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It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.

S. Paige


The universe is made of stories, not of atoms.

Sabbath Black


What soon grows old? Gratitude.

Sade Marquis


The streets were dark with something more than night.

Sagan Carl


The most common given name in the world is Mohammad; the most common family name in the world is Chang. Can you imagine the enormous number of people in the world named Mohammad Chang?

Sagan Carl


Comparing information and knowledge is like asking whether the fatness of a pig is more or less green than the designated hitter rule."

Saint-Exupery Antoine de


Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Saint-Exupery Antoine de


Patch griefs with proverbs.

Saint-Exupery Antoine de


The only happiness lies in reason; all the rest of the world is dismal. The highest reason, however, I see in the work of the artist, and he may experience it as such. Happiness lies in the swiftness of feeling and thinking: all the rest of the worl

Saki Tre


Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem more afraid of life than death.

Salinger J. D.


I value kindness to human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don't respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper, and old men

Salvor Hardin


Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a new wearer of clothes.

Samuel Beckett


If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death. If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law? There is always an official executioner. If

Samuel Butler


All I kin say is when you finds yo'self wanderin' in a peach orchard, ya don't go lookin' for rutabagas.

Samuel Johnson


"Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him."

Samuels Jim


He that composes himself is wiser than he that composes a book.

Samuels Jim


God instructs the heart, not by ideas, but by pains and contradictions.

Sandburg Carl


No two persons ever read the same book.

Sandburg Carl


Nullum magnum ingenium sine mixtura dementiae fuit. [There is no great genius without some touch of madness.]

Sandburg Carl


Never tell people how to do things. Tell them WHAT to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.

Sandra Gotlieb


Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work.

Santayana George


This was the most unkindest cut of all.

Santayana George


"Do you think there's a God?" "Well, ____SOMEbody's out to get me!"

Santayana George


When in doubt, use brute force.

Santayana George


He has not acquired a fortune; the fortune has acquired him.

Sartre Jean Paul


There's no such thing as a free lunch.

Sartre Jean-Paul


No house should ever be on any hill or on anything. It should be of the hill, belonging to it.

Sartre Jean-Paul


'Scuse me, while I kiss the sky!

Satie Erik


Well, we'll really have a party, but we've gotta post a guard outside.

Sayle Alexie


Would it help if I got out and pushed?

Sayre Wallace


There's no justice in this world.

Schaeberle R.


Since everything in life is but an experience perfect in being what it is, having nothing to do with good or bad, acceptance or rejection, one may well burst out in laughter.

Schenk R.E.


"Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing."

Schiller Friedrich


The possession of a book becomes a substitute for reading it.

Schlafly Phyllis


The seven deadly sins ... Food, clothing, firing, rent, taxes, respectability and children. Nothing can lift those seven milestones from man's neck but money; and the spirit cannot soar until the milestones are lifted.

Schmidt


Pauca sed matura. [Few but excellent.]

Schmidt Dr. Harrison H.


There is an old time toast which is golden for its beauty. "When you ascend the hill of prosperity may you not meet a friend."

Schopenhauer


With her body, woman is more sincere than man; but with her mind she lies. And when she lies, she does not believe herself.

Schopenhauer


And ever has it been known that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

Schrodinger Edwim


When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.

Schultz C.


Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for even the greatest fool may ask more the the wisest man can answer.

Schulz


We were so poor we couldn't afford a watchdog. If we heard a noise at night, we'd bark ourselves.

Schulz


The Least Successful Equal Pay Advertisement In 1976 the European Economic Community pointed out to the Irish Government that it had not yet implemented the agreed sex equality legislation. The Dublin Government immediately advertised for an equal

Schulz C.


Either I'm dead or my watch has stopped.

Schulz Charles


A witty saying proves nothing.

Schwambach Stephen R.


Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.

Schweitzer A.


[District Attorneys] learn in District Attorney School that there are two sure-fire ways to get a lot of favorable publicity: (1) Go down and raid all the lockers in the local high school and confiscate 53 marijuana cigarettes and put them in a

Schweitzer Albert


Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.

