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Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is merely a good excuse not to play football.

S. Paige

'Naomi, sex at noon taxes.' I moan. Never odd or even. A man, a plan, a canal, Panama. Madam, I'm Adam. Sit on a potato pan, Otis. Sit on Otis.

Sabbath Black

There are no great men, buster. There are only men.

Sade Marquis

Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.

Sagan Carl

Humans are communications junkies. We just can't get enough.

Sagan Carl

I was in accord with the system so long as it permitted me to function effectively.

Saint-Exupery Antoine de

Facts, apart from their relationships, are like labels on empty bottles.

Saint-Exupery Antoine de

We are governed not by armies and police but by ideas.

Saint-Exupery Antoine de

"Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet. As you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney. Do you have a car or a job? Do you ever

Saki Tre

Two wrongs are only the beginning.

Salinger J. D.

I'm not the person your mother warned you about... her imagination isn't that good.

Salvor Hardin

I used to be disgusted, now I find I'm just amused.

Samuel Beckett

Man is the only animal that laughs and weeps; for he is the only animal that is struck with the difference between what things are and what they ought to be.

Samuel Butler

'Scuse me, while I kiss the sky!

Samuel Johnson

It is the nature of extreme self-lovers, as they will set an house on fire, and it were but to roast their eggs.

Samuels Jim

It is equally bad when one speeds on the guest unwilling to go, and when he holds back one who is hastening. Rather one should befriend the guest who is there, but speed him when he wishes.

Samuels Jim

It is a lesson which all history teaches wise men, to put trust in ideas, and not in circumstances.

Sandburg Carl

One of your most ancient writers, a historian named Herodotus, tells of a thief who was to be executed. As he was taken away he made a bargain with the king: in one year he would teach the king's favorite horse to sing hymns. The other prisoners wa

Sandburg Carl

I shot an arrow in to the air, and it stuck.

Sandburg Carl

Water, taken in moderation cannot hurt anybody.

Sandra Gotlieb

Eeyore, the old grey Donkey, stood by the side of the stream, and looked at himself in the water. "Pathetic," he said. "That's what it is. Pathetic." He turned and walked slowly down the stream for twenty yards, splashed across it, and walked s

Santayana George

To know Edina is to reject it.

Santayana George

The road to Hades is easy to travel.

Santayana George

I would have promised those terrorists a trip to Disneyland if it would have gotten the hostages released. I thank God they were satisfied with the missiles and we didn't have to go to that extreme.

Santayana George

The use of money is all the advantage there is to having money.

Sartre Jean Paul

Most people are unable to write because they are unable to think, and they are unable to think because they congenitally lack the equipment to do so, just as they congenitally lack the equipment to fly over the moon.

Sartre Jean-Paul

The greatest productive force is human selfishness.

Sartre Jean-Paul

It is all right to hold a conversation, but you should let go of it now and then.

Satie Erik

Reality is just a convenient measure of complexity.

Sayle Alexie

If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it around. Trouble creates a capacity to handle it. I don't say embrace trouble; that's as bad as treating it as an enemy. But I do say meet it as a friend, for you'll see a lot of it and y

Sayre Wallace

Plots are like girdles. Hidden, they hold your interest; revealed, they're of no interest except to fetishists. Like girdles, they attempt to contain an uncontainable experience.

Schaeberle R.

In the first place, God made idiots; this was for practice; then he made school boards.

Schenk R.E.

The sky is blue so we know where to stop mowing.

Schiller Friedrich

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of.

Schlafly Phyllis

"If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination."


Public use of any portable music system is a virtually guaranteed indicator of sociopathic tendencies.

Schmidt Dr. Harrison H.

A sequel is an admission that you've been reduced to imitating yourself.


A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.


What's a cult? It just means not enough people to make a minority.

Schrodinger Edwim

She cried, and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

Schultz C.

There never was a good war or a bad peace.


The difference between a misfortune and a calamity? If Gladstone fell into the Thames, it would be a misfortune. But if someone dragged him out again, it would be a calamity.


The life which is unexamined is not worth living.

Schulz C.

