rogers The Best of Will

There is no sin but ignorance.

Rogers The Best of Will

It is your concern when your neighbor's wall is on fire.

Rogers The Best of Will

If I could reach, I'd never leave the house.

Rogers The Best of Will

Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday.

Rogers Will

A priest asked: What is Fate, Master? And the Master answered: It is that which gives a beast of burden its reason for existence. It is that which men in former times had to bear upon their backs. It is that which has caused nations to build bywa

Rogers Will

It's not Camelot, but it's not Cleveland, either.

Rogers Will

The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference between a mermaid and a seal.

Rogers Will

Just because everything is different doesn't mean anything has changed.

Rogers Will

Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried.

Rogers Will

A prediction is worth twenty explanations.

Rogers Will

The Least Successful Equal Pay Advertisement In 1976 the European Economic Community pointed out to the Irish Government that it had not yet implemented the agreed sex equality legislation. The Dublin Government immediately advertised for an equal

Rogers Will

It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.

Rogers Will

You can never do just one thing.

Rogers Will

Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.

Rogers Will

Ain't no right way to do a wrong thing.

Rogers Will

The primary theme of SoupCon is communication. The acronym "LEO" represents the secondary theme: Law Enforcement Officials The overall theme of SoupCon shall be: Avoiding Communication with Law Enforcement Officials

Rogers Will

Never laugh at live dragons.

Rom Prof.

Many a bum show has been saved by the flag.

Rona Vincent J. Fuller

Anything is possible on paper.

Rona Vincent J. Fuller

War is like love, it always finds a way.

Ronald Brady

I recognize terror as the finest emotion and so I will try to terrorize the reader. But if I find that I cannot terrify, I will try to horrify, and if I find that I cannot horrify, I'll go for the gross-out.

Ronald Knox

... why should you waste a single moment of *your* life seeming to be something you don't want to be? Lord, that's so simple. If you hate your job, quit it. If your friends are tedious, go out and find new friends. You are queer, you lucky fool, a

Ronald Reagan

Water, taken in moderation cannot hurt anybody.

Roosevelt Eleanor

Truth never comes into the world but like a bastard, to the ignominy of him that brought her birth.

Roosevelt Eleanor

The human animal differs from the lesser primates in his passion for lists of "Ten Best".

Roosevelt Franklin D.

No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.

Roosevelt Franklin D.

Art is anything you can get away with.

Roosevelt Franklin Delano

No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.

Roosevelt Teddy

If a shameless woman expects to be defiled and then dies of her fierce love because you do not consent, will chastity also be homicide?

Roosevelt Theodore

Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,

Roosevelt Theodore

It is through symbols that man consciously or unconsciously lives, works and has his being.

Rose Billy

For there are moments when one can neither think nor feel. And if one can neither think nor feel, she thought, where is one?

Rossetti Christina

It is only by risking our persons from one hour to another that we live at all. And often enough our faith beforehand in an uncertified result is the only thing that makes the result come true.

Roth D.L.

Diary of a Young Girl LITE(tm)

Rouchefoucauld La

It's very glamorous to raise millions of dollars, until it's time for the venture capitalist to suck your eyeballs out.

Rouchefoucauld La

Must I hold a candle to my shames?

Roy L. Ash

Sic transit gloria mundi. [So passes away the glory of this world.]

Royal Darrell

Rembrandt is not to be compared in the painting of character with our extraordinarily gifted English artist, Mr. Rippingille.

Royko Mike

It is convenient that there be gods, and, as it is convenient, let us believe there are.

Rubinstein Arthur

As flies to wanton boys are we to the gods; they kill us for their sport.

Rudner Rita

To listen to some devout people, one would imagine that God never laughs.


The faster we go, the rounder we get.

Rukeyser Muriel

My own life has been spent chronicling the rise and fall of human systems, and I am convinced that we are terribly vulnerable. ... We should be reluctant to turn back upon the frontier of this epoch. Space is indifferent to what we do; it has no fe

Runyon Damon

The chief enemy of creativity is "good" sense

Rusk Dean

[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Russel Baker

Good salesmen and good repairmen will never go hungry.

Russell Bertrand

The Soviet Union, which has complained recently about alleged anti-Soviet themes in American advertising, lodged an official protest this week against the Ford Motor Company's new campaign: "Hey you stinking, fat Russian, get off my Ford Escort."

Russell Bertrand

A violent man will die a violent death.

Russell Bertrand

Better tried by twelve than carried by six.

Russell Bertrand

Fortune's Guide to Freshman Notetaking: WHEN THE PROFESSOR SAYS: YOU WRITE: Probably the greatest quality of the poetry John Milton

Russell Bertrand

Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.

Russell Baker

We cannot do everything at once, but we can do something at once.

Russell Bertrand

The most difficult thing in the world is to know how to do a thing and to watch someone else doing it wrong, without commenting.

Russell Hoban

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

Ryan Tom K.

It's not easy, being green.

regulations. check your security

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The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
Taylor Elizabeth

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