Schweitzer Albert


What we need in this country, instead of Daylight Savings Time, which nobody really understands anyway, is a new concept called Weekday Morning Time, whereby at 7 a.m. every weekday we go into a space-launch-style "hold" for two to three hours, durin

Scott


The road to Hades is easy to travel.

Scott Gene


No is no negative in a woman's mouth.

Secundus Gaius Plinius


"I only touch base with reality on an as-needed basis!"

Seeger Pete


October. This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks in. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August, and February.

Seldon Nick


Odets, where is thy sting?

Sendak Maurice


God made everything out of nothing, but the nothingness shows through.

Seneca


A woman takes off her claim to respect along with her garments.

Seneca


Money doesn't talk, it swears.

Seneca Lucius Annaeus


Any philosophy that can be put "in a nutshell" belongs there.

Seneca Lucius Annaeus


"Hi, I'm Preston A. Mantis, president of Consumers Retail Law Outlet. As you can see by my suit and the fact that I have all these books of equal height on the shelves behind me, I am a trained legal attorney. Do you have a car or a job? Do you ever

Seneca Lucius Annaeus


The term "fire" brings up visions of violence and mayhem and the ugly scene of shooting employees who make mistakes. We will now refer to this process as "deleting" an employee (much as a file is deleted from a disk). The employee is simply there o

Seneca Lucius Annaeus


Trifles make perfection, and perfection is no trifle.

Serling Rod


Talkers are no good doers.

Sevareid Eric


Competitive fury is not always anger. It is the true missionary's courage and zeal in facing the possibility that one's best may not be enough.

Sevig Mme De


VI: A hungry dog hunts best. A hungrier dog hunts even better. VII: Decreased business base increases overhead. So does increased business base. VIII: The most unsuccessful four years in the education of a cost-estimator is fifth grade ari

Shake William


Living in New York City gives people real incentives to want things that nobody else wants.

Shake William


"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away".

Shake William


Seeing that death, a necessary end, Will come when it will come.

Shake William


If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

Shake William


The final delusion is the belief that one has lost all delusions.

Shake William


"She said, `I know you ... you cannot sing'. I said, `That's nothing, you should hear me play piano.'"

Shake William


A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.

Shake William


General notions are generally wrong.

Shake William


The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice.

Shake William


It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our offense consists in doubting it.

Shake William


[He] took me into his library and showed me his books, of which he had a complete set.

Shakes William


You don't have to think too hard when you talk to teachers.

Shakes William


The average Ph.D thesis is nothing but the transference of bones from one graveyard to another.

Shakesp William


We were young and our happiness dazzled us with its strength. But there was also a terrible betrayal that lay within me like a Merle Haggard song at a French restaurant. [...] I could not tell the girl about the woman of the tollway, of her milk w

Shakesp William


Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.

Shakesp William


When one burns one's bridges, what a very nice fire it makes.

Shakespea Wm.


"Not Hercules could have knock'd out his brains, for he had none."

Shakespear


I have a very strange feeling about this...

Shakespear William


Having the fewest wants, I am nearest to the gods.

Shakespear William


It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish.

Shakespear William


There are three infallible ways of pleasing an author, and the three form a rising scale of compliment: 1, to tell him you have read one of his books; 2, to tell him you have read all of his books; 3, to ask him to let you read the manuscript of his

Shakespear William


Men freely believe that what they wish to desire.

Shakespear William


"If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination."

Shakespeare


A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.

Shakespeare


The root of all superstition is that men observe when a thing hits, but not when it misses.

Shakespeare


Just close your eyes, tap your heels together three times, and think to yourself, `There's no place like home.'

Shakespeare


In every hierarchy the cream rises until it sours.

Shakespeare


A little bit of rape is good for a man's soul.

Shakespeare


Fortune Documents the Great Legal Decisions: We think that we may take judicial notice of the fact that the term "bitch" may imply some feeling of endearment when applied to a female of the canine species but that it is seldom, if ever, so used whe

Shakespeare William


Very few people do anything creative after the age of thirty-five. The reason is that very few people do anything creative before the age of thirty-five.

Shakespeare Wm.


There are many of us in this old world of ours who hold that things break about even for all of us. I have observed, for example, that we all get about the same amount of ice. The rich get it in the summer and the poor get it in the winter.