Human resources are human first, and resources second.

Schulz Charles

I've found my niche. If you're wondering why I'm not there, there was this little hole in the bottom ...

Schwambach Stephen R.

Rome was not built in one day.

Schweitzer A.

Well, here it is, 1983, so it won't be long before you start reading a lot of boring stories about people like Vance Hartke. Hartke is a governor or mayor or something from one of the flatter states, and the reason you'll be reading about him is tha

Schweitzer Albert

I don't think they are going to give a shit about the Republican Committee trying to bug the Democratic Committee's headquarters.

Schweitzer Albert

Good government never depends upon laws, but upon the personal qualities of those who govern. The machinery of government is always subordinate to the will of those who administer that machinery. The most important element of government, therefore,


If you have seen one city slum you have seen them all.

Scott Gene

Armenians and Azerbaijanis in Stepanakert, capital of the Nagorno-Karabakh autonomous region, rioted over much needed spelling reform in the Soviet Union.

Secundus Gaius Plinius

Under any conditions, anywhere, whatever you are doing, there is some ordinance under which you can be booked.

Seeger Pete

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.

Seldon Nick

We have nowhere else to go... this is all we have.

Sendak Maurice

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.


No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.


Getting into trouble is easy.

Seneca Lucius Annaeus

Anger is momentary madness.

Seneca Lucius Annaeus

The clergy successfully preached the doctrines of patience and pusillanimity; the active virtues of society were discouraged; and the last remains of a military spirit were buried in the cloister: a large portion of public and private wealth was cons

Seneca Lucius Annaeus

The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.

Seneca Lucius Annaeus

"I've seen, I SAY, I've seen better heads on a mug of beer"

Serling Rod

... Our second completely true news item was sent to me by Mr. H. Boyce Connell Jr. of Atlanta, Ga., where he is involved in a law firm. One thing I like about the South is, folks there care about tradition. If somebody gets handed a name like "H.

Sevareid Eric

The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Sevig Mme De

As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination. When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular.

Shake William

Let us never negotiate out of fear, but let us never fear to negotiate.

Shake William

The surest protection against temptation is cowardice.

Shake William

When you're in command, command.

Shake William

The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech.

Shake William

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. Whatever I can pry up is not nailed down.

Shake William

"I am not sure what this is, but an `F' would only dignify it."

Shake William

There are no manifestos like cannon and musketry.

Shake William

My father was a saint, I'm not.

Shake William

If reporters don't know that truth is plural, they ought to be lawyers.

Shake William

A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election.

Shake William

It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.

Shakes William

There is a road to freedom. Its milestones are Obedience, Endeavor, Honesty, Order, Cleanliness, Sobriety, Truthfulness, Sacrifice, and love of the Fatherland.

Shakes William

I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly dreaming I am a man.

Shakesp William

Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?

Shakesp William

For some reason a glaze passes over people's faces when you say "Canada". Maybe we should invade South Dakota or something.

Shakesp William

One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say.

Shakespea Wm.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.


Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally.

Shakespear William

... [concerning quotation marks] even if we *___did* quote anybody in this business, it probably would be gibberish.

Shakespear William

Whenever anyone says, "theoretically," they really mean, "not really."

Shakespear William

God is Dead.

Shakespear William

When you have an efficient government, you have a dictatorship.

Shakespear William

Don't get mad, get even.


Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.


Do you realize the responsibility I carry? I'm the only person standing between Nixon and the White House.


Fortune's Guide to Freshman Notetaking: WHEN THE PROFESSOR SAYS: YOU WRITE: Probably the greatest quality of the poetry John Milton


"Well," Brahma said, "even after ten thousand explanations, a fool is no wiser, but an intelligent man requires only two thousand five hundred."


There are a lot of lies going around.... and half of them are true.


Ten years of rejection slips is nature's way of telling you to stop writing.

Shakespeare William

My tears stuck in their little ducts, refusing to be jerked.

Shakespeare Wm.

We all live under the same sky, but we don't all have the same horizon.

Shakespeare Wm.

"I understand this is your first dead client," Sabian was saying. The absurdity of the statement made me want to laugh but they don't call me Deadpan Allie and lie.


We Americans, we're a simple people... but piss us off, and we'll bomb your cities.


Think lucky. If you fall in a pond, check your pockets for fish.


The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.


If atheism is to be used to express the state of mind in which God is identified with the unknowable, and theology is pronounced to be a collection of meaningless words about unintelligible chimeras, then I have no doubt, and I think few people doubt


Goose pimples rose all over me, my hair stood on end, my eyes filled with tears of love and gratitude for this greatest of all conquerers of human misery and shame, and my breath came in little gasps. If I had not known that the Leader would have sc


Catholicism has changed tremendously in the recent years. Now when Communion is served there is also a salad bar.


We are all so much together and yet we are all dying of loneliness.


The trouble with superheros is what to do between phone booths.


I treasure this strange combination found in very few persons: a fierce desire for life as well as a lucid perception of the ultimate futility of the quest.


October. This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks in. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August, and February.


IV. The time required for an object to fall twenty stories is greater than or equal to the time it takes for whoever knocked it off the ledge to spiral down twenty flights to attempt to capture it unbroken. Such an object is inevitably price


A priest asked: What is Fate, Master? And the Master answered: It is that which gives a beast of burden its reason for existence. It is that which men in former times had to bear upon their backs. It is that which has caused nations to build bywa


A little bit of rape is good for a man's soul.


Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.

Shakespeare William

Let him choose out of my files, his projects to accomplish.

Shakespeare William

The great secret in life ... [is] not to open your letters for a fortnight. At the expiration of that period you will find that nearly all of them have answered themselves.

Shakespeare William

Si Dieu n'existait pas, il faudrait l'inventer. [If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.]

Shakespeare William

Governor Tarkin. I should have expected to find you holding Vader's leash. I thought I recognized your foul stench when I was brought on board.

Shakespeare William

The conservation movement is a breeding ground of Communists and other subversives. We intend to clean them out, even if it means rounding up every bird watcher in the country.

Shakespeare William

Fame lost its appeal for me when I went into a public restroom and an autograph seeker handed me a pen and paper under the stall door.

Shakespeare William

Andrea: Unhappy the land that has no heroes. Galileo: No, unhappy the land that _____needs heroes.

Shakespeare William

Man has made his bedlam; let him lie in it.

Shakespeare William

When I was in school, I cheated on my metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.

Shakespeare William

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.

Shakespeare William

It has been said [by Anatole France], "it is not by amusing oneself that one learns," and, in reply: "it is *____only* by amusing oneself that one can learn."

Shakespeare William

Solipsists of the World... you are already united.

Shakespeare William

Sanity is the trademark of a weak mind.

Shakespeare William

I do not know where to find in any literature, whether ancient or modern, any adequate account of that nature with which I am acquainted. Mythology comes nearest to it of any.

Shakespeare William

Just because I turn down a contract on a guy doesn't mean he isn't going to get hit.

Shakespeare William

France is a country where the money falls apart and you can't tear the toilet paper.

Shakespeare William

The best laid plans of mice and men are usually about equal.

Shakespeare Wm.

He draweth out the thread of his verbosity finer than the staple of his argument.

Shan Wayne

God made everything out of nothing, but the nothingness shows through.

Shannon Wayne

You can fool all the people all of the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough.

Shaw G. B.

You have to run as fast as you can just to stay where you are. If you want to get anywhere, you'll have to run much faster.

Shaw G. B.

Freedom is what you do with what's been done to you.

Shaw G.B.

"I gained nothing at all from Supreme Enlightenment, and for that very reason it is called Supreme Enlightenment."

Shaw G.B.

Never have so many understood so little about so much.

Shaw G.B.

The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work.

Shaw G.B.

Feminists say 60 percent of the country's wealth is in the hands of women. They're letting men hold the other 40 percent because their handbags are full.

Shaw G.B.

Political speeches are like steer horns. A point here, a point there, and a lot of bull inbetween.

Shaw G.B.

All men know the utility of useful things; but they do not know the utility of futility.