Shakespeare Wm.


Writing is turning one's worst moments into money.

Shakespeare


The cable TV sex channels don't expand our horizons, don't make us better people, and don't come in clearly enough.

Shakespeare


"I understand this is your first dead client," Sabian was saying. The absurdity of the statement made me want to laugh but they don't call me Deadpan Allie and lie.

Shakespeare


Call on God, but row away from the rocks.

Shakespeare


Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.

Shakespeare


My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income.

Shakespeare


Naked children have never played in _o_u_r fountains, and I.M. Pei will never be happy on Route 66.

Shakespeare


Once, I read that a man be never stronger than when he truly realizes how weak he is.

Shakespeare


If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.

Shakespeare


If I had done everything I'm credited with, I'd be speaking to you from a laboratory jar at Harvard.

Shakespeare


There is nothing so easy but that it becomes difficult when you do it reluctantly.

Shakespeare


If God is One, what is bad?

Shakespeare


The farther you go, the less you know.

Shakespeare


If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive!

Shakespeare


Several years ago, some smart businessmen had an idea: Why not build a big store where a do-it-yourselfer could get everything he needed at reasonable prices? Then they decided, nah, the hell with that, let's build a home center. And before long ho

Shakespeare William


Burnt Sienna. That's the best thing that ever happened to Crayolas.

Shakespeare William


Diary of a Young Girl LITE(tm)

Shakespeare William


Execute every act of thy life as though it were thy last.

Shakespeare William


Yevtushenko has... an ego that can crack crystal at a distance of twenty feet.

Shakespeare William


Life is the childhood of our immortality.

Shakespeare William


were found to be wearing neckwear that was tighter than their neck circumference. The visual discrimination of the 22 subjects was evaluated using a critical flicker frequency (CFF) test. Results of the CFF test indicated that tight neckwear signifi

Shakespeare William


... but as records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witch

Shakespeare William


If you want divine justice, die.

Shakespeare William


I can't understand why a person will take a year or two to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.

Shakespeare William


Sometimes a man who deserves to be looked down upon because he is a fool is despised only because he is a lawyer.

Shakespeare William


Optimism is the content of small men in high places.

Shakespeare William


"Well, it's garish, ugly, and derelicts have used it for a toilet. The rides are dilapidated to the point of being lethal, and could easily maim or kill innocent little children." "Oh, so you don't like it?" "Don't like it? I'm CRAZY for it."

Shakespeare William


It is the quality rather than the quantity that matters.

Shakespeare William


Acting is not very hard. The most important things are to be able to laugh and cry. If I have to cry, I think of my sex life. And if I have to laugh, well, I think of my sex life.

Shakespeare William


If I had a plantation in Georgia and a home in Hell, I'd sell the plantation and go home.

Shakespeare William


Perhaps the remembrance of these things will prove a source of future pleasure.

Shakespeare William


The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail; if it were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.

Shakespeare Wm.


Arrakis teaches the attitude of the knife - chopping off what's incomplete and saying: "Now it's complete because it's ended here."

Shan Wayne


There is more to life than increasing its speed.

Shannon Wayne


I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.

Shaw G. B.


Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.

Shaw G. B.


Take what you can use and let the rest go by.

Shaw G.B.


We are what we pretend to be.

Shaw G.B.


For every bloke who makes his mark, there's half a dozen waiting to rub it out.

Shaw G.B.


Art is Nature speeded up and God slowed down.

Shaw G.B.


I'd just as soon kiss a Wookie.

Shaw G.B.


This is the sort of English up with which I will not put.

Shaw G.B.


I BET WHAT HAPPENED was they discovered fire and invented the wheel on the same day. Then that night, they burned the wheel.

Shaw G.B.


A violent man will die a violent death.

Shaw G.B.


What you don't know won't help you much either.

Shaw George Bernard


I accept chaos. I am not sure whether it accepts me. I know some people are terrified of the bomb. But then some people are terrified to be seen carrying a modern screen magazine. Experience teaches us that silence terrifies people the most.

Shaw George Bernard


Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river. Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the twigs and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life, and resisting the current what each had

Shaw George Bernard


... a thing called Ethics, whose nature was confusing but if you had it you were a High-Class Realtor and if you hadn't you were a shyster, a piker and a fly-by-night. These virtues awakened Confidence and enabled you to handle Bigger Propositions.

Shaw George Bernard


The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Shaw George Bernard


The Soviet Union, which has complained recently about alleged anti-Soviet themes in American advertising, lodged an official protest this week against the Ford Motor Company's new campaign: "Hey you stinking, fat Russian, get off my Ford Escort."

Shaw George Bernard


A man gazing at the stars is proverbially at the mercy of the puddles in the road.

Shaw George Bernard


My tears stuck in their little ducts, refusing to be jerked.

Shaw George Bernard


It is imperative when flying coach that you restrain any tendency toward the vividly imaginative. For although it may momentarily appear to be the case, it is not at all likely that the cabin is entirely inhabited by crying babies smoking inexpensiv

Shaw George Bernard


One of my favorite jokes, a telling commentary on Jewish mothers' capacity to lay on guilt, involves the mother who gave her son two neckties on Chanuka. The boy hurried into his bedroom, ripped off the tie he was wearing, put on one of the ties his

Shaw George Bernard


There are two kinds of pedestrians... the quick and the dead.

Shaw George Bernard


The Worst Musical Trio There are few bad musicians who have a chance to give a recital at a famous concert hall while still learning the rudiments of their instrument. This happened about thirty years ago to the son of a Rumanian gentleman who was

Shaw G. B.


[The French Riviera is] a sunny place for shady people.

Shaw George Bernard


Whatever occurs from love is always beyond good and evil.

Shaw Pygmali


A committee is a group that keeps the minutes and loses hours.

Shawn Wally


The mosquito is the state bird of New Jersey.

Shay R.E.


We're living in a golden age. All you need is gold.

Shelton Richard


Hotels are tired of getting ripped off. I checked into a hotel and they had towels from my house.

Shepard Paul


[Maturity consists in the discovery that] there comes a critical moment where everything is reversed, after which the point becomes to understand more and more that there is something which cannot be understood.

Sheridan


Do not despair of life. You have no doubt force enough to overcome your obstacles. Think of the fox prowling through wood and field in a winter night for something to satisfy his hunger. Notwithstanding cold and hounds and traps, his race survives

Sherlock Holmes


In "King Henry VI, Part II," Shakespeare has Dick Butcher suggest to his fellow anti-establishment rabble-rousers, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." That action may be extreme but a similar sentiment was expressed by Thomas K. Co

Sherlock Holmes


In dwelling, be close to the land. In meditation, delve deep into the heart. In dealing with others, be gentle and kind. In speech, be true. In work, be competent. In action, be careful of your timing.

Sherlock Holmes


"We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!"

Shields Brooke


It is not doing the thing we like to do, but liking the thing we have to do, that makes life blessed.

Shirley


All of the true things I am about to tell you are shameless lies.

Shirley Hazzard


What fools these mortals be.

Shirley Jackson


According to the Rand McNally Places-Rated Almanac, the best place to live in America is the city of Pittsburgh. The city of New York came in twenty-fifth. Here in New York we really don't care too much. Because we know that we could beat up their

Shoaff Edgar A.


Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.

Shoales Ian


per year.

Sidney


The trouble with the rat-race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

Sidney Greenstreet


Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.

Sidney Paternoster


The absurd is the essential concept and the first truth.

Sidney Smith


Every man who has reached even his intellectual teens begins to suspect that life is no farce; that it is not genteel comedy even; that it flowers and fructifies on the contrary out of the profoundest tragic depths of the essential death in which its

Siegel Corky


If you are shooting under 80 you are neglecting your business; over 80 you are neglecting your golf.

Siegel


May you live in uninteresting times.

Silve James Cabell


Better tried by twelve than carried by six.

Simon Paul


Let me assure you that to us here at First National, you're not just a number. Youre two numbers, a dash, three more numbers, another dash and another number.

Simpson Bart


Money can't buy happiness, but it can make you awfully comfortable while you're being miserable.

Sinbad


[Americans] are a race of convicts and ought to be thankful for anything we allow them short of hanging.