Shaw G.B.

You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner.

Shaw G.B.

The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The terror of their tyranny, however, is alleviated by their lack of consistency.

Shaw George Bernard

IF I HAD A MINE SHAFT, I don't think I would just abandon it. There's got to be a better way.

Shaw George Bernard

Your chances of getting hit by lightning go up if you stand under a tree, shake your fist at the sky, and say, "Storms suck!"

Shaw George Bernard

Can you buy friendship? You not only can, you must. It's the only way to obtain friends. Everything worthwhile has a price.

Shaw George Bernard

Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art.

Shaw George Bernard

The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself.

Shaw George Bernard

The Lord prefers common-looking people. That is the reason that He makes so many of them.

Shaw George Bernard

One would like to stroke and caress human beings, but one dares not do so, because they bite.

Shaw George Bernard

A writer is congenitally unable to tell the truth and that is why we call what he writes fiction.

Shaw George Bernard

It's is not, it isn't ain't, and it's it's, not its, if you mean it is. If you don't, it's its. Then too, it's hers. It isn't her's. It isn't our's either. It's ours, and likewise yours and theirs.

Shaw George Bernard

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

Shaw George Bernard

"World conquerors sometimes become fools, but fools never become world conquerors."

Shaw G. B.

If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.

Shaw George Bernard

We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

Shaw Pygmali

There is a secret person undamaged within every individual.

Shawn Wally

Those who are mentally and emotionally healthy are those who have learned when to say yes, when to say no and when to say whoopee.

Shay R.E.

The ripest fruit falls first.

Shelton Richard

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.

Shepard Paul

Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.


The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Sherlock Holmes

Let us endeavor so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

Sherlock Holmes

He that is giddy thinks the world turns round.

Sherlock Holmes

It seems appropriate to me that Mapplethorpe's perverse images should be situated so close to Congress, which perpetuates a number of unnatural acts upon the body politic every day, without benefit of artificial lubrication or foreplay.

Shields Brooke

The primary theme of SoupCon is communication. The acronym "LEO" represents the secondary theme: Law Enforcement Officials The overall theme of SoupCon shall be: Avoiding Communication with Law Enforcement Officials


Non-Determinism is not meant to be reasonable.

Shirley Hazzard

An older student came to Otis and said, "I have been to see a great number of teachers and I have given up a great number of pleasures. I have fasted, been celibate and stayed awake nights seeking enlightenment. I have given up everything I was aske

Shirley Jackson

Higgins: Doolittle, you're either an honest man or a rogue. Doolittle: A little of both, Guv'nor. Like the rest of us, a little of both.

Shoaff Edgar A.

With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.

Shoales Ian

You will remember, Watson, how the dreadful business of the Abernetty family was first brought to my notice by the depth which the parsley had sunk into the butter upon a hot day.


Like ya know? Rock 'N Roll is an esoteric language that unlocks the creativity chambers in people's brains, and like totally activates their essential hipness, which of course is like totally necessary for saving the earth, like because the first th

Sidney Greenstreet

Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.

Sidney Paternoster

The better the state is established, the fainter is humanity. To make the individual uncomfortable, that is my task.

Sidney Smith

The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.

Siegel Corky

All of the true things I am about to tell you are shameless lies.


If you don't count some of Jehovah's injunctions, there are no humorists in the Bible.

Silve James Cabell

It is common sense to take a method and try it. If it fails, admit it frankly and try another. But above all, try something.

Simon Paul

In Hollywood, all marriages are happy. It's trying to live together afterwards that causes the problems.

Simpson Bart

If a man loses his reverence for any part of life, he will lose his reverence for all of life.


The Worst Jury A murder trial at Manitoba in February 1978 was well advanced, when one juror revealed that he was completely deaf and did not have the remotest clue what was happening. The judge, Mr. Justice Solomon, asked him if he had heard any


That's where the money was.

Sinclair John

Shall we make a new rule of life from tonight: always to try to be a little kinder than is necessary?

Sinclair Lewis

Playing an unamplified electric guitar is like strumming on a picnic table.

Skinner B.F.

"Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it."

Sky Patrick

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Skywalker Luke

If you lose a son you can always get another, but there's only one Maltese Falcon.

Skywalker Luke

We should have a great many fewer disputes in the world if only words were taken for what they are, the signs of our ideas only, and not for things themselves.

Skywalker Luke

In charity there is no excess.

Skywalker Luke

Two heads are better than one.

Sloan John

Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd.

Smith Alexander

Class, that's the only thing that counts in life. Class. Without class and style, a man's a bum; he might as well be dead.

Smith Alvy Ray

The genius of our ruling class is that it has kept a majority of the people from ever questioning the inequity of a system where most people drudge along paying heavy taxes for which they get nothing in return.

Smith Evelyn E.

I've got all the money I'll ever need if I die by 4 o'clock.

Smith H. Allen

I knew one thing: as soon as anyone said you didn't need a gun, you'd better take one along that worked.

Smith J. Winter

One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar.

Smith Jonathan Michael

"I'm in Pittsburgh. Why am I here?"

Smith Malcolm

Every cloud engenders not a storm.

Smith Mike

Corrupt, stupid grasping functionaries will make at least as big a muddle of socialism as stupid, selfish and acquisitive employers can make of capitalism.

Smith Nancy Banks

To teach is to learn twice.

Smith Red

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.

Smith Sydney

Smith Allen

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

Smith Allen

Sometimes even to live is an act of courage.

Smith v. Moran

Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts.

Smith v. Moran

I sometimes think that God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.

Smith v. Moran

An expert is a person who avoids the small errors as he sweeps on to the grand fallacy.

Smithsonian Maga

A critic is a bundle of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste.

Smolla Rodney

Political history is far too criminal a subject to be a fit thing to teach children.

Smollet Tobias

Blessed is he who has reached the point of no return and knows it, for he shall enjoy living.

Sneyd Doug

If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him.


I am a friend of the working man, and I would rather be his friend than be one.


You are absolute plate-glass. I see to the very back of your mind.

Snow C. P.

... relaxed in the manner of a man who has no need to put up a front of any kind.

Snow Carrie

All I kin say is when you finds yo'self wanderin' in a peach orchard, ya don't go lookin' for rutabagas.

Soaper Senator

Interesting poll results reported in today's New York Post: people on the street in midtown Manhattan were asked whether they approved of the US invasion of Grenada. Fifty-three percent said yes; 39 percent said no; and 8 percent said "Gimme a quart

Soc Michael Levin

Your friends will know you better in the first minute you meet than your acquaintances will know you in a thousand years.


A casual stroll through a lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything.


Man proposes, God disposes.


Persistence in one opinion has never been considered a merit in political leaders.

Solo Han

Let sleeping dogs lie.

Solo Han

Just weigh your own hurt against the hurt of all the others, and then do what's best.

Solo Han

It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our offense consists in doubting it.

Solo Han

If you just try long enough and hard enough, you can always manage to boot yourself in the posterior.

Solo Han

America may be unique in being a country which has leapt from barbarism to decadence without touching civilization.

Solo Han

You can tell the ideals of a nation by its advertisements.

Solo Han

I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones.

Solo Han

Some scholars are like donkeys, they merely carry a lot of books.

Solzhenitsyn Aleksandr I.

The American system of ours, call it Americanism, call it Capitalism, call it what you like, gives each and every one of us a great opportunity if we only seize it with both hands and make the most of it.

Solzhenitsyn Aleksandr I.

Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending t

Somoza Anastasio

Virtue would go far if vanity did not keep it company.

Sondheim Stephen

Who does not trust enough will not be trusted.

Sontag Susan

Never explain. Your friends do not need it and your enemies will never believe you anyway.

Sontag Susan

Everyone wants results, but no one is willing to do what it takes to get them.

Sontag Susan

Many a writer seems to think he is never profound except when he can't understand his own meaning.


If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.


Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with.

Soul Messiah

Anything anybody can say about America is true.