Sinbad


In the highest society, as well as in the lowest, woman is merely an instrument of pleasure.

Sinclair John


You get what you pay for.

Sinclair Lewis


Too much is just enough.

Skinner B.F.


It's not so hard to lift yourself by your bootstraps once you're off the ground.

Sky Patrick


The flush toilet is the basis of Western civilization.

Skywalker Luke


The superfluous is very necessary.

Skywalker Luke


Why does a hearse horse snicker, hauling a lawyer away?

Skywalker Luke


I know on which side my bread is buttered.

Skywalker Luke


You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred.

Sloan John


The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

Smith Alexander


The mome rath isn't born that could outgrabe me.

Smith Alvy Ray


Best Mistakes In Films In his "Filmgoer's Companion", Mr. Leslie Halliwell helpfully lists four of the cinema's greatest moments which you should get to see if at all possible. In "Carmen Jones", the camera tracks with Dorothy Dandridge down a st

Smith Evelyn E.


"There is no Father Christmas. It's just a marketing ploy to make low income parents' lives a misery." "... I want you to picture the trusting face of a child, streaked with tears because of what you just said." "I want you to picture the face of

Smith H. Allen


If you lose a son you can always get another, but there's only one Maltese Falcon.

Smith J. Winter


He played the king as if afraid someone else would play the ace.

Smith Jonathan Michael


The Least Perceptive Literary Critic The most important critic in our field of study is Lord Halifax. A most individual judge of poetry, he once invited Alexander Pope round to give a public reading of his latest poem. Pope, the leading poet of h

Smith Malcolm


Objectivity is to a newspaper what virtue is to a woman.

Smith Mike


There's such a thing as too much point on a pencil.

Smith Nancy Banks


"It's kind of fun to do the impossible."

Smith Red


"If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he next comes to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination."

Smith Sydney


Isn't it nice that people who prefer Los Angeles to San Francisco live there?

Smith Allen


You can bring men from other parts of the world who are sane. And you know what happens? At the very moment they cross those mountains... they go mad. Instantaneously and automatically, at the very moment they cross the mountains into California,

Smith Allen


Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops.

Smith v. Moran


He who has the courage to laugh is almost as much a master of the world as he who is ready to die.

Smith v. Moran


No one born with a mouth and a need is "innocent".

Smith v. Moran


XXI: It's easy to get a loan unless you need it. XXII: If stock market experts were so expert, they would be buying stock, not selling advice. XXIII: Any task can be completed in only one-third more time than is currently estimated. XXIV:

Smithsonian Maga


Go away, I'm all right.

Smolla Rodney


Innovation is hard to schedule.

Smollet Tobias


Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin.

Sneyd Doug


The only alliance I would make with the Women's Liberation Movement is in bed.

Snoopy


I remember when legal used to mean lawful, now it means some kind of loophole.

Snoopy


Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.

Snow C. P.


The trouble with opportunity is that it always comes disguised as hard work.

Snow Carrie


To err is human, to repent, divine, to persist, devilish.

Soaper Senator


Never appeal to a man's "better nature." He may not have one. Invoking his self-interest gives you more leverage.

Soc Michael Levin


It's odd, and a little unsettling, to reflect upon the fact that English is the only major language in which "I" is capitalized; in many other languages "You" is capitalized and the "i" is lower case.

Socrates


Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.

Socrates


We know all about the habits of the ant, we know all about the habits of the bee, but we know nothing at all about the habits of the oyster. It seems almost certain that we have been choosing the wrong time for studying the oyster.

Socrates


Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest r

Solo Han


The man who has never been flogged has never been taught.

Solo Han


Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten.

Solo Han


"You've got to have a gimmick if your band sucks."

Solo Han


I will make you shorter by the head.

Solo Han


Sic transit gloria mundi. [So passes away the glory of this world.]

Solo Han


The mind is its own place, and in itself Can make a Heav'n of Hell, a Hell of Heav'n.

Solo Han


Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones. Unfortunately, it's a lower case l.

Solo Han


Work is of two kinds: first, altering the position of matter at or near the earth's surface relative to other matter; second, telling other people to do so.