Soul Messiah

Then, gently touching my face, she hesitated for a moment as her incredible eyes poured forth into mine love, joy, pain, tragedy, acceptance, and peace. "'Bye for now," she said warmly.

Southern Terry

Delay not, Caesar. Read it instantly.

Southern Terry

Woman is generally so bad that the difference between a good and a bad woman scarcely exists.

Southern Terry

The salary of the chief executive of the large corporation is not a market award for achievement. It is frequently in the nature of a warm personal gesture by the individual to himself.


The abuse of greatness is when it disjoins remorse from power.

Speer Albert

War is delightful to those who have had no experience of it.

Spider Robinson

It's amazing how nice people are to you when they know you're going away.


Mum's the word.

Spr Robert D.

No excellent soul is exempt from a mixture of madness.

Spurgeon Charles

Diplomacy is about surviving until the next century. Politics is about surviving until Friday afternoon.

Stalin Joseph

Arguments are extremely vulgar, for everyone in good society holds exactly the same opinion.

Stalin Joseph

Violence stinks, no matter which end of it you're on. But now and then there's nothing left to do but hit the other person over the head with a frying pan. Sometimes people are just begging for that frypan, and if we weaken for a moment and honor t

Stalin Joseph

The major advances in civilization are processes that all but wreck the societies in which they occur.

Stalin Joseph

I'll give you my opinion of the human race in a nutshell ... their heart's in the right place, but their head is a thoroughly inefficient organ.

Stallman R.

It follows that any commander in chief who undertakes to carry out a plan which he considers defective is at fault; he must put forth his reasons, insist of the plan being changed, and finally tender his resignation rather than be the instrument of h

Stamp Sir Josiah

Like, if I'm not for me, then fer shure, like who will be? And if, y'know, if I'm not like fer anyone else, then hey, I mean, what am I? And if not now, like I dunno, maybe like when? And if not Who, then I dunno, maybe like the Rolling Stones?


To defend the Saigon regime is not worth one more human life.

Stanislaw J. Lem

He liked fishing a little too much, and he believed that work was something a man did when he had to. He had always been able to get along well enough without it, especially for the last couple of years.

Stanislaw J. Lem

He who laughs has not yet heard the bad news.

Stanislaw Lem

There are no answers, only cross-references.

Stanislaw Lem

What we wish, that we readily believe.

Stanley Kelley

It is generally agreed that "Hello" is an appropriate greeting because if you entered a room and said "Goodbye," it could confuse a lot of people.

Starfighter The Last

... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

Stasheff Christopher

Prizes are for children.

Steinbeck John

of the time.

Steinem Gloria

Hard reality has a way of cramping your style.

Stekel Wilhelm

Always the dullness of the fool is the whetstone of the wits.


Suicide is the sincerest form of self-criticism.

Stephen Leslie

Fill what's empty, empty what's full, scratch where it itches.

Stephen Coonts

"The chain which can be yanked is not the eternal chain."

Stephen Pile

Termiter's argument that God is His own grandmother generated a surprising amount of controversy among Church leaders, who on the one hand considered the argument unsupported by scripture but on the other hand were unwilling to risk offending God's g

Stephen Pile

All diplomacy is a continuation of war by other means.

Stern Jerome

Diplomacy is the art of letting the other party have things your way.

Stevenson Adlai

There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.

Stevenson Adlai

Nothing in life is so exhilarating as to be shot at without result.

Stevenson Adlai

Either I'm dead or my watch has stopped.

Stevenson Adlai

Don't go to bed with no price on your head.

Stevenson Adlai

I acted to show my love for Jodie Foster.

Stevenson Adlai

Art is anything you can get away with.

Stevenson Robert Louis

When I have one foot in the grave I will tell the truth about women. I shall tell it, jump into my coffin, pull the lid over me, and say, "Do what you like now."

Stevenson Robert Louis

What you want, what you're hanging around in the world waiting for, is for something to occur to you.

Stevenson Robert Louis

Better the prince of some inferior court, Than second, or less, in beatific light.

Stevenson Robert Louis

The first sign of corruption in a society that is still alive is that the end justifies the means.

Stimson Henry

Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.