Solzhenitsyn Aleksandr I.


Fill what's empty, empty what's full, scratch where it itches.

Solzhenitsyn Aleksandr I.


Work Hard. Rock Hard. Eat Hard. Sleep Hard. Grow Big. Wear Glasses If You Need 'Em.

Somoza Anastasio


With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law; and every time they make a law it's a joke.

Sondheim Stephen


Never promise more than you can perform.

Sontag Susan


Si jeunesse savait, si vieillesse pouvait. [If youth but knew, if old age but could.]

Sontag Susan


Have you ever stopped to think what it would be like to have a woman President? "I can't deal with the Russians today. Not now. I've got my period."

Sontag Susan


That Xanthippe's husband should have become so great a philosopher is remarkable. Amid all the scolding, to be able to think! But he could not write: that was impossible. Socrates has not left us a single book.

Sophocles


The means-and-ends moralists, or non-doers, always end up on their ends without any means.

Sophocles


The man who runs may fight again.

Soul Messiah


Before you ask more questions, think about whether you really want to know the answers.

Soul Messiah


Luke, I'm yer father, eh. Come over to the dark side, you hoser.

Southern Terry


Who's scruffy-looking?

Southern Terry


In Hollywood, all marriages are happy. It's trying to live together afterwards that causes the problems.

Southern Terry


No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.

Spartacus


Illusion is the first of all pleasures.

Speer Albert


New Jersey is not the armpit of the nation; it's the asshole of the universe.

Spider Robinson


When in doubt, mumble; when in trouble, delegate; when in charge, ponder.

Spinoza


The day advanced as if to light some work of mine; it was morning, and lo! now it is evening, and nothing memorable is accomplished.

Spr Robert D.


Have the courage to take your own thoughts seriously, for they will shape you.

Spurgeon Charles


Laws are like sausages. It's better not to see them being made.

Stalin Joseph


The lunatic, the lover, and the poet, Are of imagination all compact...

Stalin Joseph


She ran the gamut of emotions from 'A' to 'B'.

Stalin Joseph


If you live long enough, you'll see that every victory turns into a defeat.

Stalin Joseph


From the cradle to the coffin underwear comes first.

Stallman R.


Recently deceased blues guitarist Stevie Ray Vaughan "comes to" after his death. He sees Jimi Hendrix sitting next to him, tuning his guitar. "Holy cow," he thinks to himself, "this guy is my idol." Over at the microphone, about to sing, are Jim Mo

Stamp Sir Josiah


When you die, you lose a very important part of your life.

Stand


...He who laughs does not believe in what he laughs at, but neither does he hate it. Therefore, laughing at evil means not preparing oneself to combat it, and laughing at good means denying the power through which good is self-propagating.

Stanislaw J. Lem


Small is beautiful.

Stanislaw J. Lem


The Public is merely a multiplied "me."

Stanislaw Lem


Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is merely a good excuse not to play football.

Stanislaw Lem


A man who cannot seduce men cannot save them either.

Stanley Kelley


When in doubt, tell the truth.

Starfighter The Last


If a man stay away from his wife for seven years, the law presumes the separation to have killed him; yet according to our daily experience, it might well prolong his life.

Stasheff Christopher


Very few blacks will take up golf until the requirement for plaid pants is dropped.

Steinbeck John


The first requisite for immortality is death.

Steinem Gloria


If you aren't rich you should always look useful.

Stekel Wilhelm


God helps them that help themselves.

Stendhal


Maternity pay? Now every Tom, Dick and Harry will get pregnant.

Stephen Leslie


So so is good, very good, very excellent good: and yet it is not; it is but so so.

Stephen Coonts


Stephen Pile


If a jury in a criminal trial stays out for more than twenty-four hours, it is certain to vote acquittal, save in those instances where it votes guilty.

Stephen Pile


Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.

Stern Jerome


It is Mr. Mellon's credo that $200,000,000 can do no wrong. Our offense consists in doubting it.

Stevenson Adlai


Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.

Stevenson Adlai


If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?

Stevenson Adlai


It's pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

Stevenson Adlai


Prediction is very difficult, especially of the future.

Stevenson Adlai


Do not seek death; death will find you. But seek the road which makes death a fulfillment.

Stevenson Adlai


Go ahead... make my day.

Stevenson Robert Louis


Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.

Stevenson Robert Louis


Nothing will dispel enthusiasm like a small admission fee.

Stevenson Robert Louis


I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would come into my neighborhood after dark.

Stevenson Robert Louis


Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art.

Stimson Henry


The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell.

Stinnett Caskie


Life is like a 10 speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.

Stolberg Benjamin


Genius is pain.

Stone I.F.


If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem.

Stone Judge Harold T.


We have art that we do not die of the truth.

Stone Judge Harold T.


A society in which women are taught anything but the management of a family, the care of men, and the creation of the future generation is a society which is on its way out.

Stone Robert


If little else, the brain is an educational toy.

Stone W. Clement


One man's Mede is another man's Persian.

Stoppard Tom


He that teaches himself has a fool for a master.

Stoppard Tom


No man is an Iland, intire of it selfe; every man is a peece of the Continent, a part of the maine; if a Clod bee washed away by the Sea, Europe is the lesse, as well as if a Promontorie were, as well as if a Mannor of thy friends or of thine owne we

Storm Johnny


Absolutum obsoletum. (If it works, it's out of date.)

Strachey Lionel


You never have to change anything you got up in the middle of the night to write.

Strange de Jim


It is better to have loved and lost

Strangers Lovers and Other


Mankind is poised midway between the gods and the beasts.

Stravinsky


My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed.

Sturgeon Theodore


Why am I so soft in the middle when the rest of my life is so hard?

Summer Graham


A businessman is a hybrid of a dancer and a calculator.

Sunday Billy


Believe everything you hear about the world; nothing is too impossibly bad.

Superchicken


"...The name of the song is called 'Haddocks' Eyes'!" "Oh, that's the name of the song, is it?" Alice said, trying to feel interested. "No, you don't understand," the Knight said, looking a little vexed. "That's what the name is called. The nam

Surtees R.S.


My father, a good man, told me, "Never lose your ignorance; you cannot replace it."

Susan Brownmiller


Unprovided with original learning, unformed in the habits of thinking, unskilled in the arts of composition, I resolved to write a book.

Swan Paradi


Eeny, Meeny, Jelly Beanie, the spirits are about to speak!

Swayze John Cameron


Beggars should be no choosers.

Swift Jonathan


If there is no wind, row.

Swift Jonathan


Armenians and Azerbaijanis in Stepanakert, capital of the Nagorno-Karabakh autonomous region, rioted over much needed spelling reform in the Soviet Union.

Swift Jonathan


... [concerning quotation marks] even if we *___did* quote anybody in this business, it probably would be gibberish.

Sylvan Kayvan


Term, holidays, term, holidays, till we leave school, and then work, work, work till we die.

Syrus Publilius


Instead of loving your enemies, treat your friends a little better.

Syrus Publilius


You climb to reach the summit, but once there, discover that all roads lead down.

Syrus Publilius


If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish.

Syrus Publilius


It is a lesson which all history teaches wise men, to put trust in ideas, and not in circumstances.

Syrus Publilius


Monterey... is decidedly the pleasantest and most civilized-looking place in California ... [it] is also a great place for cock-fighting, gambling of all sorts, fandangos, and various kinds of amusements and knavery.

Syrus Publilius


Remember that there is an outside world to see and enjoy.

Syrus Publilius


You can get much further with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.

Syrus Publilius


Roumanian-Yiddish cooking has killed more Jews than Hitler.

Syrus Publilius


Think sideways!

Syrus Publilius


Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in.

Syrus Publilius


"I don't mind going nowhere as long as it's an interesting path."

Syrus Publius


I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.

Szasz Thomas


All men know the utility of useful things; but they do not know the utility of futility.

Szasz Thomas


XXVI: If a sufficient number of management layers are superimposed on each other, it can be assured that disaster is not left to chance. XXVII: Rank does not intimidate hardware. Neither does the lack of rank. XXVIII: It is better to be the r

saying Folk


The greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves.

saying Yiddish


Events are not affected, they develop.

sees it constantly





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Confucius say too much.
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