Stinnett Caskie

Language is a virus from another planet.

Stolberg Benjamin

Never face facts; if you do you'll never get up in the morning.

Stone I.F.

Divorce is a game played by lawyers.

Stone Judge Harold T.

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

Stone Judge Harold T.

The aim of a joke is not to degrade the human being but to remind him that he is already degraded.

Stone Robert

We can embody the truth, but we cannot know it.

Stone W. Clement

I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.

Stoppard Tom

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

Stoppard Tom

Roumanian-Yiddish cooking has killed more Jews than Hitler.

Storm Johnny

The streets were dark with something more than night.

Strachey Lionel

Nothing is more admirable than the fortitude with which millionaires tolerate the disadvantages of their wealth.

Strange de Jim

We tried to close Ohio's borders and ran into a Constitutional problem. There's a provision in the Constitution that says you can't close your borders to interstate commerce, and garbage is a form of interstate commerce.

Strangers Lovers and Other

Many mental processes admit of being roughly measured. For instance, the degree to which people are bored, by counting the number of their fidgets. I not infrequently tried this method at the meetings of the Royal Geographical Society, for even ther


Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

Sturgeon Theodore

We know all about the habits of the ant, we know all about the habits of the bee, but we know nothing at all about the habits of the oyster. It seems almost certain that we have been choosing the wrong time for studying the oyster.

Summer Graham

Luck can't last a lifetime, unless you die young.

Sunday Billy

There is no proverb that is not true.


Too much is just enough.

Surtees R.S.

Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.

Susan Brownmiller

I have already given two cousins to the war and I stand ready to sacrifice my wife's brother.

Swan Paradi

Leave no stone unturned.

Swayze John Cameron

Work is the crab grass in the lawn of life.

Swift Jonathan

All phone calls are obscene.

Swift Jonathan

Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper.

Swift Jonathan

"My country, right or wrong" is a thing that no patriot would think of saying, except in a desperate case. It is like saying "My mother, drunk or sober."

Sylvan Kayvan

The horizon of many people is a circle with a radius of zero. They call this their point of view.

Syrus Publilius

"We're not talking about the same thing," he said. "For you the world is weird because if you're not bored with it you're at odds with it. For me the world is weird because it is stupendous, awesome, mysterious, unfathomable; my interest has been to

Syrus Publilius

Capitalism is the extraordinary belief that the nastiest of men, for the nastiest of reasons, will somehow work for the benefit of us all.

Syrus Publilius

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

Syrus Publilius

If we see the light at the end of the tunnel, it's the light of an oncoming train.

Syrus Publilius

This is an especially good time for you vacationers who plan to fly, because the Reagan administration, as part of the same policy under which it recently sold Yellowstone National Park to Wayne Newton, has "deregulated" the airline industry. What t

Syrus Publilius

Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

Syrus Publilius

Democrats buy most of the books that have been banned somewhere. Republicans form censorship committees and read them as a group. Republicans consume three-fourths of the rutabaga produced in the USA. The remainder is thrown out. Republicans usu

Syrus Publilius

The great nations have always acted like gangsters and the small nations like prostitutes.

Syrus Publilius

Calvin Coolidge was the greatest man who ever came out of Plymouth Corner, Vermont.

Syrus Publilius

The angry man always thinks he can do more than he can.

Syrus Publilius

I cannot and will not cut my conscience to fit this year's fashions.

Syrus Publius

VII. Certain bodies can pass through solid walls painted to resemble tunnel entrances; others cannot. This trompe l'oeil inconsistency has baffled generations, but at least it is known that whoever paints an entrance on a wall's surface to

Szasz Thomas

America, how can I write a holy litany in your silly mood?

Szasz Thomas

To every Ph.D. there is an equal and opposite Ph.D.

saying Folk

The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence that it is not utterly absurd; indeed, in view of the silliness of the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more often likely to be foolish than sensible.

saying Yiddish

San Francisco isn't what it used to be, and it never was.

sees it constantly

Random Quote

A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a "Yes" merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.
Gandhi Mahatma

deep thoughts of brillyant genius of human history
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